Those who make friends with power will be defeated;
Author: Insightyy
Writer Su Qin once said: "You don't have to invite too many people into your life."
The number of people in your circle of friends is not always the better.
If you don't filter, being with negative friends will only make your life more crowded.
The sooner you stay away from those who consume you, the clearer and more self-disciplined you will be.
1
Food and wine friends: a waste of life
"Zengguang Xianwen" has a saying: "With tea and wine, there are many brothers, and there is no one in a pinch." , abandon you.
Singer Tengger used to like drinking very much, and would have a few drinks with friends every once in a while.
Later, when his song " Mongolians " became a hit, his appearance fees once reached hundreds of thousands, and his wallet bulged.
So the drinking friends around him began to encourage Tengger to establish the "Beer Association" and promoted him to the high position of chairman of the association.
Then they suggested that Tengger invest in opening a restaurant to facilitate everyone's gathering.
Once again, he drank in a restaurant until he was very drunk before going home.
When his wife saw that he was drunk, she couldn't help complaining that he neglected the family and fooled around outside all day long.
Tengger refuted her, saying that drinking with drinking friends was the only happiness in his life.
When his wife saw that he was unrepentant, she divorced him out of frustration.
Just when he felt wanton and happy, drinking all night without fear of being scolded, a crisis was quietly brewing.
Not long after, the restaurant went out of business because of the people who stayed there all year round to eat and drink for free.
As the saying goes: "In a moment of drunkenness, the bluestone desk will be destroyed in ten years."
In this way, Tengger's marriage was broken up, and many years of savings were squandered.
The originally strong Mongolian man’s body was also in decline, and his blood pressure and blood sugar all turned red.
Hang around with your fair-weather friends. Every sip of wine you drink is poison that destroys your life. While
brings you pleasure, it is also quietly paralyzing you, and may even consume your health and destroy your family.
Invite them out of your circle of friends in time and live a regular and healthy life, so that you can pursue the true happiness in life.
2
Snobbish friends: cut off all the benefits.
Master of Chinese StudiesNan HuaijinI have met many people in my life. There are friends who are sincere and courageous, and there are also snobbish people.
After experiencing the world, he lamented in the article:
Snobbishness is the norm when people interact with each other. Those who use power to make friends will be defeated; those who use benefits to make friends will be scattered.
"The Biography of Su Dongpo" tells an experience of Su Shi , which is embarrassing.
When Su Shi was in the capital, many people came to fawn over him.
Every time he went in and out of the restaurant poetry club, there were a lot of people following him.
There is a person named Zhang Hong. He and Su Shi were Jinshi in the same year.
At that time, Su Shi was deeply appreciated and valued by Ouyang Xiu, but Zhang Hong was still unknown and had no hope of promotion, so he began to deliberately make friends with Su Shi.
When Su Shi was working at Fengxiang, he had a disagreement with his boss Chen Xiliang, and the situation became very tense.
Zhang Hong learned the news and took the initiative to help him resolve the conflict.
Su Shi was so moved that when he returned to Beijing, he personally wrote a "Shuo Shuo" and gave it to him.
Unexpectedly, the Wutai Poetry Case broke out later, and Su Shi was imprisoned.
When Zhang Hong saw this, he was worried that he would be implicated, so he immediately went home and burned "Jia Shuo", and immediately distanced himself from his relationship with Su Shi.
In order to keep his official position, he also instigated Su Shizi and fabricated false charges.
When Su Shi was imprisoned, he successfully ascended to the high position of Zhongshu Minister.
" Cai Gen Tan " says: "Hunger leads to attachment, fullness leads to rising, burning leads to tendency, cold leads to abandonment, and human relationships are prone to disasters."
Human feelings are repeated, and people's hearts are unpredictable.
When you are prosperous, powerful friends will praise you, praise you, and get close to you;
When you are down, they will reveal their true nature and instead of lifting you up, they will step on you severely.
We must understand that those who come after profit will be cut off when the profit is exhausted.
When you encounter such people, you must stay away as soon as possible, and be careful of them adding insult to injury.
3
Unscrupulous friends: Harmful to nature
In a program, the host Venus once asked Guo Degang: What are the standards for recruiting disciples?
Guo Degang answered: initially looked at talent and ability, but now it mainly looks at character.
In fact, making friends is even more like this.
A friend with bad moral character is like a tree without roots, teetering on the edge of falling, and will fall on you before you know when.
There is such a story in "Late Bloomer":
Qiusheng and the poet Jin Xipu were young playmates and close friends.
One Spring Festival, Jin Xipu, who had been drifting in Beijing for many years, came to Qiu Sheng's house.
He said that he is now a great poet and has made friends with many dignitaries.
Qiu Sheng's father was worried about his son's lack of employment, so he entrusted him to help find a job in the county.
Jin Xipu patted his chest and said that there was no problem, but there was a lack of activity funds.
Qiu Sheng's father was heartbroken and gave him all the 20,000 yuan he had worked hard to save for most of his life.
But more than half a year has passed, and Jin Xipu seems to have disappeared into the sea.
Qiu Sheng’s father went out to inquire about things and found out that he was a bastard who was cheating and cheating.
Yesterday he was a poet, today he is a star, changing his identity to deceive the country people and do some evil things.
Twenty thousand yuan was wasted. Qiu Sheng's father was so angry that he died of a heart attack.
couldn’t help but sigh when he saw this.
The book " Zhenhun " says:
Some people are born with five evil elements, and every pore on their body exudes aggressive little viciousness. No place is fatal, but no place does not bite.
An unscrupulous person will tell nonsense lies when he opens his mouth, and his actions will be despised by others.
They are like a big chimney emitting poisonous smoke. When they intersect with them, we will naturally be choked and blackened.
Instead of waiting until you suffer a loss and then wake up, it is better to keep your eyes open and screen them out of the circle as soon as possible.
4
Negative friends: drag you down
The famous psychology professor David Hawking once conducted an experiment on energy. After analyzing millions of pieces of data, he concluded:
The magnetic field of people with positive energy can run in an orderly manner, making people around them feel happy and comfortable;
The magnetic field of people with negative energy is disordered. , irritating and negative.
If you stay with negative friends for a long time, you will also lose confidence in life.
Psychology master Carnegie once told the experience of his friend Karel in a book.
One time, Carell went out to install the company's newly developed machine.
Unexpectedly, the machine could only barely run after being assembled, far from achieving the expected results.When
’s friends saw this, they immediately sighed and complained that the new machine technology was immature.
When the other party returned to the hotel, they slammed the door, kicked the table, and cursed the leader for deliberately making things difficult for them.
Karel, who had always been optimistic, also complained that he was no longer interested in work and even wanted to quit his job.
During those days, he had trouble sleeping and eating, and also suffered from gastrointestinal problems and was admitted to the hospital.
But when he arrived at the hospital, he was lying on the hospital bed alone without his friends around, and his mood improved quickly.
Only then did Karel realize that it was his friend's bad mood that affected him.
Later, when he took on assignments, he would rather lead new people than partner with friends.
Scientific research shows that: humans are the only animals that can accept cues.
We are always subtly influenced by the emotions of the people around us.
When you are with cheerful friends, your positive and optimistic mood can easily be aroused, and you are willing to look on the bright side of everything.
Those who have negative thinking dislike everything they see and always complain when they open their mouths. Under their influence, we often become anxious and pessimistic.
Avoid those who consume you, spend more time with those who nourish you, and live every day with enthusiasm.
▽
Jia Pingwa wrote in "Game World":
The circle you are in is actually the world of your life, representing your aesthetics and level of life.
If the friends around you have been consuming you, you must stop the loss in time.
A truly comfortable relationship allows you to grow and appreciate together, rather than letting you slowly grow into a face that is bullied by life.
Like . Delete these kinds of false friends and make room for them, so that you can gain the most sincere feelings.
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