The prerequisite for educating children is to understand the child. What is the prerequisite for understanding the child?
- Some people say that they understand what children eat, wear and play.
- Some people say that they understand what their children study, what tutoring, and what class they go to.
- Of course, some people know what they should know about children so that they can grow up.
Seeing this problem, let me talk about it concisely from three aspects.
The prerequisite for educating children must be to understand the child. The prerequisite for understanding the child requires understanding the child’s three aspects:
1. The child’s mental blueprint-what he wants to do when he grows up is the child’s Life Goal
For example, some children want to be soldiers when they grow up. Many of his toys and other activities are based on this goal, such as watching war films, Lego war games, and Adults play wars and so on.
When you understand your child’s goals, you have to revise your child’s expectations. If you expect your child to be a lawyer in the future, and your child wants to be a soldier in the future, then we must be consistent with your child’s life goals , Or if you want to revise your child’s life goals, you can only start with the child’s nearest goal, such as switching from a soldier to a policeman, a firefighter, and so on.
When you and your child’s goals are aligned,In the things you set up, children are more active in doing things instead of procrastinating. In fact, children’s procrastination is invisible resistance.
2. Children’s emotions-----No matter the child’s joy, sorrow, sorrow or joy, we all need to receive it first
When the child has something happy to share with you, you You need to receive it right away and share your child’s happiness; when the child has something wrong with you to tell you, you need to receive it immediately, listen to the child’s grievance, and then help the child eliminate the unhappiness in the heart; when the child loses his temper, you need to Accept it first, let the child express his temper, and then ask him why he is angry, and help him find the root cause together.
Children’s emotions need to be released, and children’s emotions need to be understood, so that children can thrive; so receiving is particularly important.
When we are chatting with others, if the advice given by others is rejected at the beginning, it is equivalent to closing a chance for change; and if the child’s emotions are rejected by us as soon as they show up, then we will not only Only closing the opportunity to understand the child has laid a hidden danger for the child's growth.
3. Children's environment-----As the saying goes, those who are close to Zhu are red and black are black, and Meng's mother's three migrations make sense
The story of Meng's mother's three migrations, we have all heard , Mencius's mother moved her home three times in order to give her children a good learning and living environment, and put them in ancient times. This is a thing worth learning.
Nowadays, parents focus more on their children's eating and drinking, and on studying for examinations and employment. Now people are more focused on their children's learning environment and what kind of friends they make.
now,We can see such a phenomenon. Parents of students in rural areas send their children to the county seat, parents of children in the county seat send their children to the city, and parents of children from small cities send their children to the big cities. Sometimes, parents not only change their children to school, but send many children to private schools.
Objectively speaking, the teaching staff and educational environment of private schools are better than those of public schools. Why do private school students perform well? In fact, it is not just to let children learn as we thought, but to learn from the surroundings. The impact of the environment is changed through the impact between school students.
and often in public schools, a teacher brings two classes, which is simply too much to manage; like my child’s first and second grade homework teachers are basically not responsible for corrections, they are all corrected by their parents, and children often fight with classmates in school. Teachers can’t take care of it. Private schools should be better in management and guidance.
Finally, educating children to understand children is the prerequisite, but only changing oneself is the fundamental
We all say what kind of parents have what kind of children, we have heard of the scholarly family , I have heard of the medical family, this is a good example, the family atmosphere and family influence is far-reaching.
If parents ask their children to study hard and turn their heads to play on their mobile phones and enjoy themselves, how the children think, he will think that what you say is fake, reading is unhappy and fun, and watching mobile phones is fun.
Therefore, the process of educating children is actually the process of educating oneself. Since children entered kindergarten, I found that educating children cannot rely solely on preaching, and we need to lead by example. So, when I started reading and writing, I was actually setting an example for my children.
Wang Yangming became a sage,His father Wang Hua was the champion, and his grandfather Wang Lun came from the scholarly family. If you push up, the ancestors can be traced back to the calligrapher Wang Xizhi .
We see that children are a shadow of their parents. The influence of parents is very important for the growth of children. The root of changes in children lies in the changes of their parents.
Essence reading:
How to achieve wealth doubling? Three wealth classics, upgrade your wisdom, and open up your life
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