Wang Xiaobo said: People’s anger is a manifestation of their incompetence. If you don’t understand this sentence well before, you will ask back: Even though you know that anger hurts your body, if you don’t have those people and things that make you angry, why would you be angry?
Slowly, you found that you could understand the meaning of this sentence.
A child is angry, he must have encountered a problem that he cannot solve himself. For example: His parents did not satisfy him to watch cartoons, he did not get the toy he wanted, he could not answer a math problem, and he needed to recite a long classical Chinese...
In short, when a child gets angry, the reason for his anger is mostly because his ability is insufficient.
can’t watch cartoons or get new toys because he does not have enough voice, nor enough reason and ability to express himself.
Although cartoons and new toys may play a negative role in life, perhaps at the moment when the child proposes it, he has urgent needs and sufficient reasons.
But no matter how wronged he feels, because he is a child and he is facing adults, and the requests he makes are recognized as "inappropriate" in the adult world, so he cannot realize his wish.
Adults are authority that children cannot compete with. In this case, the child is a completely weak person. He has no ability to challenge adults, but he really feels wronged in his heart, so he can only get angry!
The same is true. When a slightly older child encounters difficulties in his studies, he will also get angry! Mathematics problems that cannot be solved, classical Chinese that you have a headache when you look at, and English words that you can never finish memorizing...
Children often throw books with a hard time, or roar at a math problem! For children who want to learn but cannot learn well, those unsolvable questions are enemies who defeat him one by one. He is too weak and the enemy is too strong. He does not have the ability to fight against the enemy. The depression in his heart can only be vented by anger.
The same child will not be angry when he solves the problems he will do, because those homework is just tasks that he needs to complete. He can finish it as long as he spends time. Even if he feels that there is too much homework and has no time to play and is irritated, he will only complain and not be angry.
The study that can make him truly angry must be something that cannot be solved within his current ability.
The reason why adults are angry is a manifestation of their incompetence! Whether it is because of work salary, interpersonal relationships or physical health, what really makes an adult angry is something that he cannot solve.
Colleagues in the same project team, I work overtime when others raise their salary, often happens in reality. It would be fine if the person who works overtime is kept in the dark. If the truth is unfortunately known, nine out of ten people will be angry. The reason why
gets angry is nothing more than two points: one is that I feel that the leader is unfair, so why should I treat it the same thing?
and the other is that I think I am incompetent. If I can handle the project or the leader, I will not end up like this. No matter which of these two reasons are, they are deeply because of "self-incompetence". Is it unfair to lead
? What a leader wants is the result. If a person can bring benefits to the leader that are seen by the naked eye, the leader will of course treat him preferentially. It cannot bring benefits to your leader, and even if you work overtime every day, you won’t let him raise your salary.
There is a story like this: a company faces a problem and cannot be solved for a long time. The boss dug up a talent from another place and solved it perfectly within three days.
The boss retained the talent with a high salary, not only gave him a separate office, but also allowed him to go to work without any slightest, allowed him to be late and leave early, and allowed him to smoke and play games during work hours. The veterans of the company felt that it was unfair and went to the boss to argue with him. The boss said, "If you have the ability of him, I will give you the same treatment." The success made the veteran so angry that he wanted to resign.
This society is a society that depends on qualifications, a society that looks at the face and relationships, and a society that looks at abilities.Even if you have qualifications and appearance, you will still be angry when you are not capable enough!
Almost every angry person believes that they forced me to this point. If it weren't for their
, how could I be so angry? !
Talents are not geniuses, and it is impossible to be proficient in everything. "Being capable" does not require you to be able to do all kinds of martial arts like Sun Wukong. You only need to be proficient in some aspects, or you only need to become an expert in one aspect.
A person who is truly capable in a certain aspect will not easily lose his temper because he has his own "ability". Even if he encounters things outside his ability, he can lower his posture and ask for advice, because those who have the confidence to ask for advice are actually a kind of humility.
Anger is a useless manifestation and a catharsis of one's own incompetence. Instead of letting life force yourself to get angry, it is better to calm down and study the same abilities as you can withstand so that you can stay away from anger for the rest of your life without being forced into a corner by others or things, and use the abilities you truly have to stay away from anger forever!
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