Emotion is a double-edged sword that can drag a person into the abyss or make a person stronger.
When you are upset and your heart is eroded by negative emotions, it is the time to show a person's ability.
Napoleon said:
"A person who can control his emotions is greater than a general who can win a city."
Authentic, truly capable people know how to manage emotions.
01 Negative emotions can make people go to the abyss
People are emotional animals. When anger comes, it is difficult to think rationally. It is most likely to be led by an angry thing.
After the inner turmoil, the anger in the whole body is most likely to be transmitted to others or affect others.
Negative emotions are like a steel knife that scrapes the bone, making people feel painful.
In interpersonal communication, you need to be kindest, maintain a good mind and control your emotions.
in "Romance of the Three Kingdoms" Zhang Fei is a person who does not know how to control emotions.
I heard that my good brother Guan Yu was killed. He used his sadness to whip the soldiers, and for the sake of revenge, he forced them to build weapons day and night.
part Fan Jiang and Zhang Da could no longer bear it, so he resisted and killed Zhang Fei while he was drunk.
It can be said that Zhang Fei's death was a little frustrated because he was not killed on the battlefield, but was killed by his own emotions.
Zhang Fei's ability is obvious to all, but his ending also tells us that no matter how capable a person is, once he becomes a slave to emotions, he will only lead himself to the abyss.
I once read a news that a mother in her 30s in Fujian has a particularly irritable way of disciplined her 6-year-old son.
She often beats and scolds her son and corporal punishment.
One night, my son wanted to go to bed without washing up, but my mother didn't allow it, so she kicked her son hard in the abdomen.
Tragedy happened. At night, the son kept calling cold, and the mother touched the child's hands and feet and her consciousness began to blur.
After being rushed to the hospital for emergency treatment, the person could not be rescued. The doctor stated that the cause of the child's death was: the strong impact caused the child's liver and pancreas to rupture, and eventually shock died.
The young mother lost her son, and all of this was caused by her irritability.
John Milton said:
"If a person can control his emotions, desires and fears, he will surpass the king."
In today's society, everyone is under double pressure. When facing an unsatisfactory life, some people will hide their emotions, while others will let their emotions spread and grow, which will not only hurt themselves, but also hurt their families.
Don’t let emotional thinking overcome rational thinking. Everything should be based on the overall situation, everything should be based on the physical and mental health of yourself and your family. Only by being able to get rid of emotional constraints can you go further.
02 Release emotions and create a better life
If you want to control your life, you must first control your emotions.
You must learn to be the master of emotions, not the slave of emotions.
allows emotions to occur, but does not allow emotions to grow freely. This is the greatest maturity of a person.
1992, the famous host Bai Yansong suffered from depression . He was so stressed that he had alopecia areata . He couldn't sleep all night and was in a bad mood. The suppressed negative emotions of
made him unable to be interested in anything.
Later, he found a way to resolve negative emotions, which is to read.
Just as Maugham said:
"Reading is a shelter that you can carry with you!"
Through reading, he gradually found comfort, happiness, and hope in life in the book.
Sometimes, what crushes people is not the problem itself, but your own emotions.
When we don’t do something well, we will fall into anxiety. When we feel angry about something, we will be unable to extricate ourselves from this bad mood.
The best way to treat yourself well is to liberate yourself from all kinds of negative emotions.
Zhang Ailing wrote in "Little Reunion":
"When you know how to eat, be willing to wear, you won't mess up."
In life, you will inevitably encounter setbacks. At this time, your mood is most likely to become depressed and particularly bad. If you don't forgive yourself, it will be difficult for you to turn over.
Whether you are studying or asking someone to talk to, otherwise you can have a good meal, have a good sleep, tell yourself that it doesn't matter, and try every means to relax yourself.
Only by knowing how to release emotions, rather than letting emotions control oneself, can we create a better life.
03 Knowing how to manage emotions is also managing life
There was a question on Zhihu :
"What is the most important ability of a person?"
answers are diverse and different, but everyone has to point to one common point, that is, managing emotions.
Because of a little bit of trivial matter, there are many people who are furious.
There are also many people who fall into tension and anxiety due to a little setback.
All kinds of sadness, despair, and even crying, making life in trouble. Everyone understands the great truth of
, but when it is actually implemented, few people can do it, as if all kinds of emotions are always restraining us.
Once read a story:
A poor man made a fortune. In order to keep his money, he went to the city to find an old man to buy wisdom.
The old man told him: "The so-called wisdom means that no matter what you encounter, you will first take seven steps forward and then seven steps backward. This way, three times will come, and wisdom will come."
After hearing the old man's words, he believed and half doubted.
When he got home at night, he saw his wife lying in bed with another person.
Thinking that his wife had cheated on him, he picked up the axe and was about to chop it on the bed. Suddenly he remembered the old man's words, and he did as he did.
After calming down, I realized that the person around my wife was her mother.
It turned out that after dark, the wife saw that her husband had not returned home for a long time and did not dare to sleep alone, so she called his mother to accompany her, and he almost caused a disaster.
Xunzi said: "Anger cannot be taken away, joy cannot be given."
means that a gentleman's joy and anger cannot be done with fire, and both have a measure of his attitude.
You won’t be overjoyed when you encounter something happy. After all, people are prone to being extremely happy and sad, and you won’t be angry when you encounter something that makes people angry. After all, being angry can easily hurt your body and can also hurt others.
All things are calm in advance and treat everything in life calmly. You will find that many things can be solved in the most peaceful way.
Knowing how to manage emotions is actually managing life.
Before all bad emotions come, take a deep breath, don’t rush to react, think carefully about how to solve things, instead of just knowing how to solve them with emotions. This is the great wisdom of truly capable people.
Let you and I encourage each other!
