From a baby in a swaddle to learning to turn over, learn to sit alone, learn to crawl, and finally learn to walk by yourself. As children grow up, we witness many firsts.
In this process, we also let go again and again, let the child take the first step in life, let the child touch the plants on the roadside, let the child eat by himself...
We enjoy the child's dependence on ourselves, but we are more willing to let the child go, let the child try by himself, and let the child form an independent personality!
Children grow up day by day, letting the children sleep alone in separate rooms, it becomes an inevitable process.
How old is the child suitable for sleeping in a separate room? This depends on whether the child's physiological and psychological abilities meet the standards. Normally, recommends that children try to sleep in a separate room at the age of three to five years old. However, whether the child is suitable for sleeping in a separate room depends on the child's psychological endurance.
In other words, if the child strongly resists sleeping in separate rooms at the age of five, it means that the child has not fully accepted the fact that he has divorced his parents psychologically, and parents need to gradually get away, rather than force a one-size-fits-all approach.
So how do we identify whether children are suitable for sleeping in separate rooms?
is recognized from both physiological and psychological aspects:
Physiologically, if a child can get on and off the bed by himself, express his wishes, go to the toilet, etc., he can consider sleeping in separate rooms with his child.
Psychologically, whether children are afraid of sleeping in separate rooms. For example, my girl is afraid of the dark and is also timid. If this type of situation exists, parents need to create a safe enough sleeping atmosphere and gradually train their children to sleep in separate rooms alone.
What are the benefits of sleeping in a room?
. It is conducive to the development of children's independent consciousness.
The child began to develop self-awareness since he was 1 and a half years old, realizing that this toy belonged to him and that this is his thing.
At this stage, parents need to start from the details of life and adapt to their children's psychological development.
sleeps in separate rooms with the child, creating an independent space for the child. The child has his own room and his own daily necessities, which will help the child's independent consciousness develop.
. Sleeping in separate rooms can give children a better sleeping environment.
The child and his parents sleep in the same bed. The bed area is not large and there is not much space left for the child. Sometimes parents toss and turn or even snore may disturb the child's sleep.
Adults' bodies and quilts may be pressed against the child by accident, causing danger.
Sleep with your child, and parents' breathing will produce a large amount of carbon dioxide , and the room space is also limited, which may affect the growth and development of children for a long time.
In the human body, the oxygen consumption of all tissues is the largest brain tissue. Under normal circumstances, the oxygen consumption of adults is relatively small compared to the brain oxygen consumption of children. In the exhaust gas environment jointly discharged by parents and parents, the children in the middle are in a space with insufficient oxygen supply and full of carbon dioxide. This leads to instability in children, nightmares, crying and other phenomena, which will seriously affect the growth and development of children.
. Can help children have correct gender cognition and establish correct gender awareness.
When my girl was over two years old, she took a shower one day, she pointed to two little dots on her chest and asked me, "Mom, what is this?" She would point to the public bathroom and ask why there is a sister in a skirt in front of the female bathroom, and an older brother in pants in front of the male bathroom.
As the child grows and develops, he begins to develop a sense of gender. If the child still sleeps with his parents, it is easy to have gender confusion, and in severe cases, it may also lead to Oedipus complex.
If the child has been sleeping with his parents, when facing the opposite sex, the child does not know how to protect his privacy and will not have the awareness to protect his body.
. Improve children's hands-on ability.
The child sleeps in separate rooms. He has his own independent space. He can learn to make his own bed, match his own clothes, tidy up the room environment, clean his own room, etc., giving him an independent space, which can improve his child's hands-on ability.
. exercises children's skills in solving problems.
The child sleeps alone in separate rooms. When it is cold, he will build a quilt by himself. When it rains, he will close the windows of the room. When the room is messy, he will clean it up by himself. Children's ability to solve things is accumulated bit by bit by bit. Starting from small things in life, cultivate children's ability to solve things themselves.
What preparations do you need to make before going to bed in bed?
. Do a good job in children's psychological construction.
provides children with psychological construction about growing up. I often say to my girl, "Baby, you have grown up, and the younger brothers and sisters downstairs call you sister. My sister can sleep in a room by herself. Everyone will say you are great!"
In daily life, it constantly strengthens the child's consciousness. Even if the child is rejected at the beginning, through constant motivation, he realizes that he has grown up and develops confidence in facing independence!
. Use the power of role models.
For example, if my girl is, I will encourage her, you see, Peppa Pig and George both sleep in the same room.
So when she is scared when she lets her sleep in a room herself, she will think of "role model" Page and George both sleep in the same room herself, and she will try to overcome her fear.
3. Give the child a sense of ritual before dividing the room.
A sense of ritual can promote a person's sense of identity with one thing.
We might as well give the child a sense of ritual before going to bed, buy some snacks and a small cake that the child likes, prepare small signs for the child's room, write the child's name, and even ask the child to draw a picture and write it on his room and hang it on the door of the room, so that the child can recognize that this is his room.
. Create a sleeping environment full of security for children.
Rooms should not be too large. Excessively large rooms lack a sense of warmth, which can easily make children afraid.
Children's bed should be placed against the wall as much as possible, so that the child will feel more secure.
Choose the right children's bed:
Choose the children's bed with a removable guardrail. Choosing a children's bed with a guardrail can prevent children from falling out of bed when they are not used to sleeping alone. When the child develops the habit, he can remove the guardrail and let him sleep alone.
Choose a material-safe children's bed. One-third of people spend their time sleeping, and choosing a children's bed with a safe and qualified material is particularly important, which can ensure the health of the child. The children's bed chosen by
should not be too high from the ground. At the same time, the children's bed with a width of 1.2 meters is enough at the beginning. An oversized bed will make the child feel too empty and lack security.
Choose a suitable mattress. The choice of mattress is closely related to the growth and development of children.
(1) When choosing fabrics, try to choose pure cotton, choose environmentally friendly products, pay attention to its fabrics, and whether there are chemical ingredients added. Children's skin should be in contact with it, and it is particularly important to choose safe fabrics. If you choose unsafe fabrics, it may cause allergies in your child.
(2) When choosing a mattress, you also need to pay attention to breathability, because the child is more hot in body, so you should choose one with strong breathability, so that the child can sleep more comfortably.
(3) Choose a mattress that can be removed and washed. Children are still in the growth and development stage, and sometimes they will inevitably wet the bed and dirty the mattress. Choose a mattress that can be removed, so it will be more convenient to clean.
(4) You need to pay attention to the size. The height should not be too thick. The width should generally be wide enough. Children sleep on the mattress and can turn it around at will.
(5) Another point is that it cannot be too hard or too soft.If it is too soft, it will be bad for the child's bone development, but if it is too hard, it will be uncomfortable for the child to sleep on it.
To prevent children from falling when they get up at night, we can install a darker night light . If possible, install induction lights on both sides of the bed, so that we don’t have to worry about the children getting up at night.
. Let the child decorate the room by himself.
Let the child choose the bed they like. For example, my girl chose a small room-shaped bed. In addition to increasing her sense of identity with her room, she also likes to stay in her small space on weekdays.
allows children to choose a bedside carpet he likes. In addition to adding to the warmth of the room, the soft carpet can also protect the child from accidentally falling off the bed.
Let children choose their favorite bedding, lighting, curtains, wallpaper, etc. My family just lets the girl choose cartoon wallpaper by herself and participate in the process of pasting the wallpaper. She often happily introduces to relatives and friends, "This is the wallpaper she posted!"
She is very happy to be involved in the layout of her room. Whenever she introduces to others which parts were arranged by her, she will be very proud. This sense of pride also deepened her sense of identity in her room alone.
. Let the child continue to use the previous items.
The child sleeps alone in his room and feels strange when he first comes into contact with a new environment, so he may feel scared and afraid.
We can use the previous items for children, such as quilts, bed sheets, , pillows, toys, etc. Smelling the familiar smell and looking at the familiar bedding will increase the child's sense of security.
. You can accompany your child to fall asleep before leaving.
Children's sleeping in separate rooms must require a familiar process. In the early stage, parents can wait until their children fall asleep before leaving.
Before going to bed, you can tell him bedtime stories and chat, and wait until he can relax and create a better sleep environment.
At the same time, parents can say to their children, "Mom chats with you, and when you fall asleep, go to the room next to you. If you have anything, you can come and talk to your mother." Let the children slowly adapt to the process of sleeping in separate rooms.
. After starting to sleep in separate rooms, you should learn more about your child’s thoughts and care more about your child.
You can ask your child "How did you sleep yesterday?" "What else do you need your mother to help you?" At the same time, you can praise and reward your child for being able to sleep in separate rooms alone.
At the same time, you should also observe the child's daily life to see if he has adapted, whether he needs adjustment, etc.
Children grow up day by day and need parents to let go, let the children try more for the first time. Every time you let go, it means that the child has learned another new skill.
Let the child sleep in separate rooms, so that the child has a space of his own, complete his own things alone, overcome every difficulty in new things, and help improve the child's survival ability, cultivate an independent and self-reliant personality, and make the child's personality more independent!
Author: Waiting for Fenglai
Working mothers in the workplace, holding a pen in their left hand and taking care of their children in their right hand. They like reading, writing, painting, and firmly believe that even if life is messy, they must have the poems and distance they yearn for in their hearts. Follow me and continue to provide you with more parenting information.
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