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client description:
We are college classmates, and after work, we met each other again at a company meeting. There is almost nothing to talk about later, because in the same city, the two companies occasionally have business dealings. I am the middle-level company, and he is also a small leader in his company. We meet every weekend, but in the past month, he always says he doesn't want to see me if he has something to do, and he stammers on WeChat. I learned through his company that he has encountered problems at work recently because of his mistakes in work, and he also needs to compensate for some of the losses. But no matter how I asked him, he didn't tell the truth and even began to alienate me. What should I do if he refused my help and company many times?
Thanks for your trust in Xinrong Youdao Psychological Studio~
Some people say that boys should be strong and do not need company. Many girls always complain that boys are not caring enough, not caring enough, not careful enough, not heartwarming enough, and not good enough for boys.
But girls, Love is a matter between two people, love is not a request. Love is giving, what have you given for him? When he was poor, not everyone was born with a golden key in his mouth, and not everyone was rich so smoothly. When a man is poor, he hopes that there is a woman who can support him and accompany him to overcome difficulties. The sun always comes after the storm. If a woman leaves when a man is most helpless, then the man will not have any nostalgia for you.
When he has a breakthrough in his career, men are animals that especially need a sense of conquest and accomplishment. He must hope that his image in your mind is tall and he desires to be admired by you, and that will make you feel satisfied.
So, when a man makes a breakthrough in his career, he must hope that you can be by his side. This is how men are. It is a very happy thing to hope that the woman he loves can understand his achievements and make his woman depend on him.
When he is under pressure alone and encounters difficulties, the man who loves you will hide something from you. He always reports good news but not bad news. He does not want you to add unnecessary troubles because of his affairs. When a man is alone outside, he is actually very lonely. He needs your support at this moment, but he cannot tell you completely because he knows that after telling you, your mood will also be affected. A man seems to be very strong, but in fact he is very fragile inside. He just pretends to be calm and acts strong. The more he does this, the more he needs your company, and I hope you can understand this.
When a man is in a low mood or encounters a problem, Most men will choose women to accompany him silently, showing that they have confidence in him. Within the range where he can call, he can confide in you, hug you, and feel the gentleness of a lady, which can make him quiet, relax and temporarily relieve himself.
When the other party does not tell the truth or even begins to alienate you, and refuses your help and company many times, you need to give the other party a free space to be alone and believe that the other party has the ability to get out of the predicament. At this time, you are as you usually do, maintain independence, elegance and confidence, and enrich your spare time, and slowly, the other person will bounce back to you like a rubber band~
In addition, you can encourage him at the right time. When people are in a low mood and encounter various setbacks, they often cannot remember their excellent aspects. So when you talk to you, you should appropriately remind him of his strengths, and the way he took when he encountered similar situations before may inspire him. This praise or encouragement must be specific.
Another thing to remind you is to encourage cheerful tone in terms of tone. Remember not to give it a feeling that this matter is easy to solve, or that this is not a problem at all.
Third, it is recommended to minimize the words in front of him. When a man encounters difficulties or difficulties, he is reluctant or dislikes a girl to teach him how to do it, or tell him how to do it. This will give the man a feeling of looking down on him, so he will dislike you and will not talk to you about anything, which will also affect the relationship between you and him.
A man can tell you that he is depressed, etc., which means that you are worthy of his trust. This is a good phenomenon. He always tells you that you can also express to him like this, " Dear, I understand your feelings in particular. So many things have happened recently, and I am also very sad to see you are so sad. I hope these things will improve quickly, and I can see you happy. I also want to do something for you now, but I am not sure what I should do, can I do something for you? " and so on.
Remember: Good love and marriage both need to be managed, and love is also a kind of ability that can be learned! Xinrong Youdao is happy and worry-free~
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Xinrong Youdao is committed to family therapy, marriage and love emotions and interpersonal communication · Psychological consultation and treatment
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