2023, cherish, let go, keep
----Written to my son and daughter-in-law
My dear child:
We are very lucky, we are not Yang yet. Watching you cook, clean, and run at night through the screen every day is full of joy.
You two are both teachers. In the new year, as your peers, my mother sends this letter, wishing your lives to be as bright and beautiful as poetry.
Cherish those who give you advice
When I first worked in a middle school, the middle school and high school Chinese teachers would listen to the same class every time during the teaching and research activities, and they would evaluate the class after each class. This is related to the working style of the teaching and research team leader. He encourages everyone to put forward opinions and debates, saying that this is good for young teachers. The conference room is often filled with smoke, and it is common to get red-faced over a certain point. And I benefited a lot from this real teaching and research atmosphere.
Later, when I became the leader of the teaching and research team and the director of the teaching department, I also encouraged everyone to put forward their opinions and suggestions after listening to the class. I often took the lead in making the first suggestions. I always felt that this was true care for young teachers. Now that I think about it, many times it was wishful thinking on my part: I would chase after others for advice when I gave good public classes, but not everyone may be so willing to be criticized by others.
The current atmosphere of teaching and research is different from that in the past. Many times the lectures will be dismissed, or very few people will actually offer opinions and suggestions. Even if you make such a small suggestion, you have to carefully consider the wording: "This is already perfect, that, I am just talking nonsense, it is very immature, a small suggestion, oh, if..."
I understand very well, I am afraid of offending people. Good medicine tastes bitter, but if you sincerely do good for others, you may be made uncomfortable by others. Still, don’t say it.
Because of this, I feel very lucky to have lived in a teaching and research atmosphere where everyone discussed matters and spoke out.
Dear children, now you have many opportunities to hold open classes at all levels. After each class, you are very happy to hear everyone's unanimous praise, and I am also happy for you. I also want to ask you to keep a clear head. No one is perfect in this world, and there are no perfect lessons. Nowadays, many open classes gather the wisdom of everyone and polish them over and over again to almost perfection, and finally perform them grandly. This is abnormal, because we usually cannot produce such precision in every class. We must be self-aware and not be carried away by the so-called perfection.
How valuable it is to have different voices in the midst of praise! The speaker of this voice has probably not been beaten by life, and still maintains the sincere heart of "I want to be sincerely good for you." The speaker of this voice may be someone like me who has had a teaching and research atmosphere where you talk to each other and continue to make progress, and he will treat you sincerely in this way.
Maybe the weakness of human nature is not to see others being better than oneself, but there are indeed people in this world who sincerely hope that others will be better. Because of this, they shine like treasures. If you really look for them, you will definitely see them in the crowd at a glance.
Sometimes this precious advisor is your student. If one day, you teach a class and ask students to do corresponding exercises, and some people make many mistakes, and when you call them, they find that they did not understand your explanation and were confused. At this time, do not get angry and blame the students for being sloppy and not serious in listening to the class. In the process of explaining it to the students again, you will find that you are just like polishing an open class. How can you explain it more easily and understandably? Prepare and present your usual classes as if they were open classes. What you are polishing is not the class, but your own educational life.
Let go of the things that trip you up.
Life is full of wind and rain, muddy and slippery. When 2022 first arrived, I saw a fortune-telling software on the Internet, and out of curiosity I went to see my overall fortune in 2022.It’s funny to say, but among a bunch of empty talk, there is only one sentence that is somewhat real, which attracted my special attention: Hands and feet will be easily injured in 2022, so be careful.
I don’t know it until I see it, but I often remember it after reading it. Sure enough, in 2022, my left knee was broken twice due to falls, and my hands were cut and bleeding countless times.
It wasn’t until December 31, 2022 that I breathed a sigh of relief. In 2022, so many painful and speechless things have happened, but none of them are as good as this fortune-telling sentence that makes me frightened and cautious every day.
In fact, as long as you do things, skin and flesh injuries are inevitable. As long as you do something, you will be reviled and even praised by everyone. This has been unavoidable since ancient times. This is the tragedy of a working person, and only you know what it feels like.
Dear children, in your more than 20 years of life, you should have experienced the pain and loneliness of working people. From a small school, you may not be praised for your hard work in cooking, and you may even be picked on; from a middle school, teaching seriously may not be popular with students and parents in the end, and a small report may make your blood freeze with chills; from a big school, we have all been to the emergency room of the hospital, and we have all seen the depression of doctors who are surrounded by people but do not say a word and focus on saving people. Looking at the bigger picture, it can no longer be expressed in words. The only thing
can do is to let go.
was talking to the students about the charm of Chinese characters that day, and talked about "home" and "grave". This small dot, above and below, is a world of difference between the joy and warmth of life and the sadness and coldness.
If the things that hold us back are just a small dot, if we hold it close to our heart, it will always fall like a heavy stone in our blood vessels, heart, and mind. How can we dare to do things boldly? It will kill our enthusiasm and fetter our courage.
Hui is like Su Shi , this "point" is stewed with sugar, salt and fragrance to become Dongpo pork ; Wisdom is like Fan Zhongyan , living too tired with worry, slander, fear and ridicule, only by not being happy with things and not being sad with yourself can you pretend to be "the world".
Dear child, life is an experience. As a human being in this life, try to be an excellent person. When you walk in the mighty spring breeze, there will be small flying insects buzzing. Don't let their noise prevent you from appreciating the beautiful spring.
Maintain a kind, compassionate and tenacious heart
This is really the most difficult thing! Bullets are flying in the sky, and the truth of many things is unknown. The complexity of human nature will always exceed the precision that machines can achieve. The world is a kaleidoscope, and it will look completely different in the blink of an eye.
But don’t sigh and panic because of this. Never jump to conclusions or express your opinion too quickly. One plus one is definitely equal to two in some cases, but in other cases one plus one may be less than two or greater than two.
People in the world are standing in the rapidly flowing river. Those who follow the turbulent current lose themselves, and those who go upstream can hardly move forward. My dear child, a kind, compassionate and tenacious heart will make you a pillar of strength.
The world seems very big, but in fact sometimes it is as small as your classroom and a desk; the world seems to be full of people, but in fact sometimes it is just you and a group of students; the world seems very complicated, but in fact sometimes it is as simple as a teacher-student conversation in one class.
You can do as many things as you have the ability. Kindness and compassion will bring soft warmth to what you do. The chef cooks with gratitude to the customers, and considers the taste of the eater with every grain of salt; the mother cooks with love for her children, and considers the preferences of her relatives with every shovelful of stir-fry.
We are all passers-by in this chaotic world, and our appearance will age in a blink of an eye. No one will be immortal, but a kind, compassionate and tenacious heart will give you infinite power to overcome all the turbulent waves that come your way.
Dear children, since you came to this world, you must accept all the noise and noise in this world.Do something that you love and that is of some benefit to the world, and accept the consequences no matter what. Don't get carried away when you are proud, and don't get depressed when you are frustrated. Kindness is a melancholy floral fragrance. If you carry it in your heart, noble people and luck will come to you across mountains and rivers.
My dear child, cherish those who treat you sincerely, let go of those things that stick in your heart, and keep a kind, compassionate and tenacious heart. The four seasons of spring, summer, autumn and winter reincarnate, everything happens naturally. Whether your life is profound or not is not important; whether it is unique or not is not important; what is important is to stick to simple common sense: kindness and compassion.
2023, as always, love you all.
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