There is a saying: Be kind to others, do good to yourself, have a way to others, and have a retreat from yourself.
You release your kindness to life, and life will also repay you with kindness.
The greatest wealth in a person's life is to control his own face, control his mouth, and manage his heart.
01
Control your face
Confucius said: A gentleman is harmonious but different, while a villain is the same but not harmonious.
A gentleman takes harmony as the most important thing, which means being open-minded, while a villain is forcibly pretending to be kind, but he is not in line with his mouth.
A person with a real realm and pattern must treat every twists and turns in his life with a harmonious face.
Only in this way can we truly get the kind-hearted feedback from this world.
Prime Minister of the Tang Dynasty Lou Shide is generous by nature, but he is obese and walks very slowly. Once when he went to court with another minister, Li Zhaode, he had to stop and wait for him several times, but Lou Shide still couldn't catch up.
Li Zhaode was impatient and couldn't help but curse angrily: "You country bumpkin!" Lou Shide smiled and said, "Teacher's ethics is not a country bumpkin, who is a country bumpkin." There was no intention of being stern.
Lou Shide could completely complain that Li Zhaode was rude to him, but with his kindness, he changed his colleagues' prejudice against him, and also won the praise of his superiors Wu Zetian , and eventually became a famous prime minister who has been remembered for the ages.
As the saying goes: The wise do not fight, the benevolent do not blame, and the good do not judge. What we are talking about is the principle of being kind to others.
The realm of life is reflected in letting go of these little grudges under your nose and looking up to the farther place.
Take a step back and the sky is wide open. Only those with open minds can be able to do whatever they want without changing their happiness.
Only by not competing for the right and wrong for a while can we maintain a kind face and not grit our teeth and be unrecognizable.
Only by not being petty about trivial matters can one make good relationships, keep oneself away from disasters, and make others feel like spring breeze.
Those truly outstanding people are often broad-minded, and those with broad-minded must also have a kind face. With a good face and kind heart, the road of life will be smoother and smoother, and ultimately achieve the perfection of life.
02
Control your mouth
In dealing with people, you must distinguish what is righteous and what is exposing people’s scars.
Only by distinguishing these two points will the listener be convinced and will not cause unnecessary trouble for himself.
Eastern Jin There is an important official named Huan Xuan. He likes hunting the most in his life, but his subordinates will always accidentally let the prey run away. When Huan Xuan was angry, he asked someone to tie up these subordinates, and everyone was in great pain. There is a man named Huan Daogong among his subordinates, who is of the same clan as Huan Xuan. He couldn't stand what Huan Xuan did, so he brought a red brocade rope around his waist.
Huan Xuan saw that he was surprised, and Huan Daogong replied, "As soon as you hunt, you like to tie people up. I am afraid I will be tied up, so I brought a rope myself to avoid the thorns on the thick rope piercing into the flesh, which makes it too painful."
Huan Xuan listened, and later became more restrained and tied people up less casually.
Some words have the same meaning, but expressing them in different ways may achieve completely different effects.
Talking straightforwardly never means being speechless, and speaking quickly never means being speechless.
Not necessarily everyone likes to listen to others flattery, but most people will not like to say "defying words" regardless of the occasion or without any face.
If you can't control your own mouth and see that others are doing something wrong, you will point it out fiercely that not only will it not solve the problem, but it will cause harm to others' hearts.
We might as well learn the art of speaking more, make the words more tactful, make the tone more subtle, and make the voice more gentle, leaving a step for the other party.
Good words, you don’t have to speak loudly, but you must know how to care about other people’s feelings, so that our lives can be smoother.
03
Manage your inner
The good and evil in your heart determine the good or bad of your luck.
With kindness, life will naturally turn bad luck into good fortune, and disaster will turn good fortune into bad luck; if you have bad intentions in your heart, life will naturally be in trouble, which will make it worse.
When you manage your heart well, you actually manage your own good and bad luck.
Peking Opera " Locking the Lin Case " tells a story:
Xue Xiangling, who was born in a wealthy family, met the poor girl Zhao Shouzhen on the day she got married.
When she learned that Zhao Shouzhen was unable to buy a dowry because of her poor family, she decisively took out her treasure-filled bag and gave it to her, and then the two of them separated in a hurry.
A few years after separation, Xue Xiangling's family was separated due to the flood, and he also left alone to the wealthy Lu family and became the young master's grandmother.
When taking care of the young master, Xue Xiangling found that there was a pair of locks in the small building of this family, which looked very familiar.
After learning about it, I realized that the wife of this wealthy family was actually Zhao Shouzhen, the poor girl of that year.
Zhao Shouzhen finally found the benefactor whom he had never found. He cried with joy and immediately became sworn sisters with Xue Xiangling.
Later, Xue Xiangling's husband also found her and the family finally reunited.
Just imagine when Xue Xiangling helped Zhao Shouzhen, it was the time when she was most proud. She never thought that she would receive sincere help from Zhao Shouzhen in the future because of her good thoughts.
Guanzi said: People who are good at it are also good at it.
When you give your kindness, you will inadvertently make good relationships for yourself.
Do not do anything about small good. All the kindness you release, even if you don’t get rewarded, will surely nourish your heart and make you a better person.
Manage your heart well and let the breeze blow away the darkness in your heart. Only by being happy with others and being happy with yourself can you take yourself to a higher level and see the most beautiful scenery in life.
May each of us light a bright light for others, illuminate others and illuminate ourselves.
