Author Li Yonghong is the executive dean of the Lawyer College of Zhejiang University of Technology and the dean of the Criminal Defense Branch. Legal reading library submission email: [email protected]. Original title: Bullying: Don’t forget your childhood.
"bullying", although the content is abominable, the word is undoubtedly one of the few words with excellent transliteration and translation. I first heard this word in the media’s related reports about Taiwan. At first I thought it was a commonly used Chinese word on the other side of the strait, and it turned out to be a Chinese translation of English words. Of course, there is another saying that some people on the other side believe that this word comes from the mainland.
Where the term bullying originates, it doesn’t matter. What is important is how adults correctly understand the world of children, how to view the bullying phenomenon that occurs between children, and how to guide children to take appropriate measures in the face of bullying to avoid physical and mental harm. Although everyone has a childhood, not everyone can understand and treat children well. Adults always treat children's affairs condescendingly, either domineering or disapproving. The correct way should be to squat down and listen to your children’s stories from time to time, experience and escort their growth. The so-called guardianship, education and protection are the only meaning.
Whether boys or girls, courage and righteousness are positive qualities. The so-called courage means taking action when it is time to take action (such as bullying behaviors that boys often need to face); the so-called perseverance means being self-controlled when it is self-controlled (such as how girls adjust their jealousy). Guo Ke is right. When he was aged 9-12, he longed for friendship between his peers, but when he was a little older, he cared about his peers' evaluation. But our childhood and teenage years are not all beautiful memories. It’s not that some people become bad when they grow up, but that some people are naughty and like to bully people since they were young. One of the purposes of education is to let people learn to get along with each other. If the teacher cannot do it, then parents and children must do it themselves: in the face of violent violations by classmates, a child’s normal reaction is to defend himself and fight back, and even to overcorrect it. Otherwise, repaying his grudges with kindness, his cowardice will only make the other party develop the habit of beating others for fun, and he will not extricate himself. The other party goes further and further, harming others and yourself, and there will be endless troubles. Therefore, moderate self-defense counterattack is also an effective way for children to educate each other.
I remember when I was a child, I forgot why my right arm was bitten by a classmate in the same village (there are still scars left). Fortunately, there was no family planning at that time, and I had many brothers and sisters. In the evening, I worked with my younger brother and sister to repair the guy on the threshing ground, and I had no war with him again (twenty years later, I heard from my hometown that the person was missing, and I still had some concerns). In addition, I have been independent since I was a child. Not that I have no friends, but I just don’t participate in the fight and quarrel games organized by the branch secretary’s children, which seems a bit unsociable. However, according to the villagers, his family has the right (don’t treat the branch secretary as a cadre), my family has knowledge (my father is a teacher), and the two adults are also polite to each other. His child even gave me a five-pointed star on the military cap that boys like (which is still a bit beautiful to me when I recall it). But there was a conflict once, and I did not obey and surrender and did not hide it and not report it after I returned home. You know, most people dare not provoke him, and no one dares to offend brigade cadres. But that night, his mother came to the door with a very good attitude and also gave her a gift. Perhaps because I never take the initiative to cause trouble, the person who argues with me is inevitably presumed to be guilty, and based on my personality inertia, I also have the burden of proving my innocence (it's really unfortunate to say that this classmate suddenly passed away last year, which is very sad).
bullying is the ugliest phenomenon in the world of children. You must fight back and cannot escape. Without courage, there is no peace of coexistence.
Why do children need to go to school? What should schools teach? Grades are very important, but going to school is definitely not just about learning book knowledge, but more importantly, growing up with teachers and classmates. Especially in elementary school, experiencing friendship and learning cooperation is a hundred times more important than each course. Although my father taught me throughout my elementary school for two years, somehow my head was like a lump of wood, and I was always unaware of my lessons and my course grades were so bad.However, the joy of getting along with my deskmate in the third and fourth grades made me experience a friendship that is different from family affection, which is quite beautiful to recall. Although I successfully entered a key high school in the middle school entrance examination and was still fifth from the bottom in the first year of high school, I met my classmates who were still in friendly contact so far (of course, for some reason, I never studied overtime outside the classroom, but suddenly made efforts in the second year of high school, and my grades remained the first in the county, and I remained the second in the city until the college entrance examination, and my grades were second in the city, far surpassing the Peking University line, and I was admitted to Southwest University School of Political Science and Law with the first place in the college entrance examination).
Adults and children seem to be not the same species. In fact, they are both humans, but most of the adults hypocritically betray their original intentions and call them maturity. It's really pedantic.
