In fact, many people are always humble when asking for help. Although they may feel that their self-esteem cannot stand, or they are very shameless, they have to do such behavior. And even if you are humble and ask others for help, sometimes you won’t get a good result. If you want to make yourself more smoothly, you must master these four points. Not only can you do things, you don’t have to be humble.
1. Key links in asking for help
When you seek help, you must know how to make it go smoothly. Especially before you do things, you need to analyze the four words of seeking help, whether to ask for help first or do things first, or do things first and then ask for help. This requires clarity. Therefore, you must first establish a good relationship with your target person so that he can see your sincerity. Then you have the opportunity to talk about what you want to do. Most of the time, when people refuse to help, they feel like they are doing things for you without getting the benefits. So when you seek help, you have to see what you can do for others and make people feel that getting benefits is more smooth than doing things.
Of course, if you seek help, you don't have to give gifts.
First of all, we cannot directly link gift giving and doing things, so few people will agree to this purposeful help. Because accepting a gift is a sign of emotion, if you compare it with doing things, it is a transaction, and it is a denial of emotion.
Therefore, we should treat giving gifts as a way to communicate with friends, a gift that we do not intend to repay. Never give gifts with the mentality of "I give gifts just to get rewards", otherwise there will be no good results.
Many young people think that giving gifts is an unhealthy trend and they despise such things. But when they really encounter the need to give gifts, they feel the need to do things by giving gifts.
2. Clarify the relationship
In fact, when we go to seek help, we all go with a very uneasy mood because we don’t know if this person will help us. But in fact, it takes some skills to ask people to do things. You can clarify the relationship first. It is necessary to clarify the relationship between these three levels. His leaders, himself and his subordinates need something, and understand this principle, the difficulty of getting things done will be reduced.
gift giving may not be successful.
Here, we have to say a misunderstanding that most people have, “As long as you give gifts, you can accomplish things.” In fact, in a good relationship, it’s more because you know each other, not because you give gifts to help you.
Therefore, giving gifts is just a means to accumulate connections, mainly to make your relationship "familiar" with it, rather than letting the other party owe you a favor, and then repaying the favor by doing things for you.
3. Make a lot of preparations in advance
It is also very important to know him before asking him for help. That is to say, you need to prepare a lot of information, so you can prepare his information first, and then when you ask him for help, you will have more countermeasures. In fact, some people who are seeking help, they don’t know who they should really seek help from, so you should know who you really want to look for.
gift is very exquisite.
Many people have little experience in giving gifts, and they will give gifts that they think are valuable. In fact, this idea is a bit biased. It is real to give valuable things, but more importantly, to give face. Those material things, such as "tobacco, wine, tea", etc., disappear after eating and drinking. Those things that support face will make others think of you as soon as they see you. For example, we give a sculpture the same price as a bottle of good wine and a good cigarette. But when others put it at home, they will be very proud, and when they see it, they will think of you.
Therefore, when we give gifts, we must give priority to those that look particularly high-end items, and try not to give consumables, so that others will not be so grateful after consumption. And real gifts are given before and after work.Giving gifts is too purposeful, so you have to say, "We are friends, can you help me?"
Go to give gifts after get off work and give him enough face so that others can see that you are sincere, so that it will be much easier to ask him for help next time.
4. Cultivate people who help you develop your connections
Sometimes if you ask others for help, they will reject you and don’t hate such people. You have to find a way to develop it into your own network of relationships, which means that before you ask others for help, you should handle your own relationship with them first. That is to say, although they reject you and help you, the relationship you should maintain must be maintained.
Summary: When we seek help, don’t have too much hope, because everything has half the possibility of failure and success. Even if others refuse to help, you will not get nothing.
