Wang Min is a Chinese teacher at Nancheng No. 1 Primary School in Shan County. He is straightforward yet humorous, gentle yet serious; he likes quietness and liveliness; he likes to be alone and in groups; sometimes he is old-fashioned, and sometimes he is childlike. I have many hobbies, but they are general but not refined. The only thing I am proud of is that I like reading.
Oh, father, you can hear your daughter’s confession in heaven.
Text by Wang Min
It’s the Ghost Festival of another year. Our family goes to pay homage to our father who has been away from us for almost sixteen years. Looking at the grass growing on the grave where my father was buried, I felt a heartbreaking pain. I would never see my beloved father again, the father I was once proud of. Now, I can only endure the guilt and unspeakable pain to remember my father.
In my childhood memories, my father was a very easy-going and kind-hearted person. He works out of town all year round, and because transportation was inconvenient before, he could only go home once a week. And every time I return home, I will buy some delicious things. When I was a child, I enjoyed beautiful clothes that no one else had, and tasted delicacies that no one else had seen. So waiting for my father to come home every week became the most memorable thing in my young mind. From then on, waiting occupied most of my childhood.
I admire my father. In my heart, he is the most handsome and dashing person. I always compare other people's fathers with my father. At that time, I felt that I was the happiest person in the world.
As I grew up, I no longer waited anxiously for my father as before. On the contrary, I resented him for giving too little to his family. I had enough of the pain of waiting. Watching other children and their families reunited and living happily, but I rarely saw my father, which only increased my resentment towards him. I began to feel unfair for my mother, but a kind mother will always stand up for my father. Excuse: I am busy at work and can’t help myself. But when I was in the rebellious period, I failed to understand my father. I even saw him without saying a word, and sometimes I would contradict him a few words. And every time I see my father looking sad, I feel an indescribable joy, accompanied by an inexplicable sadness. After all, he is my father!
Time flies, the sun and the moon fly by, in a blink of an eye, I am about to leave home to go to school, and my father goes to see me off. I let my father help me pack my bags and get me the things I needed. When everything was ready when we got to school, my father was leaving. Looking at my father's retreating back, I suddenly felt the urge to cry. Then I ran to the dormitory and really cried. Only then did I realize that flesh and blood are deeply connected! I love my father, I just don't want to admit it.
I started working, and my father retired at home as he got older. The only thing he can do is to prepare delicious meals for his family every day. Watching us eat them all with relish and looking satisfied, I can't help but want to say to him: "Dad, I'm sorry, you actually hurt." We, you are actually a good father.” However, I could never say it. Looking at my father’s kind smiling face, I couldn’t help but sigh: The long-lost father’s love! I waited so hard!
However, not long after this warm and harmonious life, I got married and was far away from my family. In addition, I was very busy with work and rarely went home. I could only go home a few times a year, and every time I came home, my father would always come home. He prepared a table of meals for us to eat, and he watched us sweep away the delicious food. I could read the deep fatherly love in his eyes. I also truly understood the meaning of being involuntarily, and I understood my father more deeply. I began to think about my family and the long-lost father's love. My father also misses me and occasionally comes to stay with me for a few days. Every day after get off work, I will see the delicious meals my father has cooked for us on the dining table. I enjoy this treatment as a matter of course. And he said sincerely: Dad is so kind!
My father loves us, and he gave me a taste of a mountain of fatherly love. However, I failed to truly love my father, because the resentment in my subconscious that did not disappear was deeply rooted, and I actually broke his heart again. I clearly remember that I was very upset because my work was not going well. When I got home, I sat on the sofa without saying a word. My father asked me, but I got angry at him for no reason.Said that he only caused trouble for me and couldn't see that I was upset. The father's expression dimmed for a moment, and he walked out silently without saying anything. I suddenly realized that I had made a mistake, but I did not apologize to him. The next day my father asked to leave. Only then did I realize that my father was angry with me, but I knew his temper and he would never hold a grudge against his daughter. However, from that time on, my father never came to my house again. It was also from then on that I learned that my father had heart disease, high blood pressure , and was unhappy. But the situation has come to this, and there is nothing I can do about it. I once vowed to pick my father up to live with me, but in the end I never had the chance. I also vowed to go back to my hometown a few more times to stay with my father, but I couldn’t find the time. I was busy and busy all day long...
until my father passed away. , I haven’t seen him in nearly half a year. After celebrating his 66th birthday, I only went home once, but because my father was busy, I went in a hurry and could not see him. Unexpectedly, I have never been able to see my father since then.
My father died of a sudden myocardial infarction, and none of us sisters were able to see him before his death. When my family called me at three o'clock in the morning to tell me that my father had been sent to the emergency room, an ominous premonition came over me. Although I did not believe that something would happen to him because my father had just turned 66, that premonition still prevailed. I rushed to the hospital and my father was already in the morgue.
Looking at my father's peaceful face, my eyes went dark, and unspeakable pain instantly hit my heart. I threw myself at my father's body and cried loudly: "Dad, wake up, I am your daughter! You once caused proud of Daughter! Why did you leave without saying a word to me? Why didn’t you listen to my daughter? No matter how much I shook, my father remained motionless. I was completely disappointed. I knew that what I didn't want to happen happened. My father and I have been separated from each other since then, and I will never see my respectable father again. I originally wanted to be filial to my father and make up for my mistakes, but I no longer had this opportunity. "The tree wants to be quiet but the wind does not stop; the son wants to be filial but his relatives are not there." Only I can understand this unforgettable pain. The father left, full of regrets, but left his daughter with irreparable pain. I didn't even think about food or drink when I sent my father away. I couldn't forgive myself. I just wanted to confess to my father, but can you in heaven hear me?
It’s the Chinese Ghost Festival again. Father, how are you doing in heaven? Did you know? I have never dared to put your photos in my home. I was afraid to see your kind smile. When I see you, I will think of my disrespect for you. Oh, father, you are kind and will definitely forgive your daughter for her carelessness and ignorance. Because you taught your daughter tolerance and understanding. Father, you may have forgotten that I have hurt your heart, but your daughter will always remember that scene. It is deeply engraved in my mind and makes me alert! I will turn my guilt toward you into love for my family, be filial to my mother, and be kind to my relatives.
Oh, father, in heaven, have you heard your daughter’s confession?
