Time flies, and time flies. Five years passed in a flash. Looking back on the road I have walked over the past five years, I feel mixed in my heart - there are too many hardships and sadness, and of course there are also touching and warmth.
The current me is a loser in the eyes of others - no house, no car, no marriage, no career... But I recognize and respect myself in my heart. I don’t think I am a loser. On the contrary, I am very grateful for these five years, which brings me the baptism of my soul, the transformation of my spirit and the firmness of my will.
01 Writing brings me comfort in the soul
Psychologist Adler once said:
"Maturity is not about understanding the world, but about understanding human nature."
When you are in a glorious place, others will smile and be kind to you, and when you are poor and lonely, the only person who can pull you out of the quagmire is you.
At the trough of my life, I had hoped to get help from others several times, but what I gained was disappointment and despair. Just as I was on the verge of collapse in life, it was writing that saved me - it allowed me to talk to my own soul and made me find my spiritual home.
Until today, I have been writing for three years. This is one of the few things that I have been able to persevere since I was a child. Now I think about it, the reason why I can continue on the road of writing is that writing is like a safe haven for my soul. It can temporarily remove the armor and disguise on my body, face the fragile and sensitive self, lick the wounds of my heart alone in the middle of the night, and then reconcile with this world and myself.
So, although I have not earned any writing income for a long time, writing has made me realize the essence of life - We want to gain spiritual comfort, not because of the richness of external materiality, but because we must know how to seek internally, so that you can see different scenery in life!
Thanks for the inspiration and comfort brought to me by writing, which made me still love life after understanding the truth of life!
02 The wonderful uses of living in the present
Each of us has a "treasure box", but many people don't know it, or they just abandon it after they know it. This "treasure box" is your essence. When you know how to return to the essence, you will no longer be yourself.
To make you unite with your body, living in the present is a bridge.
Most of the time we are usually burdened by thinking. Thinking is a double-edged sword. If you use it to think and infer, it will help you make rational and comprehensive analysis, but when you are influenced by thinking, you will suffer.
According to statistics from an authoritative American agency, people have an average of 20,000 thoughts every day, of which 80% are negative and 90% are the same as the previous day. So if you become a slave to your mind, you will find it difficult to break free from the shackles of suffering.
. To escape from the cage of thinking, living in the present is the key, because thinking cannot exist alone without time.
After five years of reading and understanding, I finally discovered that understands that living in the present is a life issue that we cannot avoid and the last destination of our happy life.
I want to thank the despair brought by life. It is it that makes me survive and even lose the courage to live. It was also at that time that I longed to find a way to relieve my depression, so I began to accept living in the present moment devoutly.
And when I really started to practice it, my pain gradually became less - whenever I was unconsciously controlled by thinking, I would immediately become an observer of thinking, prompting myself to live in the present through anchoring my breathing, thereby reducing the pain and slowly improving my quality of life.
By living in the present, I feel the perfection and perfection of life. It turns out that happiness is so simple. As long as you live in the present and return to the essence, you can do it. This is a supreme enjoyment and a shortcut to the effect of happiness!
When I started to live in the present, I found that living is beautiful. Indeed, life is not satisfactory, but the purpose of living is only to live for life, not for things other than living. Although you will experience birth, old age, sickness, death, joys and sorrows, as long as you can live in the present, you can gain a sense of inner peace. Isn’t this a gift from life?
As Yang Jiang said:
"We once longed for the waves of destiny, but in the end we found that the highest state of life is the calmness and calmness in our hearts; we once longed for the expectations of others so much, but in the end we found that the world belongs to our own and has nothing to do with others."
03 Know how to let go of
Buddha said: Put down the butcher knife and become a Buddha on the spot.
Before, I could never truly understand the meaning of "let go", because I was stuttering and stuttering for a while.
Stuttering can be said to be a cancer of language. Only those who have passed the pain of this disease have unforgettable experience and skin-wrenching pain. Just imagine, what kind of experience would it be if you face your beloved person but can’t even say the word “I love you”?
I have had this experience before. In fact, the crux of stuttering is not the mouth, but the rigid thinking and the perspective of looking at the sky from a well.
Each of us will inevitably stutter when we speak, which is the most normal thing. But some sensitive people think this is an abnormal phenomenon, so they observe the problem of speaking and stuttering. As a result, the more they look for the problem, not only will it not solve the problem, but the more problems it leads to - it is difficult to speak and the phenomenon of medium obstacles is everywhere.
If I turn back at this time and accept the problem of speaking with a bit flawed, maybe I won’t fall deeper and deeper in the quagmire of stuttering. But not only did I not repent, I swear to fight stuttering to the end. The result of the fight against the laws of nature can be imagined. I was frustrated again and again in the struggle, and my self-confidence gradually became weaker in repeated defeats and fought. In the end, I didn't even dare to go out and say a word to others. I could only hide in the dark corner of the room and feel sorry for myself.
But I was unwilling to accept the arrangement of fate, so I found many solutions everywhere, and took many detours during this period and made many wrong choices, which made me on the brink of despair and even wanted to end my life for a while.
"There is no way out at the end of the road, and there is another village in the dark and bright future." Fortunately, through a lot of trial and error and persistence, perhaps I was favored by God. At a club meeting, I heard the speech of the former chairman. His speech was a perfect existence in my heart, but in that speech, his stuttering was unimaginable!
Afterwards, I suddenly realized: stuttering is a normal phenomenon that everyone has. It is my wrong concept and thinking. I put the problem of stuttering infinitely, causing myself to enter the "dead end" of stuttering.
Due to stuttering, I dare not pursue the girl I like, I dare not compete for a high-paying job, I dare not take the stage to give a public speech... I have missed many beautiful scenery that originally belonged to my own life!
Fortunately, I already know how to let go now. Let the past go with the wind. After all, life is not perfect, or in other words, imperfection is life!
At present, I no longer regard stuttering as my enemy, but choose to let go, tolerate my stuttering, know how to accept the disastrousness after stuttering, and live in peace with stuttering. Although I still stutter when I speak, my state of mind is already very different from before. I also feel that I was so ridiculous before, and I feel that I was so ridiculous and deeply feel that my thinking is terrible.
Thanks to these five years of experience, I know how to let go. When I let go of my stuttering, I also let me go, which allows me to completely gain spiritual liberation and be able to move forward slowly and firmly towards my inner dreams, regardless of success or not, no matter what the outcome!
written in the last
The changes brought about in the past five years, in addition to the above three points, I also willingly developed the habit of getting up early, meditating, and running through reading. Seeing myself getting better day by day, I was happy for myself from the bottom of my heart. In addition, I can also follow my inner call instead of being controlled by my thinking, so as to walk every intersection in my life well.
Although I am still in the darkest moment of my life, I have learned to accept the trough of life and my own ordinaryness, and regard the ordinary life as the norm, rather than a strong desire to change the ordinary status quo. Only in this way can I live the rest of my life calmly and calmly. As for that result, it will be left to fate.
These five years can be said to be the five years that have changed the most in my life. Although I am still penniless and useless, my spiritual world has long become abundant, and I can also gather the trivialities of life into a force and work hard towards my goal. After all, this kind of life is meaningful!
