In a romantic relationship, only two people with matching personalities can become real partners. The counseling relationship between a psychological counselor and a client is essentially a relationship. A psychological counselor needs to have some basic qualities in order to better communicate with the client. So, what are the most basic qualities a good psychological counselor should have?
1. Be helpful
The premise of consultation is trust. If the counselor is unwilling to help the client, the client will likely feel it and it will be difficult to relax and open up in front of the counselor. Therefore, psychological counselors must love their work and be willing to help others.
2. Excellent listening ability
Although visitors can also talk to family and friends, they often give their opinions or suggestions while listening to the visitors.
Excellent psychological counselors will not give their own opinions or suggestions to the client. Instead, they listen very carefully to what the client says and then feed back what the client says so that the client can hear their own words. They will also ask questions to help visitors see new perspectives and draw their own conclusions.
They will also hear what is behind the visitors' words and the pattern of visitors talking about things.
3. Good observation
A good consultant will also pay attention to the client's body language and habitual movements, and help the client pay attention to these things, helping the client better understand himself.
4. It is a good conversation object
In the first few conversations with a consultant, you may feel nervous, embarrassed or not know what to say, which is normal.
A good consultant can help clients relax in a short period of time, allowing clients to share their thoughts without restraint.
Please note that although it is easy for excellent consultants to talk to, they hardly talk about themselves to their clients. After all, it is the clients who are consulted, not them.
5. The true and consistent
No matter how good the consultant is, they cannot and will not act as if they know all the answers. If the consultant acts omniscient, it will give the client a sense of manipulation and make it difficult for the client to relax. When a consultant wearing a mask reveals his true face, the client will feel inconsistent and uneasy, which may also affect the client's trust in the consultant. Instead, a good consultant should work hard to be himself and remain “consistent” in front of his clients.
6. Reliable
A good consultant should arrange the consultation time of the client and start each consultation on time. If a special situation is encountered and the consultation is unable to be provided, the consultant must notify the visitor in advance to cancel the consultation.
7. Trust in people
It is also difficult for us to believe in them when we feel that others do not believe in us, or regard us as "patients" or "weak". A good consultant will trust the value of the client and the potential for the client to improve. In human-centered consultation, this concept is called “unconditional positive attention.” In other words, a good consultant never disappoints the client, never criticizes the client, or makes the client feel bad about himself.
8. Create a healthy environment
In consultation, the client needs to relax and concentrate, so the consultation environment is also very important.It doesn't need to be the most expensive furniture, nor does it need to be in the best location, but the room should be clean, comfortable, private and quiet enough to let the visitor hear his or her thoughts.
9. Conforming to consulting ethics
The consultant is a consultant, not a friend, and he cannot exceed the boundaries of a friend. A good consultant will never ask the client to see them outside of the consultation, will not buy gifts for the client, nor will he make inappropriate comments about the client's appearance or body, and will never cross the client's personal boundaries.
They will not make racist or gender-discriminatory remarks. They will respect the privacy of the visitors and do not tell anyone what the visitors say unless there is a confidentiality exception.
10. Supervisor supports
A good consultant will receive supervision regularly, and the supervision will help them always keep in mind the needs of their visitors. Supervisors also help counselors control their own self and emotions.
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