recently read an article called "Don't be friends with children at the age when it should be established." The main point in the article is just like the title of the article, which opposes the blind emphasis on being friends with children, but she still believes that children and parents can be friends, but I don’t agree with this. This reminds me of a view that once was popular, called "Parents should be friends with their children." I have always opposed this view because I think it is impossible for parents and children to be friends!
Children are your relatives, not friends,
First from the general understanding, people usually call people who have good relationships with each other and who can often date friends, and their highest level is confidant. And your child is naturally your relatives and someone connected with your blood. Whether you like it or not, or even really cut off relations with your child, you cannot truly get rid of him. But friends are completely different. If you like them, you can be close to him. If you don’t like them, you can be alienated and even completely cut off contact. After a period of time, you won’t even think of him.
Natural inequality in status
Hospitals are elders and children are juniors. The two are naturally not equal subjects in status. How should they be friends? Anyone called his friend son? Can your child be brothers and brothers with your other friends? Obviously these are impossible, because the inequality of father and son status is natural.
Age is also a gap
According to the current marriage law in my country, men can only get married at the age of 22 and women at the age of 20. Even if they have children one year after marriage, and the difference between their children and their parents is 21 to 23 years old, how should they be friends? The child may not be able to do what you can do, on the contrary, you may not be able to do what your child can do. For example, you can smoke and drink, but your child can't do it, right? For example, your child can wear open-crotch pants, but you can't. Age is a natural gap and cannot be overcome!
Life requires different requirements for the two
Parents’ responsibility is to raise and educate their children. The responsibility of minor children is to grow up healthy, one is the trainer and the other is the trained person. How should we be friends? You have the responsibility to make money to raise children, you have the responsibility to send children to school, your children have no responsibility to make money to support you, and you have no responsibility to send you to school. Some people may say that when your child grows up, he will have the responsibility to make money and support you. But that's called support! And there is a prerequisite. And everyone should know that the content of supporting parents is completely different from the content of raising children. If your parents have income, you don’t need to pay. If your parents are healthy, you don't need your care. Therefore, the requirements of life are also a barrier. Defining you and your children as different people, such differences cannot be changed.
So, don't try to be friends with your kids!
The correct way to get along is to be a good parent and do what parents should do, that is, try their best to create conditions for healthy growth for children. The specific point is to make money and try to provide better material for children; work hard to improve themselves and set an example for children; work hard to manage a good family and provide children with a harmonious family environment!
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-