As the saying goes: Great energy harms the body. Some people have a frustrated temper and get angry at all times. Sometimes they feel particularly regretful after being angry about something or someone, but they just can't control their emotions at that time.
In fact, in real life, we really get angry at all times? I saw that my child didn’t finish my homework; my husband kept playing with his mobile phone before going to bed; I was in a mess after dinner, no one cared about it; although the unit’s evaluation was excellent, I was not selected, etc., this may lead to bad emotions.
In the book "Emotions: Variables that Influence Correct Decisions", it says that emotions are subjectively constructed by the human brain, and are innate human talents. They are variables that affect our correct decisions.
The author is Lenard Monlodino from the United States. He is the co-author of Hawking "A Brief History of Time " and a story-telling scientific writer.
A good adjustment of human emotions will have many benefits for both psychology and physiology. However, there are not many ways to really effectively regulate your emotions.
In order to better manage emotions, this book provides us with three effective methods, namely acceptance, reevaluation and expression.
is accepted. This is the core practice of the Stoic school. Tell us not to react emotionally to things that we cannot control and learn to accept.
Stoic philosophy is to let you control your life and know how to work hard on things that you are capable of completing or changing, and not waste your energy on things that you can do powerlessly.
For example, if we go for a picnic and encounter a rainy day, we will definitely not have fun. Even so, we should not be angry. The reason is that there is nothing we can do about it when it rains. In addition, if someone is very harsh on us, we are often very angry. However, you must know that we cannot control and change those who are harsh on us. Therefore, it is also stupid to be angry on us.
If you accept the "worst" situation that may occur, and only focus on what you can do and deal with it in a positive way, you can gradually reduce a lot of emotional pain. In this way, emotions bring you motivation and strength, and will not destroy you.
The second is to re-evaluate. Once something makes you anxious, when you have the ability to choose how you understand the environment, events and experiences in your life, you might as well change your resentment or anxiety and understand it from another perspective.
By changing the brain's understanding of things, you can effectively shorten the vicious cycle that leads to unhappy emotions. This guiding thinking is "re-evaluation".
For example, if you are late for a meeting, don’t feel too guilty for being late. You can think: “Even if I am late, everyone won’t care.” Or “Others won’t mind because they know I am usually on time.”
If you think about the problem from a different perspective, your negative state will be alleviated. Although it will not drive away all negative emotions, as your thinking changes, your negative way of looking at things will also be alleviated.
is the expression. If you feel very angry, such as grievances, unfair treatment, etc., it is recommended that you express your feelings through conversation and writing, and the person you tell them must be the person you trust, or the person you think is very important.
by telling, express negative emotions and solve emotional problems, which will gradually weaken the anger until it disappears.
The premise of doing this is that your listener should listen attentively. If the listener is not focused, but is absent-minded, or has no time to listen to you, the effect of expressing emotions will be counterproductive.
Shakespeare said that if you don’t say it, you will always whisper with your overwhelmed heart until it becomes fragmented. What he means is that as long as you express your sad emotions, you will be liberated in your heart.
Emotional management is indeed very critical to our lives and work.
often can’t control your emotions. You might as well try the above three methods, which will be very helpful for your emotional management.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-