Saying goodbye to the past without saying goodbye is the best unbroken promise for the future.
But not everyone can afford to put it down.
Especially women.
What would you do if you face a man who doesn't love you and who uses cold violence on you?
Zhang Youyi chose to sacrifice herself for Xu Zhimo to help the other party, but in the end only a piece of divorce letter was obtained.
When people are "moved" by Xu Zhimo's romance, enthusiasm, infatuation and persistence, looking back at that time, we have to admit that he was ruthless and cruel to his first wife, Zhang Youyi.
Zhang Youyi said: "Apart from fulfilling the most basic marital obligations, he ignored me. Even in fulfilling the marital obligations, he just followed his parents' wish to have grandchildren."
Zhang Youyi was very happy after the divorce. He quickly cheered up from his grief and entered the Pestalozzi Academy, specializing in early childhood education. After returning to China, he founded Yunshang Company and took charge of Shanghai Women's Savings Bank, both of which were great successes.
When I was young and inexperienced in the world, I read Zhang Youyi and lamented that she was pitiful throughout her life.
As I grow older, I find more and more: Women, although the process of being able to afford and let go is long and difficult, once you break through, it is a rebirth!
allows you to recover without medicine, calmly, and face the next stage of life with a wave of your hand, in the shortest possible time, relying solely on your own energy, even if you experience tremendous pain.
I couldn't help but think of "She and Her Islands" I read recently. I thought I didn't like reading novels, but this novel really touched my heart.
The author @彄ä», whose real name is Yi Nan, chose "Yi Nan" as a homophonic pen name because he hated his own name since he was a child. Yi Tong Yi means "exceeding".
Perhaps it is for this reason that she is particularly good at writing about women's inner world, because she cares too much: Women should have their own lives.
In her novel, three generations of women, old, middle and young, have their own different lives and dilemmas, but they are ordinary you and me in reality, not princesses or Cinderella.
But we are all such ordinary women, how can we live a good life?
01 In a life without love, frantically looking for love
Li Yijin (the heroine) is an ordinary older Beijing drifter woman who mostly lives in the shadow of her native family.
She has a sick mother, Meng Mingwei, who is weak and disliked by her husband but has a strong desire to control her daughter.
Li Yijin likes bottles because of the boy who almost walked into her life in her youth. He gave her a bottle with a rolled up note inside that said "I like you."
This was originally It was a good start, but Meng Mingwei's indiscriminate behavior was regarded as "evidence of guilt." She ignored the obstruction of the class teacher and, as an elder, wanted the boy to "surrender" and plead guilty in public.
Meng Mingwei invaded Li Yijin's daily life in this way, to the point of "pathological symbiosis" .
"Pathological symbiosis" was proposed by teacher Wu Zhihong.
First, parents invade their children's lives. Even if children become adults, they cannot completely get rid of their parents' influence.
The second is that parents cannot accept children who go against their wishes. Even if the children are disgusted, they can only cater to their parents pathologically.
Li Yijin's first half year was like this, like a walking zombie.
Yang Yuanyuan, a graduate student at Shanghai Maritime University who committed suicide, is a living tragedy.
On November 26, 2009, he hung his body on the bathroom faucet with two towels tied together in the dormitory bathroom, ending his 30-year-old life.
Some people said that the sink was less than one meter above the ground. As long as there was a glimmer of desire to survive, she could stand up and return to life at any time.
However, with her mother's inseparable presence and no freedom at all, she decisively bid farewell to her life.
Rather than saying that Li Yijin likes to collect bottles, it is better to say that Li Yijin is struggling to pursue the possibility of "being loved" in her life.
02 Happiness cannot remain unchanged
Meng Mingweiās life was full of sympathy from the beginning.
She was an abandoned baby since she was a child. After being picked up and brought home by Factory Director Qiao, a strong woman in business, she accidentally contracted polio due to a problem with the anti-pyretic injection and became crippled for life.
Factory Manager Qiao has been strong all her life. She thinks that her husband is honest and honest, so she has a happy marriage.
She also found an honest partner for Meng Mingwei, thinking that from now on, Mingwei would have a worry-free life.
Who knew that the good son-in-law she hand-picked would turn out to be her daughter's lifelong nightmare, and almost made Mingwei end her life because of it.
As for Meng Mingwei's failed marriage, she never thought about self-salvation, and only thought about placing all her life's hopes on her daughter Li Yijin.
She introduced a partner to Li Yijin and wanted Yijin to settle down as soon as possible, but Li Yijin collapsed and said: "You are not worthy of being a mother. You should not have given birth to me in the first place."
Meng Mingwei was shocked. She had never thought about it. The daughter who had always been well-behaved and obedient turned out to be so rebellious.
Meng Mingwei and her mother, Factory Director Qiao, cried bitterly: "I used to be harsh to her, beat her and scolded her. I always thought that she would be successful in the future, so she would know my painstaking efforts. Now, she hates me as much as her enemies." "She even said that I was not worthy of being her mother."
The old lady comforted her: "How can I be called unworthy? My daughter made such an angry comment and felt that she failed to be a mother. That's all." After years of raising you, how will I fail?"
Meng Mingwei sighed and remained silent.
Each generation has its own life, and the previous generation cannot predict the happiness of the next generation.
Because happiness cannot remain unchanged.
Factory Manager Qiao only discovered at the end of his life that the old man who was always obedient to him had developed Alzheimer's disease and became like a mouse and a cat when he saw him, but what he couldn't forget in his heart was another one. woman.
Meng Mingwei thought that he had compromised his lifelong marriage for the sake of his daughter, but it turned out to be the most painful years in Li Yijin's life.
In Li Yijin's eyes, only by completely letting go of the past can life have a new beginning.
03 Let go of the past and welcome a new beginning
Li Yijin supports Meng Mingwei's divorce from her father. In her eyes, that unstable man is good for nothing except beating his wife and scolding his children.
If Li Yijin had been escaping before, this time, after discovering that his mother Meng Mingwei was forced to commit suicide by jumping off a building, Li Yijin's support and confrontation seemed independent and courageous.
It was only at this moment that Meng Mingwei suddenly realized that this daughter who had never counted anything had grown up.
She asked Li Yijin: "Are you tired of working and struggling alone in Beijing these years? Mom can't give you anything. Do you hate me in your heart?"
Li Yijin was stunned. She had thought Countless times like this, as long as her mother asks this question, she will definitely tell her mother bitterly:
"Yes, it's all because of you that I ended up like this. I would rather drift north for the rest of my life or drink the northwest wind for the rest of my life." I won't come back to you."
She fantasizes about such a day of relief, where she wants to vent all the worries she has accumulated over the years.
But when she actually heard the question, she seemed to no longer feel this way.
Li Yijin told Meng Mingwei: "I let myself go, so I am what I am today."
Yes, in this life, people stumble and search, but in the end they just let themselves go. Maybe there is no money, maybe there is no money. Quan is an ordinary life.
But we can have our own dreams and desires, but in the end, it's just peace and quiet.
Summary
In the end, Director Qiao, who was so strong that "the three daughters must join their parents' family on New Year's Eve", chose to go to a nursing home. She wanted to return Meng Mingwei's life to Mingwei herself and let her start over.
Meng Mingzhu also accepted the boyfriend Li Yijin chose and accepted that he was the son of a murderer, because this is all in the past. She believed that Li Yijin and her boyfriend Zhou Zhou would have their own future.
Li Yijin personally ended his parents' unbearable marriage. While protecting his mother, he also proved his ability to deal with life problems independently.
The most attractive thing about "She and Her Islands" is that it does not focus on the contradictions on a certain character through background settings to express the suffering of women, nor does it have a "Fan Shengmei" who is gradually becoming a facial expression. The author Yi Nan of
tells the life stories of a total of six female characters of different ages in an atypical "matriarchal" family. Each one has flesh and blood, and they are all the ordinary us we are in reality!
The collision, warmth, and symbiosis between them constitute a life chapter of ice and fire.
feels cool at first, but is actually warm.
