Today's Women's News "Knowing Women Pictures" column
Where there are Chinese people, there is Tsai Chin singing. She is an evergreen tree in the Chinese music scene. She debuted for more than 40 years and sang thousands of love songs, from "The Last Night", "Just Like Your Tenderness" to "New Love", " Forgotten Time "... She The song is like a lily in full bloom, soothing countless lonely ears.
Some people say that Tsai Qin's songs are suitable for listening late at night. She has the most beautiful mezzo-soprano in the Chinese world. She is as honest and gentle as black velvet, graceful and graceful, and exudes the meaning of outside the strings. She is vaguely lonely and slightly sentimental.
In fact, her real life is hidden in this unhurried, neither humble nor arrogant singing.
A woman's maturity is absolutely inseparable from the ripening agent of love. Cai Qin has a mature temperament very early, one is determined by the innate sound quality, and the other is the nourishment of love. The man who made the arrogant Cai Qin fall in love was called Yang Dechang, the master of the movie who was later famous in the world.
However, when they first met, Yang Dechang had not yet become the "scalpel of Taiwanese society", but Cai Qin had been famous for 5 years. The two became attached because of the movie.
Yang Dechang was 10 years older than her and had a marriage . He was deeply attracted by Cai Qin's singing skills and talent, and pursued her fiercely. At the same time, Yang Dechang's rich experience and compelling talent also made 27-year-old Cai Qin's heart beat. The two talented people came together because of mutual appreciation.
After being in love for a year, Cai Qin felt that it was time to talk about marriage, but Yang Dechang didn't respond, and she suffered a lot.
One day, when she returned home from where she was singing, her friend Yuan Qiongqiong recalled: "Cai Qin told me that she couldn't stand it, and she had given Yang Dechang an ultimatum. If the man did not give her a clear position, she would She was about to leave... She was scared to death. Before she went to the restaurant, she told Yang Dechang to leave a message on her answering machine when he figured it out."
There was no sound when he pressed the answering machine. . After a long silence, there was a long sigh: "What did you tell me to say?" This was all Yang Dechang's answer.
Cai Qin went to Yang Dechang's house, "In the dark night, Yang Dechang came out to open the door, his tall and thin figure obscured Cai Qin. He circled the light blue girl into his wrist and closed the red lacquered door of his house. ".
In 1985, they finally got married, but Yang Dechang made a bizarre suggestion. He said: "We should maintain Platonic communication, and let this relationship not be mixed with any impurities and not be bound by any constraints. Because our careers have yet to be developed. , we must put our energy into work together.”
is incredible, Cai Qin readily agreed to this “Platonic communication”.
So, during the day, they were in love, and she invited the biggest names in the literary and art circles from the living room to cultivate his contacts; she played guest roles in his films, sang songs, and even worked as an artist and drama , becoming ubiquitous in his films landscape. At night, they sleep in separate beds, even in Taipei, Hong Kong, and New York, and live a sexless marriage. During the ten years of their marriage, they both reached the peak of their careers. Yang Dechang made famous films such as " terrorist ", "Guling Street Teenage Murder Case" , and became a world-class figure.
Yang Dechang hasn't touched Cai Qin for ten years, and she longs for a normal married life, but is as arrogant as she is, and successful as she is, and she can only force tears into her stomach with a smile. Yang Dechang's scandal spread to Cai Qin's ears from time to time, but she buried her head in the sand like an ostrich, until Yang Dechang personally confronted her.
In 1995, Yang Dechang admitted that he fell in love with Peng Kaili, a female pianist 18 years younger than him, and said that "ten years of marriage has been blank", Cai Qin burst into tears: "I don't think it's blank, I have all the sacrifices." She Exiting this love triangle in a big way, just as she promised "sexless marriage", she will always be too sensible and tolerant, and never entangle.
Later, Yang Dechang gave birth to two sons in a row, and a man who never touched Cai Qin released all his passion in other women. In 2007, Yang Dechang died of illness. Cai Qin cried in the room for a day, regretting that "I knew his life was short, I was willing to divorce him earlier and let him enjoy his life."
Cai Qin's face has a mole of tears, and the love of a lifetime is also connected with tears. During ten years of sexless marriage, she was depressed and sad, and the days that followed were spent in long loneliness, longing and mourning. She released all the feelings that could not be expressed in reality in her voice, brewed pots of wine of the years, and soothed the fragile feelings of urban men and women.
Yang Dechang's death made the two's secret "sexless marriage" public, causing an uproar.
We can't blame the morality and right and wrong among them. They are combined because of their talents. They are always wandering in the embarrassment of being a little more than friends and a little less than lovers , one loves not deep enough, and one loves too reserved. They couldn't break through the status quo, so fell into 's "marriage cooperatives" that did not premise on sex.
Cai Qin once said frankly that "love has handed over no papers, and she will never be someone else's wife again in her life", which shows the harm that sexless marriage has done to her throughout her life.
Those who are as wise as Tsai Chin, and who sing love songs like Tsai Chin, are still caught in the hidden danger of marriage, and she is just the tip of the iceberg of the "sexless marriage" army. There are not a few women who are deeply caught in this door in life. They are either too rational and proud, or too reserved and passive in the face of feelings, and the relationship between husband and wife has come to a standstill.
In fact, there is no such thing as a strong person in a marriage. It is often the one who wins the truth but loses the relationship, earns self-esteem and loses the heart. It is better to show weakness wisely, show friendship bravely, and manage a long-lasting marriage with a delicate heart. .
text / Chen Xiaodan
editor: Chen Dazui
