People like me
Little Young Mao Buyi There is a song: "People Like Me", in which there are many descriptions of self:
A person as outstanding as me should have lived a brilliant life, but why has it been floating in the sea of people for more than 20 years?
A person as smart as me has long bid farewell to simplicity, why did he still use a relationship to exchange for scars?
A person as confused as me,
A person as I am looking for,
How many people have you seen as me as me?
. I am a vulgar person like me. I never like to pretend to be deep. Why do you suddenly shake my god when I hear old songs occasionally?
. A cowardly person like me, I have to keep a few points in everything? How could I have thought about doing it for anyone?
. A confused person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like me, a person like
...
In this song, there are more than 10 words to describe "me", including self-deprecating, conflicting, doubts and unwillingness.
Does "People Like Me" look like you?
So, which one is the real "me"?
2 Who is "I"? Self-concept
Only when there is the world can I have me, and only when there is me can I have the world in my heart.
Social psychology's study of the subjective world begins with the formation of self-concept.
Self-concept, that is, a person's experience of his own existence.
For example, we look in the mirror every day and pay attention to our appearance, so we have a general understanding of our appearance, which is the concept of body self-beautiful, handsome or average.
For example, we study every day, pay attention to our own gains, and compare the achievements of others, we have a general understanding of our own learning level and ability. This is an academic self-concept—eugenics or poor students.
For example, when we do things every day, pay attention to our own success or failure, and compare the achievements of others, we have a general understanding of our own abilities and form the final sense of self-efficacy - capable or incompetent, and self-esteem - self-confidence or inferiority.
Self-concept is a description of yourself, some pictures, and some activity scenes, and some evaluations of yourself and others are also added. It's like a year-end summary report about yourself. However, it is imagery.
Use simple fill-in-the-blanks, such as 5-10 "I am a person who is --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
However, self-concept is not just a fill-in-the-blank question about yourself. The answer to this fill-in-the-blank question will affect you later.
3 The power of belief
People believe what they are, what they are -Russia Chekov
The reason why the self-concept is important is because it is people’s “belief” about themselves.
, and believe that it is powerful.
For example, there are so-called top students and poor students in a class. Why do we oppose the title of "poor student"? I am a poor student—this is the idea buried in his heart. It doesn't matter who gives this concept to him, what's important is the impact next. Isn’t it natural for a so-called poor student to do things that are consistent with the poor student’s identity?
My math is not good, so I started to worry before every math class whether the math teacher would ask myself. However, after the math class, I welcomed Chinese class or physical education class with anticipation.
Is it true that I am really not suitable for learning mathematics? No, it’s because I don’t think I’m suitable for – mathematical self-concept.
In fact, this is a common phenomenon: many girls think they are not suitable for learning three-dimensional geometry or mathematics, and many boys think they are not suitable for learning language courses such as English.
Therefore, it has become common for only 2-3 boys in the 30 classes in the foreign language department in the university.Is it really not suitable for boys to learn English?
Life experience forms a self-concept, and the self-concept is like a staff officer, constantly affecting the choices and actions we need to make next.
So, we each took our own "staff" to face everything.
So, we act with our psychological judgment about our "this way", "that way not", and a psychological state of confidence or inferiority.
feels that it is impossible to learn well, and it may eventually become really impossible to learn well.
So, the question is, where does a good or bad self-concept come from ?
4 The decline of a poor student in mathematics
returns to the frightening mathematics. Why is my "mathematical self-concept" not good?
This is the first thing to blame yourself.
because I am lazy. What impressed me most was that there was a stage in primary school that I had to learn four-step operation . The braces were covered with brackets, and the brackets were covered with brackets. There were also symbols of addition, subtraction, multiplication and division outside the brackets, so I felt it was very troublesome and I didn’t understand why some people had ulterior motives and wanted to deliberately make the formula so complicated. It was sent by God to target me!
is afraid of trouble, so I feel it is even more troublesome.
Secondly, the math teacher at that time was very fierce and often beat people.
Therefore, the fear of mathematics teachers gradually turned into fear of mathematics. This fear may last for life.
But, is it really not suitable for me to learn mathematics? Now I have the ability to reflect, and looking back, it’s really not.
In fact, there was a paragraph where I did a good job of applying maths, so good that if the math teacher had something to come at that time, the classmate would invite me to the podium to tell you about the application questions.
This is strange. They are all math, why is there such a big difference? Later, after I carefully understood it, I realized that in the eyes of me, a later liberal arts student, it was more like a story about Car A and Car B!
Both your own reasons and the teacher’s reasons need to be considered. Sometimes I think that if the math teacher at that time was not so fierce and not so frightening, and even if I could give me some praise after I explained the questions to everyone, and encourage me to do more four-character operations, maybe my math self-concept would be much better! Assumptions like
are of course not fair to that teacher. How could he know a mathematics course? Among the dozens of students, there are people like me who divide mathematics into troublesome "science mathematics" and "liberal arts mathematics" like stories!
5 The birth of a liberal arts student
For a poor math student, my math self-concept comes from external feedback - the criticism of the teacher of bad math scores; I am not saying that we only have "strict math culture ". I was studying Chinese well at that time. The primary school Chinese teacher was a gentle and patient middle-aged mother. Every time we went to class, we felt that learning texts was enjoying the warmth of the sun, which was definitely not like the mathematics class with gusts of cold wind.
Those good or bad feedbacks make us feel successful or failed. constantly shapes our sense of effectiveness for ourselves - part of our self-concept, and the evaluation of whether we can be competent for certain activities.
Self-concept comes from comparison with other students' math scores - social comparison.
Through comparison, we know our position in this group, and thus get evaluations about our "position level". Even, to be honest, part of our sense of happiness really comes from the shortcomings of others.
Self-concept also comes from Other people's evaluation : Because when talking about Chinese and mathematics, there are slight differences in the way people around you interact with you. The “I” in his mouth becomes our reference standard for measuring ourselves. Other people’s evaluation is very important, and good evaluation means acceptance. As social animals, from the beginning of evolution, individuals who are recognized and accepted by the group are more likely to survive. The consequences of being excluded by the group are very serious.
Finally, my self-concept was settled with my identity as an identity . Identifying a certain social identity will give you a sense of belonging, and it will also behave more like that social identity. Isn’t it normal for a liberal arts student to be in poor mathematics?
is also because we found an identity in , and we got the explanation - I am a liberal arts student, don’t talk to me about mathematics!
6 Conclusion
Life shapes us, we shape life.
Our understanding of the outside world is carried out under the guidance of the "military advisor" of the self-concept. Given the centrality of the "self" and other psychological phenomena surrounding the self-concept, we are well aware of the important impact of the self-concept on a person.
In the next few issues, we will discuss other psychological phenomena related to self-concept. Here is a passage to everyone first:
You need to determine how much you are worth, that is someone else's business, and the important thing is to be yourself. You are no darker than a star, no lower than a tree. ——Russian critical realism writer Turgenev
Russian critical realism writer Turgenev
I am the leader, there will be a time later!
