Children grow up from being ignorant to being sensible. When they are young, children often do wrong things, and parents may not be able to help but be cruel to their children, get angry with them, or even beat and scold them.
However, children will also be frightened to tears by such a sudden reaction from their parents. At this time, the baby will cry loudly while reaching out to the parents for a hug.
Seeing their children crying so heartbreakingly, many parents felt helpless and felt sorry for their children, and immediately picked up their children to comfort them. However, some parents were very "principled" and ruthlessly refused their children's requests.
Why does a child still ask his mother for a hug after being scolded and crying? Maybe you won't want to yell at your children after reading this.
01
Children are afraid that their mothers do not love them.
For children, their mothers are their most trusted support. Children love their mothers far more than their mothers imagine. No matter how cruel their mothers are to their children, their children still love their mothers.
Because the child is young and spends the longest time with his mother, when the child sees his mother angry, he will feel a sense of crisis and be afraid that his mother will not love him.
Hugging is a way for children to have skin-to-skin contact with their mother to relieve their inner uneasiness. Hugging can also make children feel more secure.
Therefore, even if a child is scolded and cried by his mother, he will still take the initiative to ask for forgiveness and a hug.
02
The child is afraid that if he does something wrong, his mother will not want him.
The child does something wrong and asks for forgiveness from his mother. He also knows that he has done something wrong and made his mother angry. At the same time, he is also afraid that his mother will not want him and will abandon him.
Because many times, parents will joke with their children and say "I don't want you", and the children may take it seriously.
When the child sees his mother’s angry reaction again, the child will subconsciously feel less secure and more afraid.
At this time, people will show uneasiness, fear and other emotions in their hearts, so they can only use softness to ask for forgiveness.
03
The child is asking for forgiveness.
Children are smart. When they do something wrong, they will know that their mother’s reaction is different from usual, and they will know that their mother is angry. If they see their mother being reticent, the baby will also want to coax her.
Past experience tells them that when he reaches out for a hug, his mother's tone and face will change, so they think this is a good way to please his mother and admit his mistakes.
The baby also knows that his mother is working hard and feels sorry for her, so he will take the initiative to realize his mistakes, beg for forgiveness and a hug from his mother.
The baby needs a hug, and the mother should respond promptly. It is very important not to ignore it!
A mother said: When her baby does something wrong and asks for a hug, she will not push the child away deliberately, but will hug the child and wait until the child calms down before correcting the child's mistake. The mother also said, "Not holding the child should never be used as a way to punish the child."
I agree. If it were me, I would do the same thing, because when the child cries and the mother refuses to hold the child, the only signal the child receives is "Mom is angry." At this time, no matter how much the mother talks to the child, the child will not listen.
Therefore, if the baby needs a hug, the mother should respond in time and wait until the child calms down before handling the matter, so that the child can listen better. It is very important not to ignore it!
will affect the development of the child's brain
American children's health consultant Dosali Lechesk's theory: Infants and young children have a very strong need for mutual contact and touch. "Skin-to-skin contact" actually has a decisive impact on physical development, brain development and emotional development, especially the development of the brain.
When the baby hugs the mother, the skin-to-skin contact can bring them closer, and at the same time it can warm the baby, making the baby feel more secure and become braver and more confident.
Children can overcome doubts
When a baby cries, his heart is very sensitive and fragile. If the mother refuses to hold the baby at this time, the baby may become more fearful and insecure, and it may even affect the child's mental health.
On the contrary, if the mother holds the child, waits for the child to calm down, and then patiently reasons with the child, it will send a message to the child, "Although you made a mistake, mother still loves you and will not abandon you." It can also reduce the child's uneasiness and overcome doubts.
Children have a stronger sense of happiness
When the child does something wrong, the mother refuses to hug the child, which may shock the child and even affect the parent-child relationship, making the child unwilling to open up to himself or communicate with you in the future.
When children grow up, they will encounter mistakes. If parents think about the problem from the child's perspective, they may be able to understand their children. Sometimes they do not intentionally cause trouble, but they learn to grow from their mistakes.
If parents can patiently reason with their children instead of losing their temper or treating them coldly, then the children's happiness will be stronger.
If your child cries after being scolded by you and asks for a hug, will you hug him?
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