The evening breeze outside the window was whistling, and my thoughts began to become clearer. Maybe it's energy, maybe what I lack in is it. Since I was a child, I have never been an ambitious person. I have no desire for anything and have never done anything seriously.
Now that I think of it, it seems to be quite a failure, but I am used to this kind of life, which also makes me out of place with reality. The more I want to live freely and lazy, the more I start to complain about the world.
"I'm fed up with this cowardice when I'm going to be a civil servant and being an old man!" I always say to Kevin like this. "It's all about work, I want something happy." Kevin always answers me like this.
In the collision with reality, my desire for laziness and freedom always withered slowly in Kevin's persuasion, but the roots still existed so stubbornly.
"Maybe I am destined to be such a person. Libra isn't it the most accurate position when it is still?"
I suddenly began to miss the carefree days when I was a child, but the memories became blurred. In addition to happiness, those past times were slowly crushed in the salty sea breeze.
I swallowed my beer, my eyes chasing in the dark night, searching until it disappeared...
"Probably......" I murmured. Respond to Linda, Tim, and herself.
Should I choose to live lightly or heavyly? I don't know either. In a relaxed and comfortable life, I hope I can be more capable and busier; when I shoulder the burden and are so tired that I can't breathe, I yearn for leisurely days. Therefore, it doesn’t matter whether you choose or not, people always live in contradictions.
"The heaviest burden oppresses us, makes us succumb to it, and presses us to the ground. But in the love poems of all generations, women always long to bear the weight of a male body. Therefore, the heaviest burden also becomes the image of the strongest vitality. The heavier the burden, the closer our life is to the earth, the more real it is. On the contrary, when the burden is completely missing, people will become lighter than the air, float up, and stay away from the earth and life on the earth. People are just one and a half real existence, and their movement will become free and meaningless. So, what exactly do you choose? Is it heavy or light?"
-Milan Kundera
