The so-called growth means seeing everything is strange, I hope to find out.
The so-called maturity means encountering strange things and avoiding them from afar.
Chekov said: "Life is an annoying cage. When a thoughtful person becomes a man and has a mature feeling about life, he cannot help but feel that he is locked in a cage that cannot escape."
After adulthood, life is so hard that it is too much to breathe. He needs to think of a way to break out of the bad circle of life.
Don’t turn against you when you encounter bad people, and don’t get entangled when you encounter bad things. This is the self-discipline you should have and not let internal friction trap yourself.
01
Don’t turn against each other, give others some face.
The world is big and there are many people, and you can't know everyone. Therefore, some people just turn against each other.
In fact, our living space is very small, and many people look down and see each other. If you turn against him, it will be difficult to get along in the future. The other party may also make trouble in secret, making you unpredictable.
It is completely unnecessary to make enemies with someone. Even if you meet a villain, don’t rush to break off diplomatic relations. Maybe the other party still has the opportunity to reform?
If there are two people who make enemies, please judge and speak carefully and don’t offend anyone. If they make up, you will be ugly, both sides are not human.
It is easy to turn against each other, faster than flirting with books. But it is not easy to make each other smile. Therefore, you must be someone who does not turn against you easily and save some face.
Warring States , 日本 日本 , 日本 , the house has a lot of fertile land and many visitors.
One day, Pingyuanjun went out for a trip, and Xiaoguan Zhao She came to collect taxes. The servant acted like a fake tiger's power and refused to pay.
Zhao She dealt with his disciples according to the law.
Pingyuan Jun found Zhao She fiercely and questioned her a few questions.
Zhao She said: "You are the most respected person in Zhao State. If you despise the law, people will imitate it and the country will decline. If the country is gone, your family will be defeated. What else is there to be proud of?"
Pingyuan Jun immediately realized the mistake and not only paid taxes, but also recommended Zhao She as a general.
Professor Zeng Shiqiang said: "How should we deal with things when encountering them: It is best to give him face first and ask him to automatically tell the truth. Give him face or not, and give him face again."
To put it bluntly, it means following the rule of "no matters can be done three times", giving people face twice, and observing the results. A truly smart person will make a fuss after he gets face and then take the initiative to reconcile.
Only by giving your family face can the family be harmonious. You took the initiative to smile at your family, and I guess anyone would be embarrassed to continue to care about you. If you suffer a loss, it is your greatest blessing. Even if you admit defeat, it doesn't matter. Singing harlequin once by yourself is actually another kind of beauty.
Only by giving face to outsiders can the living environment be harmonious. If you turn against the people around you, you can only move. But moving costs money, which is not something that ordinary people can afford.
If the dog bites you, do you want to bite the dog? Once you think about this problem clearly, you will know how to do it. The same is true for dealing with bad people, not to mention that bad people have the possibility of correcting, and they are much smarter than dogs.
02
Don’t get entangled, learn to get out of your body.
Everyone wants to go forward, but the road ahead is often "a thousand troops cross a single-plank bridge". Therefore, we must learn to give way. How to make way for
? The best way is to walk and pass in turn to avoid various congestion.
I have seen a driver who went to the line when he was in a traffic jam and even looked savage. He fought with other drivers for a while, then delayed for several hours and was punished. Originally, the purpose of jumping in line was to increase the speed, but it turned out to be the slowest car.
Spring and Autumn , when Duke Huan of Qi died, Qi State was in chaos, and several young men competed for the throne. Crown Prince Zizhao was forced to flee to Song Dynasty .
Duke Xiang of Song According to the arrangements of Duke Huan of Qi during his lifetime, he summoned the troops of Wei, Cao and Zhu to protect Zi Zhao, and replaced the throne and serve as Duke Xiao of Song.
After doing a good thing, Duke Xiang of Song became elated. He believed that he had the potential to be a hegemon, so he took the initiative to make an appointment with the princes around him, form an alliance together, and recommend himself as the top leader.
The princes did not listen to Duke Xiang of Song. Some defected to Chu , and some formed an alliance with Lu .
The ending is obvious. Duke Xiang of Song did a good thing, but did not let go in time, which made the princes dislike him.
We need to remember one thing: no matter what, once you can't get entangled, it's a bad thing.
The best way to break things is to let go and not read the past.
Just like the master of Chinese studies, Ji Xianlin, , cracked the Tocharisma in Xinjiang and was called the "academic master". I just laughed it off and didn't take it seriously. When I was in school, I wanted to go to mathematics, but I was rejected. I decided to adjust myself decisively, learn language and literature, and find another way.
How can everything go well in life? It’s just that “it’s better to have less than more things.”
For bad things, first, must learn to see clearly. Observe calmly, whether it will be of great importance to you or not. If you can't fight together, let go completely and don't ask about it in the future.
and then take the initiative to assume responsibility. If you are wrong, you admit your mistake. If others are wrong, you are tolerant. Saying "I'm sorry" will not bring any loss and will save face; saying "It's okay" is the pattern of being a human being.
Finally , we need to replace the bad things from the past with brand new things. This is the reason why the old ones don’t go away and the new ones don’t come. Even if you do good things, don’t think about leaving a name, otherwise it will be very uncomfortable. Just do the next good thing.
03
Grasimov wrote in "Book Talk": "People read books twice in their life: one in their student days, and the other in their adult days."
When they were students, they picked up the books and slowly pondered them; after adulthood, their life experience, work experience, people and things they met are books that they can’t finish.
A calm life requires the wisdom of life; a comfortable relationship requires active courtesy.
When you encounter bad people, just laugh it off; when you encounter bad things, just let them go.
In the most difficult time, cultivate your best self.
has a big pattern and everything is easy to do.
Author: Common people eat coarse food.
Follow my text and enter your heart.
The pictures in the article are from the Internet.
