What is it like to have only one daughter? Someone gave an extremely insightful answer: "The first half of my life is enjoyable, and the second half is lonely.

What is the experience of having only one daughter?

Someone gave an extremely insightful answer: "The first half of life is enjoyable, the second half of life is lonely."

When my daughter was not yet adult, her parents devoted all her efforts to her daughter and spoiled her in her palm. Mingzhu, this high-quality raising often makes the family more closely related and enjoys a wonderful parent-child time;

When the children get married and start their own small family, the parents are at home alone. The more feelings they give in front, the more reluctant they will feel and the deeper they miss, and their later years may be a little lonely in comparison.

The pictures in this article are all from the Internet, and the pictures and texts are irrelevant to

"If you only have one daughter, should you live alone to die?"

Xiqi is an only child. At that time, her parents actively responded to family planning and took pride in "giving only one".

Everyone around persuaded Qianxi's parents to leave a way out for their future retirement, but they both disagree. They felt that only one daughter would have less pressure to raise and could accompany their daughter to grow up more attentively.

But as her daughter grows up, the couple began to slowly realize the disadvantages...

I still remember the first time I parted with my daughter. When she was in college, her daughter, who had always been in high spirits, chose to go to a better school in other provinces. Although the parents were reluctant to leave, they still let go for the future of their children.

"I didn't expect that this will last for six or seven years!"

After the child went to college, he found a job in a local foreign company. The couple persuaded their daughter to go back to their hometown to be a teacher or take the civil service exam, so that they were closer and their work was stable.

But my daughter felt that she had finally gained a foothold in a big city and was very unwilling to go back.

She and her parents quarreled over this matter countless times, but in the end they compromised, which resulted in a long separation. Her daughter only returned home during the Chinese New Year and left for less than a week each time.

After persisting for a few years, it was heard that my daughter found a local person and planned to get married. The parents tried their best to stop it. The couple could not accept the fact that the only daughter in the family wanted to marry far away. They had never met their daughter many times in the past few years, let alone talk about it after getting married and having children, but in the end they could not resist their daughter's persistence.

"Originally, I thought I would let my Qianxi get married in a grand manner in the future, but in the end I could only watch her out in the hotel. I only gave birth to one daughter, should I live alone to die in my old age?"

After Xixi's father returned home, he looked at the empty house and said uncomfortable, while Qianxi's mother looked at her husband's appearance and wiped her tears.

After reading the situation of Qianxi's family, I felt extremely sad. The "princess" I carefully trained has not been seen for a year after marrying far away. I don't say that I can't see each other for a year, and I don't have other children to accompany me. I will be particularly sad when facing an empty home. And these endings are indeed easy for only families to face.

families have only daughters, and the elderly may face two situations in their later years

. It is difficult for a family to reunite during festivals and festivals

In the traditional Chinese concept, it is a blessing to be able to reunite with a family.

But for an only daughter family, reunion has become a very luxurious thing after the daughter gets married. Especially for families like Xixi, they may not meet once a year.

In recent years, small accidents have occurred from time to time, and it is even more difficult for parents to meet their children. I saw a blogger marrying abroad. Because of a mask, I haven't seen her mother for several years.

When the situation was a little relaxed, she took the child home, and the parents came to pick him up. The mother and daughter looked at each other and then hugged each other and cried. This scene made people extremely sad.

Everyone knows that happiness will not last long. After getting together for a while, the daughter will go overseas again. The laughter and joy of the past will leave deeper regrets for her parents.

During the holidays, they just watched other people's family reunion. Their home was deserted and their parents needed company in their later years. This contrast was also cruel to them.

. Parents have great pressure to retire

There are only two types of family retirement models in China:

10

11 is to accompany their parents and take care of their daily life; the other is to choose to send their parents to a nursing home so that they can spend their old age in peace.

But whether it is to contribute money or effort, it may be difficult for some only-born families.

After my daughter got married, she formed her own small family. She was busy going to work and dealing with family trivial matters every day. The number of times she could take time to go home was limited. If you bring your parents to your home, your parents may be uncomfortable. After all, your son-in-law is not a son, and you will always worry that the other party will feel uncomfortable.

As the elderly are old, they will inevitably experience headaches, fever, bumps and bumps. Sometimes they don’t want to bother their children, often report good news but not bad news. There will be a "information difference" between them and their daughter. The other party cannot detect the discomfort of their parents in time, and sometimes their health will become more and more serious.

There is a big sister in my hometown community like this. She always refuses to go for a physical examination without hiding her daughter. She always says she is in good health, but she suddenly had a stroke the year before yesterday and her daughter regrets it.

In the end, parents can only be sent to nursing homes. Although there are people to take care of them, they are not more caring than their children. In addition, the annual pension and hospitalization fees are also quite a lot of money, which may be more difficult for some women.

Further reading: How should an only girl family respond?

talks about the embarrassing situations that these families with only one-child families may face. So let’s talk about what measures we have to deal with in advance to avoid being panic at that time.

For the only daughter:

. Have time to accompany your parents and be filial. Because of the limited time of companionship, we should cherish the time we spent with our parents, go home and visit the elderly more when we have time, or contact them more often to understand their daily dynamics.

. Live well and work hard to make money. Sometimes you can live a good life outside, which is the greatest comfort to your parents. So eat well and live well, so that parents can worry less.

In addition, when you are young, you must work hard to make money, so that you can have the confidence to provide good pension conditions for your parents, and even if you get married, you will have the confidence to take good care of your parents.

For parents:

A: Exercise well and take care of your health. The body is the capital. Only when you are healthy can you reduce a lot of burden to your daughter, which can also allow them to work with peace of mind outside and feel less guilty.

B: Save your pension capital in advance just in case. This is more realistic. Not all children have conscience. Although "old but not raised" sounds cruel, it is the norm for many families.

So we should try our best to save our pension capital for ourselves and make the worst plans when we have the ability to make money.