Text | Late Stand
Source | Try our best to live (Official account: wanqingdepingtai)
A few days ago, I posted a video on Douyin , to the effect that don’t use your family’s money to post on your husband and Mother-in-law’s family. The comments under
have exploded. The discussion has not stopped yet. Curious babies can search for it themselves. Douyin account: 1792108589.
I don’t have this problem myself, because my family is poor enough, but I have seen too many such tragedies.
A famous example is: Stanley Ho, who became a gambling king through his father-in-law, married his second wife after his original wife, Lai Wanhua, got sick, and regardless of her feelings, he successively married a third and fourth wife.
There is also Hong Kong tycoon Li Ka-shing , who started his family life with the help of his first wife. After becoming a wealthy man, he brought his mistress home, causing his first wife to be pissed to death.
Such stories are not uncommon among ordinary people. Lin Shengbin and Zhu Xiaozhen made a sensation this year, Wang Nuannuan was pushed off a cliff by her husband, etc.
Of course, these are relatively extreme cases. Apart from being wary of women, they are not universal.
But in the end, there are many people who end up losing both their personal and financial resources.
Many people think that this is because men are too heartless. On the surface, this is indeed the case, but many people do not know the underlying root cause at all.
Today, I will give you a detailed analysis.
On the wedding day, no matter how different their conditions may appear to be, they are essentially equal.
Even if it is the kind of rich daughter marrying a poor boy, or a beautiful girl marrying a short and poor man, it seems that they are not a good match, but in fact they are a good match.
A poor boy must have something in him that a wealthy daughter desperately needs, such as emotional value and so on.
If one is rich and the other is good at coaxing, a balance can be maintained.
We don’t use rich people as examples. After all, most people are ordinary people. Let’s use ordinary couples as examples.
On the day you get married, the overall conditions of the two of you are actually about the same. But when you take money to support his career, you have already begun to break this balance.
When a man really succeeds in his career, this balance is completely broken.
not only breaks completely, but also rapidly ebbs and flows.
When you choose to give up your career and return to your family and let men work on their careers, your circle will shrink rapidly.
After all, a person's energy is limited. If you take care of your family, you don't have that much time to make friends outside.
To put it bluntly, even making friends requires a common language and experience.
If the other person is a business executive and you are a housewife, it will be difficult for you to talk together. After all, a combination like Luo Zijun and Tang Jing is rare.
Those you can make friends with are most likely housewives like you. Your topics will basically revolve around your children, husband, parents-in-law, sisters-in-law, etc.
These topics are unlikely to improve you, but will become a kind of internal friction.
Because many conflicts come out of talking.
For example, you originally thought that your parents-in-law were okay, but when you compared them with others, you found that your parents-in-law were much worse than others, so you became mentally unbalanced and disliked them anyway.
Because the focus is at home, you are not so concerned about managing your appearance and figure. After all, how many women can still dress themselves up like a lady at home?
Even if the financial conditions permit, sometimes the body is lazy.
When I am at home and when I go out, I am completely different. When I go out, I can put on makeup for two hours. At home, I want to wear pajamas every day. This is in line with human nature!
There is also the most important issue of ability.
Many abilities need to be used all the time. When you don't use them for a long time, your abilities will definitely degrade.
When you are in the workplace, you have to face different people every day and deal with some annoying problems. It may seem very tedious, but it constantly exercises your abilities, tolerance and emotional intelligence.
This is why many people say that women who are out of touch with society and have been struggling for a long time are really different from women who have been at home for a long time.
As a result, women have fewer and fewer advantages, and even become more disadvantaged as they go to the back.
The appearance is getting older and older, the circle is getting smaller and smaller, and the ability is getting worse and worse. The only thing he has is the piece of paper of marriage and the children he raised with his own hands.
Let’s look at men again.
When you use yourself and your natal family as a ladder for a man to rise in his career, as long as the man is still somewhat capable and motivated, not to mention very successful, he will at least be much better than he is now.
Although men are getting older, their golden years are much longer than that of women.
With social experience and years of polishing, they will show a mature charm and be more competitive than when they were in their 20s.
The key is that a successful career will give them more capital and confidence.
’s vision and knowledge are constantly improving. Even if they are not flirtatious, there will be many young girls who want to take shortcuts and make secret glances at them.
One is a young, lively, admiring little girl, and the other is a wife who is out of shape and no longer attractive.
Once or twice, of course they can rely on responsibility and conscience to restrain themselves, but what about over the years? How many men can do this?
Because this is anti-humanity.
He needs to tell himself every day:
My wife is kind to me, and I can't be sorry to her.
Let me tell you, after a long time, men will feel wronged and even angry.
Don’t ask me why I know this, because the cases I have come across range from ten thousand to eight thousand.
A couple, one has been on the decline, the other has been on the rise. The gap is becoming more and more obvious. Can conscience and responsibility alone be maintained?
is difficult.
Because this depends on the man constantly fighting against external temptations and constantly fighting against his own heart. As long as one day he doesn't want to fight anymore, the woman will be in tragedy.
This is why many women are eventually dumped, either by men, by outsiders, or by themselves.
Finally, I want to tell all sisters, whether we admit it or not, men have more innate advantages than women. At least they don’t have to give birth to children for confinement.
The only way we can make ourselves invincible is to improve our own value and achieve rapid self-improvement. After all, relying on no one is worse than relying on yourself, right?
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Late Stand, million-selling author, founder of Yun Yixuan Jewelry, dedicated to women's self-growth, new book "The More Self-Discipline the More Free" is currently selling, and the representative work "Being a Just Right Woman", Weibo : The little nest of late love, public platform: live life with all our strength, ID: wanqingdepingtai
