01
With the "confusingness of Bao's case", the case of the famous Taiwanese director Niu Chengze assaulting a female colleague, the lawsuit and trial that took nearly two years to complete finally settled, and Niu Chengze was sentenced to 4 years in prison.
In front of the woman providing enough evidence, Niu Chengze said: He and the victim had a good impression of each other, and even thought that the woman was willing to stay alone was also interesting to him, but he misunderstood and had no intention of sexual assault. The sentence
is really infuriating. The typical "I don't want you to think, I want me to think", is a malicious speculation of women.
I think most men don’t understand what “sexual consent” : “sexual consent” refers to obtaining and giving clear consent to the other party before having sex. It contains two concepts: first, without consent is sexual assault; second, sexual consent has a legal age.
That is to say, when the other party clearly states that it is unwilling to have sex or has not reached the legal age, it is considered sexual assault.
After Niu Chengze sexually assaulted, he first argued that the other party was interested in him, and then said that he was drunk and pushed the mistake on the woman. was because of the woman's kind attitude towards him, which made him misunderstand.
If according to his statement, plus the direction of public opinion and the unspoken social rules, the direction of public opinion is that the two have a good impression of each other, which side will they lean towards? What will the woman be misunderstood to be like? Anyone with a little brain will understand this relationship.
Fortunately, the woman issued a chat record of the two, and it was proved that they were not familiar with each other. Niu Chengze changed his words and said, "The two are moving in the direction of dating, and the woman also understands what he means."
At the same time, he told the sexual assault into an intimate action, and the so-called intimate action is to put the hands up and down, attack the chest, and finally, because he did not raise it, he succeeded in sexual assault with his fingers. The woman was injured afterwards and had multiple lacerations in her lower body.
Although the woman refused at the beginning, they could not hear the woman saying "no". They just wanted to think that yes, that should be.
02
Japan Shiori Ito gave a speech in September 2019: If no one discusses sexual assault, then I will do this.
In this speech, Ito also talked about his sexual assault incident, which was violated by a senior journalist who held great power in the workplace. Even if Ito calls the police, there is no way to convict him.
Similarly, Ito also talked about the view of "sexual consent" in this speech, and she listed a large amount of data to prove the misunderstanding of "sexual consent" in the relationship between the two sides of the gender.
Two people eat alone, which makes the man misunderstand that you have "agree to go to bed" as high as 11%, not to mention drinking alone, taking a car alone, exposed clothes, etc. Data like
is shocking. A common and uneasy moment in life will also become the other party's default "agree to go to bed".
But as men, do they not understand? Just as the barrage said: actually has nothing to misunderstand in this. Isn't it
? Those malicious men are only willing to believe in their consciousness and cannot hear the other party's word "no"; they think the other party's word "no" is actually a gesture of wanting to refuse but still waiting.
So, when most women are sexually assaulted, the man will always use the bad excuse that "certain behaviors of the woman make them have a certain illusion that everything happens based on the goodwill of both parties" and refuse to plead guilty.
03
It is undeniable that this excuse has been tried and tested in real life.
The man has been using his romantic relationship to argue in the case of "Bao suspected of sexually assaulting his adopted daughter". Beneath this sound, there are indeed many different sounds. These sounds make me feel terrible: the reason for this is actually because most people think that this exists.
Just as Yin Teng said in his speech: 96% of people will not choose to call the police. On the one hand, it is because most police are men, and women telling their violation process, which is not the case in men; on the other hand, it is the pressure of public opinion and the pressure given to women by the public.
"One slap can't be slapped" "If you don't wear it, you won't invade you" "If you don't go out alone, how can you let others misunderstand you?" and other similar words will directly make the injured person mentally collapse and even despair.
So, this is why people who are violated will keep silent and have psychological doubts: Is it because of me that others misunderstood? Is it my fault?
is like "Fang Siqi First Love Paradise": will think that it is dirty.
04
As a woman, I don’t want to repeatedly warn female compatriots that we must protect ourselves and do whatever we want. Sometimes, no matter how well we do, what can we do? Will rapists in this world disappear?
won't.
No matter what we do, those who will commit crimes will still commit crimes. What we need to do is to stand up bravely and make our own brave voice when we are hurt. The society should give such voices more respect and encouragement; the law should use an equal perspective and objective facts as the basis.
I have also encountered "workplace sexual harassment". When I just graduated from college, my boss was my boss. At first, I didn't know how to refuse, until one day, he wrapped his hand around my chest and I stopped shouting.
Although, since then, I have suffered a series of small shoes, I think, but I also rejected a series of "sexual harassment", or there will be greater damage in the future.
We all know that "sexual consent" has subjective intentions and is sometimes difficult to identify. But please don't, ignore every voice that bravely stands out.
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