reporter Chen Qianxiu/Comprehensive report
Hong Kong singer G.E.M. was previously rumored to have a relationship with the boyfriend of the rich second-generation stylist. Afterwards, he responded, "Don't eat melons, it's not nutritious." He clarified the domineeringly. She published a thousand-word article on December 31, reviewing her feelings in 2021, admitted that she has been very confused in the past few years and can't even control her emotions and tears. She also thanked the people who were by her side, which sparked everyone's association.
Deng Ziqi posted a thousand-word text on New Year's Eve IG, and her boyfriend responded with a bang. (Photo/Photo taken from IG/G.E.M.)
After G.E.M. left the company in 2019, she didn't know how to go. She lived in a hotel for several months in the second half of 2020 and wrote the song "Lonely". She originally wanted to express it through the song, but she didn't expect that this mood would continue until mid-2021. "I can't even find peace on the stage I once liked and confident."
admitted that most of them showed confidence and joy in front of others, and they were all pretending. One day, G.E.M. finally couldn't bear it. She cried in a group opened by several sisters, from late at night to 5 a.m. She felt that she had improved a lot recently and called her to thank many friends and her team, including Mark, who was immediately reminded of being her boyfriend Mark.
G.E.M.’s long article revealed that she was in a low mood in the past two years and finally couldn’t help but cry to her friends. (Photo/Photo taken from IG/G.E.M.)
G.E.M.'s long article attracted many blue-collar celebrities to leave messages to cheer up, while her boyfriend Mark left a message "Can someone translate to English? (Can you help me translate it into English?)", which unexpectedly attracted a lot of insults, mocked, "Don't you translate it yourself? Are you paralyzed?", "Control yourself." Some netizens also think that Mark actually understands Chinese and questioned that the goddess boyfriend left messages like this to "show his presence", which triggered two-sided comments.
boyfriend Mark left a message asking who could help translate, but unexpectedly attracted criticism from netizens for "showing the presence". (Photo/Photo taken from IG/G.E.M.)
[G.E.M.I.I.G.E.M.I.G.E.M.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I Open my first diary in 2021 (at that time, I had changed from writing diaries every day to writing occasionally), and at that time I wrote: "I finally came back to face my own thoughts, the pool that I should dive in but should have dived. I really need it, and I want to make a breakthrough. How tired of "normality". Maybe it's this kind of personality that has brought me to this day, but it's this kind of personality that makes me feel unnecessary anxiety too often..." The fourth diary reads: "I feel like life is like a diary that I occasionally write when I have time. After reading it many years, it's just a half-blank page, and a few more articles are forcibly finding something to write. There may be only a few pages of "historical significance"..." At this moment, I seem to have completely forgotten the first half of this year. It turns out that I had been so "confused". After leaving the company before and after 2019, I was pushed forward by reality for more than a year. Even if I don’t know how to walk, I have to walk. At that time, I didn’t have time to pay attention to my heart. One challenge came to me, and I could only face it and had no time to talk about my feelings. More than a year later, when many challenges have changed from strangers to familiarity, I finally have a little time to "feel" myself, and it turns out that I am so tired. So so tired. In fact, I am already very lucky. At least I am not moving forward alone, at least there are a few people around me who are trying their best to help me. In the second half of 2020, I had been living in the hotel for several months and wrote the song "Lonely". That was when I finally had the space to calm down and face myself for a long time. At that time, I thought it would be fine if I expressed it. But it turns out that this mood has continued until mid-2021, and it is still the case. In fact, if I think about it seriously, for a long time, I couldn't find peace even on the stage I once liked and confident. The heart is in a state of turbulence for a long time. It's hard to imagine, right? At the beginning of this year, I was still at BiuBiuBiu, singing and dancing "Super Powers" "easy".It’s not that I have no happiness or enjoyment for a moment, but if I’m honest, a large part of the confidence and joy in front of others were forced to pretend, forcing myself to bring joy and positive motivation to everyone. It’s not easy for everyone in the general environment. Positiveness is my duty, and this is my responsibility. I have been in a group with several sisters for about five years. Usually they share their happiness or not in the group. I rarely share my feelings until that day I finally couldn't collapse. I couldn't continue to "strength" with my willpower. That day I called for help from my sister group for the first time and told them that I needed some spiritual support. They asked me when I wanted to talk, and I said the faster the better. They actually drove the video with me at 12 a.m. that day until five a.m. I kept crying that night. They kept listening.
After chatting, will everything be fine? no. But at least it is the beginning. Face the beginning of your true self. I used to think I was already very real, but in my heart, I saw the most vulnerable and fearful part of me, and I said it, but I didn’t face it and deal with it. I was just ignoring it with my willpower. It’s like my body is covered with scars, but I pretend to be healthy, and I don’t treat the wound, and I won’t let it heal, and I will continue to move forward reluctantly.
In the past few months, I feel like I have a new life and my condition has improved a lot. When I find myself afraid of something, I no longer ignore it, but ask myself why I am afraid? What exactly am I afraid of? Only by figuring out your fears can you do everything out of love, not out of fear. This feeling is very free. Perhaps in the past decade, I have experienced this freedom occasionally, but I will always lose it again as I work hard. So over the past few months I have written diaries every day. Procure and cleanse your heart every day. Another point is not to lock yourself up and don’t walk alone on the road. The journey of life is constantly searching, finding it and losing it, and looking for it again and again, these are not problems. The problem is, when you walk alone, you get lost and no one supports you. At this moment, I really want to thank Lem, Diana, Jason, Juliana, Howard, Grace, Sherman, Sukie, Esther, Mark, and my team. The above is the person who really supports me when I was most confused. And my family and friends. I don’t have a New Year plan in the new year. Because I feel like I have begun a new life in the past few months. It turns out that the process of finding oneself with a breath of life can be very long, and there are so many tears in the process. But at this moment, I really feel that I have gained a lot in 2021, everything is worth it, I feel that I have been purified and evolved again. Thank God for leading me and protecting me. 2022, love again, love again. I wish you all the best in the new year and have companions moving forward with you. I wish you all a new beginning full of love, a beautiful, free and not lonely!
