do you know?
Life is actually a process of "constant filtering" and continuous filtering.
You will meet many people and pass by many people, but only a few people can interact with you, produce a story, and accompany you for a while.
Among this group of people, some are nodding, some are ordinary friends, some are colleagues, and some are relatives.
As we grow older, we are constantly filtering out those "expired feelings" in our circle of friends.
Life train, someone will get off the train halfway.
You will find that many good friends have weakened their feelings as they walk, and friendship is getting farther and farther away.
Under normal circumstances, if nothing unexpected happens, you will be completely silent in each other's circle of friends.
no longer bothers, there will be no intersection until the end "forget each other in the world".
However, what does it mean to suddenly find you if you have not been in contact for a long time?
-01
I encountered difficulties on material
I thought of my experience.
I never contacted that friend’s classmate for 6 years and later went to a different university.
After graduation, they all have their own work, life, family and circles.
has not been in contact for a long time, but just silently pays attention to the other party’s circle of friends.
Once, he suddenly sent me a message.
I was stunned when I saw his message, not knowing what to say.
He said:
"I have encountered some problems recently. Can you lend me some money? Not much, it's only 10,000 yuan, I'll give it to you in a month."
I didn't reply to the message, but asked several other classmates about it.
It turned out that he had borrowed money from his classmates and friends who were still in contact with him.
That moment I realized:
"Oh, I was planning to borrow money so I remembered me."
Fortunately, I was more careful and did not reply to his message.
Later, other classmates said that he owed millions of dollars in gambling online, and his relatives and friends had borrowed them all, and no one knew where he had gone.
In interpersonal communication, feelings have a shelf life.
If you realize that your friendship is over and will not appear in each other's life again, then the other party must have encountered some difficulties when he finds you.
Generally speaking, you either borrow money or find you to share money.
For example, if the other party asks you to chat first, then inadvertently say to you: "I'm going to get married. I'm going to attend my wedding next month?"
You are not going to reply, nor are you going to not reply, you can only find excuses to refuse.
The relationship between adults is very realistic.
Only when the space is close and each other knows the bottom line can we be willing to have material and economic contact with each other.
You are not in the same city as the other party, and you haven't contacted each other for a long time, and you don't even know where the other party's home is.
The other party asks you to borrow money, are you willing?
No one is a fool unless you are willing to be deceived by you.
-02
Emotionally "disturbance"
One thing that came to mind, it was very interesting.
A female college student sent a message in the class group and called a male student to "have some face."
The reason is:
Male classmate added female classmates in each class and said to each female classmate: "Are you in love? Are you interested in marrying me?"
really every girl has not fallen behind.
has been graduated for many years, and everyone rarely contacts.
Even if you want to fall in love and get married, you can't be so anxious, right?
Finally, the boy was angry and voluntarily quit the class group.
Friends who have not seen each other for a long time contact you again, either borrowing money from you or wanting to "talk about your relationship" with you.
Perhaps, he suddenly thought of the memories between you and the friendly side of your youth.
contact you, just to talk about memories, reminisce about the past, and greet each other.
Perhaps, he is currently single, and suddenly he thought of you, a "classmate of the opposite sex", and he still has an impression of you.
He just has a try-out mentality and may have some feelings for you.
Perhaps, he has something to ask for you, and wants to play the emotional card to reduce your defense, and then make some requests for you.
-03
WeChat chat, don't you say it is here? Please say it just because you have something to say
There is a problem on Zhihu:
"Why do people nowadays hate it Did the other party post while chatting on WeChat? "
One of the netizens said:
"Answer you are, it exposed my trump card; if I don't reply to you, I want to wait for you to finish your purpose, and then decide whether to answer you; as a result, you disappeared after you post it, what do you want me to do? "
is indeed the case.
Many people actually hate the opening remarks like "Is it here?"
Tell me what you have and say it straight. Adults don’t like the “winding and winding” social way. This is even more true for friends who have not been in contact with for many years.
If you plan to reminisce about the past and contact your feelings, then express it bluntly.
If you have something to ask the other party for help, you can directly explain your intention.
Express your attitude and purpose, and the rest depends on the other party.
If he responds to you, it means he is willing to help you;
If he does not reply to the message, then you don’t need to disturb you anymore.
One of the unspoken social rules for adults: "If you don't reply to messages, you are the answer."
Today's topic:
Friends who have not been in contact for a long time have you ever disturbed?
(Article pictures are from the Internet)
