Yesterday, when talking to a friend about her recent book, she said, "I have dug out "Six Records of the Floating Life". Even Mr. Lu Xun, who has always been sarcastic, said bluntly, "Although she is not Xi Shi's face and has slightly exposed her teeth, she is the number one beau

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Yesterday, when talking to a friend about the book I read recently, she said, "I dug out " Six Records of Life ". Every time I see Yunniang being seriously ill but being expelled from my in-laws, I feel very sad.

The Yunniang in Shen Fu is straightforward and lively, intelligent and virtuous, full of life interest. She is called the cutest woman in Chinese literature by Mr. Lin Yutang .

Even Mr. Lu Xun, who has always been a sarcastic man, said bluntly, "Although she is not in the face of Xishi and has slightly exposed her teeth, she is the number one beauty in China."

Such a beautiful woman should be a blessing in life no matter who she meets. As a result, she ended up being rejected by her in-laws and even driven away.

Alas, she and Shen Fu have a deep affection. If she doesn't live with her in-laws, will she live her life happily and leisurely? "

After hearing what my friend said, I was silent for a long time.

In real life, there are too many women like Yun Niang, who are kind-hearted, filial and kind, and have a gentle temperament. But it is precisely because they are too understanding and are especially generous in the following two things, which has laid the root of their marriage.

conflicts occur, and when unfair treatment and misunderstanding are encountered

The barrier between Yunniang and her in-laws actually stems from a small matter. At that time, Shen Fu and his father were away all year round. One day, his father said that since Yunniang could read and write, she would write a letter for her mother-in-law from now on.

As a result, good times didn't last long, and gossip came from home. My mother-in-law suspected that Yunniang was not clear about her narrative and was not strict with her, so she stopped asking her to write for herself.

When Shen Fu's father saw that the letter from the family was not Yunniang's handwriting, he felt very unhappy and thought that Yunniang was lazy and disdainful of writing.

Little did they know that this was actually Shen Fu's younger brother and sister-in-law coveted their family property and secretly slandered and plotted against his brother and sister-in-law. But there are signs of ill-heartedness between my brother-in-law and his wife.

Although Shen Fu is the eldest son in the family, he is in the family, so the Shen family has always called Yunniang "Sanniang". But later, the name she was suddenly called "third wife".

You should know that in the Ming and Qing dynasties, the word "wife" specifically refers to the wives of first- and second-rank officials, and ordinary people cannot call them wives. Therefore, it is inappropriate to put it on Yunniang.

How can a smart woman like Yunniang not know who is causing trouble behind her back? But she chose to swallow her anger and let it go, and was unwilling to worry about the harmony.

But others think she is easy to bully and make trouble between her and her in-laws with greed. So, this letter writing incident occurred.

result Yunniang was probably too kind. When Shen Fu understood the whole story, she wanted to explain it to his father. Yunniang quickly stopped her and said that she would rather be condemned by her father-in-law than to upset her mother-in-law.

Alas, she thought she was considering her parents-in-law and wanted to make big things smaller, but small things smaller. But many times, just swallowing your anger and not refuting yourself will only make the conflict between the two sides deeper and worse, making things worse.

So, when getting along with your in-laws, if you are treated unfairly or be wrongly blamed, don’t always pretend to be generous and say it’s okay or keep it silent in your heart even though you are so uncomfortable. Such compromise and tolerance as

cannot be exchanged for others' gratitude, and no one will miss you. It’s better to put the matter on the surface and say it straightforwardly.

When the in-laws asks for help,

If the letter writing incident only lays a root in Yunniang's parents-in-law's heart, then the two things that happened next directly led to Yunniang's disgust and hated by her in-laws, laying the groundwork for her expulsion from the house.

The first is that Shen Fu's father wanted to take a concubine, but he was embarrassed to speak to his wife. He then asked someone to hint Shen Fu that if he was filial, he would find a woman from his hometown who was familiar with the local accent to serve his father's daily life.

So, Shen Fu asked Yunniang to find a suitable woman for her father. Logically speaking, a smart woman like Yunniang should understand that this is not something she should interfere.

Unexpectedly, she actually started to do it with her mother-in-law without telling her, and took the woman to her home for a fun trip.After being caught by her mother-in-law, Yunniang said she was just coming to play at home.

It was not until the woman became her father-in-law’s concubine that the mother-in-law knew the truth. It can be imagined that she must have hated Yunniang in her heart.

The second is that Shen Fu's younger brother borrowed money from someone else and asked Yunniang to be the guarantor. As a result, my brother-in-law was reluctant to pay off his debts until he was found by the creditor.

Yunniang tells the truth, but her brother-in-law is acting like a scoundrel and refuses to admit it. As a result, his father-in-law was furious and believed that Yunniang slandered her brother-in-law and rebelled against her in-laws, so he drove Shen Fu and Yunniang out of the house.

So, the life of the in-laws is to keep meddling in other people's business. Don't make yourself tired and difficult to please others. It's not worth it.

Because many times, your hard work and kindness cannot be exchanged for others' gratitude and appreciation, but it is easy to be out of the world.

Finally, I want to say that the rest of my life is too short and the future is not long. Less idle and less idle. But do good things and don't save others.

Don’t be too generous, live your life well, and leave kindness to those who understand you and cherish you.

Senior nanny, psychological counselor, author of original parenting comic articles,

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