In the relationship between men and women, women are usually not proactive, and, born like this, this is the nature engraved in the genes. Most women basically do not proactive even if they meet very good men. They would rather miss it than take the initiative. So, why? How did t

In the relationship between men and women, women are usually not proactive, and, born like this, is the nature engraved in the genes . Most women basically will not proactive even if they meet very good men. They would rather miss it than take the initiative.

So why? How did this seemingly "unreasonable" psychological characteristic of a woman form? Today, Lao Feng starts from evolutionary psychology and explains this matter clearly for you in the simplest and most understandable language.

In the cave era, there was such a passionate and unrestrained woman. Let’s call her “Active Sister” . Once, the active sister met a tall, strong and handsome young man. The young man had no name, so let's call him "Passive Brother" . The active sister fell in love with the passive brother at first sight, and she took the initiative to confess her love. When the passive brother saw the active sister, he didn't like it very much, but after all, he was a woman who came to the door. He didn't have to be responsible anyway, so the passive brother accepted it with a smile. After finishing, the passive brother thought to himself: This woman is not what I really like after all, and I am worried that she will entangle, so the passive brother ran away. The active sister chased her and couldn't catch up, which was very sad.

However, a month later, the active sister found in the hole: something bad happened, she was pregnant with .

very quickly. The active sister was very thrust into a big belly, and it was inconvenient to move. Hunting and gathering were all difficult, and no one provided her with food. It was snowing outside the cave and the weather was cold. During her pregnancy, the active sister starved to death. One corpse and two lives.

There is another version of this story:

Active sister is proactive because of her nature, she has had sex with passive brother A, passive brother B, passive brother C, and passive brother Ding. She is pregnant. Passive brother A, B, C, Ding It is really impossible to judge whether the child in the active sister's belly is his own , so the passive brother A, B, C, and D are unwilling to take care of the pregnant active sister . The active sister went to hunting and gathering with her big belly. After going through a lot of hardships, she barely gave birth to the child. However, during the breastfeeding period, she went out to hunt and gather, and the child was unattended and was taken away by the wild beast. In order to regain the child, the active sister fought with the wild beast. was also bitten to death by the wild beast, and the mother and son died.

Did you understand?

pair, in the history of human evolution ,

active women

all dead

not women don’t like “sex”, nor women don’t desire high-quality men, nor because women are stupid, but because in the history of human evolution, active women are basically dead, extinct, their genes disappear, extinct.

The story of the tragic death of the active sister and her child spread throughout the valley. All other women, , have learned the lessons of the active sister . After they summed up, they all believed that: , when looking for a man, you must choose the one who really likes me, truly loves me, sincerely willing to be with me for a long time, and are sincerely willing to hunt and support me and my children. Otherwise, I will end up like the active sister, both mother and son die, miserable.

Did these women summarize correctly? Of course, if a woman gets pregnant and breastfeeding and no one takes care of her, is related to life and death, and whether the genes can survive. This is a big deal.

So, how to judge whether a man really loves me and is really willing to be with me for a long time? Women think about it, there is only one way, that is: , don’t take the initiative, don’t take the initiative, don’t take the initiative, let men take the initiative, because in theory, only the man who falls in love with me will take the initiative to me, will pursue me relentlessly, and will treat me all kinds of goodness and licking me, and can develop a long-term relationship with me, and I can avoid the tragic fate of the active sister. Therefore, after the women summarized the lessons of the active sister, they formulated such a A strategy: not take the initiative, let the man take the initiative, and then, selects the one who pursues me the most sincerely, treats me the best, loves me the most, and is most likely to live with me for a long time from all the men who actively pursue me. Only in this way can I ensure that my children and I have to provide support, protect and take care of me and my children to the greatest extent when I am pregnant and breastfeeding, so that I will not die tragically.

So, an opposite example soon emerged in the valley: "Passive Sister" .

Passive sister does not actively pursue men, but adopts a passive attitude and waits for men to pursue her. She examines one by one from the active brothers A, B, C, D, and E who pursues her, screens out the active brothers A who are the best, loves her the most, and is most willing to live with her for a long time. She gives birth to a baby and organizes a family. Passive sister concentrates on taking care of the baby in the cave, and the active brother A is responsible for hunting and gathering . As a result, the passive sister and the active brother A live happily and have 5 babies in one go. The gene has been spread to the maximum extent.

It’s like this, the stories and lessons of “active sister” and “passive sister” are engraved in the genes of all women in descendants, passed down from generation to generation. This is why later on, women basically no longer have the initiative.

After reading this, we might as well analyze the two modes of early women choosing a mate:

Active sister mode: Women are proactive and cannot keep the father of the child, nor can they identify who the child's father is, so they cannot form a family. Women starve to death or are bitten to death by wild animals during pregnancy and breastfeeding. The child cannot survive, genes are eliminated, and extinction is achieved.

Passive sister mode: Women do not take the initiative, adopt passive strategies, wait for the man to chase, select the man who loves me the most and is the most sincere, organize the family, get pregnant, have children, and adopt a dedicated strategy to determine who the child’s father is, which is conducive to reproduction and offspring.

After reading this, the logic of things is very clear: in the history of human evolution, if women adopt the active sister model, it will be very is not conducive to the nurturing of future generations, and humans cannot form families in history. Without families, there will be no tribes, and without tribes, humans will not develop a high level of civilization. In other words, thanks to women not taking the initiative, otherwise, we humans may not have families, tribes, words, laws, countries, and highly developed civilizations.

Therefore, it is reasonable for women to not take the initiative in gender relations. It is the result of the survival of the fittest and long-term game in the evolutionary history. The mechanism of ensures the formation of human families and ensures that human cubs get the best nurturing and protection. The reason why our human civilization has flourished to this day has a lot to do with this matter.

OK, after talking about this, let’s summarize it roughly:

Summary 1: Women are not proactive in love, not because they are stupid, but on the contrary, because extremely rational . In the history of human evolution, basically all active women died. survived and reproduced, basically all non-active .

Summary 2: The physiological basis of women's pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding and other physiological basis determines: "Sex" is a high-risk and high-cost thing for women, so women are relatively more cautious about "sex". This is not determined by women's morality, but by women's instinct to seek benefits and avoid harm. In turn, it also holds true: men's attitude towards "sex" is relatively hasty, not because men are debauchery, but because sexual behavior is very low for men. To put it more naked: Assuming that the physiological basis and objective conditions of men and women are exchanged, then women will be as casual as men, and men will be as conservative as women .

Summary 3: Women not only do not take the initiative in the love field, but also tests male suitors in order to screen out male who are willing to provide her with prey and daily necessities for a long time. This is the instruction and survival dogma that female ancestors conveyed to female offspring through genes in the cave era.

Summary 4: In the cave era without DNA identification technology, women can determine that the child is their own, but it is difficult for men to identify who the child’s father is. Therefore, women adopt passive and dedicated strategies to create their own value in the competition in love. Women are relatively more dedicated not because of their noble morality, but because of their pros and cons and rational calculations. At the end of the story, there are still the same two old sayings: History is materialistic. Existence is reasonable.