Author/Ye Chen·Zhengzhou, Henan Editor/Yu Fu·Hedong, Tianjin [Yu Fu speaks more] Whether it is to maintain a sense of existence or to have fun secretly, in Yu Fu’s view, they are all manifestations of loving and cherishing life.

Author/Ye Chen·Zhengzhou, Henan

Editor/Yu Fu·Tianjin Hedong

[Yu speaks more]

Whether it is to have a sense of existence or to have fun secretly, in Yu Fu’s view, it is a manifestation of loving and cherishing life.

It’s not that those friends who talk about the city, play deep, and wrap themselves up airtight don’t love life and don’t cherish life. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with this kind of life or way of living. It’s just that life is short and life is over. It's hard enough, so why be too hard on yourself?

The happiness of being alone is not as good as the happiness of everyone. Since we can’t escape the temptation of existence, why not increase our sense of existence generously?

Chatting with a friend, he said: "When people live, there are three levels of shackles. The first level is fame and wealth, the second level is family affection, and the third level is existence. People who break free from the first and second levels are still more common in ancient and modern times. It’s common, but people who can escape existence are really rare.”

Thinking about it, people have been unremittingly pursuing immortality for five thousand years of Chinese civilization. Finally, they proposed the “three immortals” of virtue, meritorious service, and speech, which can be regarded as a gift to the world. A positive direction. But whether it is virtue, merit, or words, it seems clear, but in fact it is difficult to say. What kind of virtue is considered to be a good virtue, what kind of merit is considered to be a meritorious service, and what kind of words are considered to be a good word. This standard is really difficult to grasp. There is no other way, we can only use the baptism of time and the precipitation of history. If it is still remembered by people, it will be immortal.

Immortal virtues, merits, and words are inherently immortal, but they have nothing to do with the person who establishes them. The person who has been washed away by history has long been changed beyond recognition, or not completely changed, and the things he established are probably not completely or even partially changed. What we know today as Laozi, , Confucius and , except for the names, I am really not sure about the rest. What deserves to decay will naturally perish.

With the fast pace of modern life and the rapid development of information technology, people cannot wait for immortality after death, so they have slowly invented a way of "living immortality", which is often called a sense of existence. Weibo, WeChat posts about delicious food, beautiful scenery, studies, sports, children, and love, and there are also those like me who are so rotten that they post about reading. No matter what you post or how you post it, you actually want to accumulate some sense of presence. How else can you prove that you are alive?

Every time I update an article, the number of times I check my mobile phone increases significantly. If others like it more, it seems to make me feel refreshed throughout the day. If others pay less attention, I feel a bit more disappointed. In fact, I myself know that there are very few people who can actually read the article from beginning to end, but I just can’t shake off or escape this feeling.

The existence of this thing, explained by Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory , is the "need for respect and recognition". According to the Western idealism theory, "Human is the measure of all things, the measure of the existence of existents, and the measure of the non-existence of non-existent things." That is to say, if I see a flower, the flower is there; if I don't see the flower, the flower is not there. , then my existence is decided by others besides me.

In this way, people will have a theoretical basis for brushing up on their presence. Politicians from various countries are active in the center of world politics, which attracts the world's attention. Therefore, they are more likely to be seen by more than 6 billion people on the earth, and their presence is strong; the same is true for business leaders, movie stars, etc. Zhang Ailing doesn't it say " You have to be famous early. If you come too late, happiness will not be so happy. "As for us ordinary people, just brush each other up in our own circle of friends, and we can always help each other. Don't forget each other in the world .

I have been thinking during this period, what would happen if there was only one person left on the earth? Will there be any sense of presence again then? Would this person still dance gracefully on a stage without an audience? I think it still will. If it were me, I would do two things: first, believe that there is another person and embark on a journey to find him; second, play with myself.Just think about it, why do people become addicted to virtual games? Isn’t it just to enjoy the fun of self-challenge and self-upgrading? Treat the world where only you are left as a game. In the goal of finding another person, constantly challenge yourself and defeat yourself. Isn't it the same when playing games alone? Just treat yourself as the protagonist.

　Loneliness is a person’s carnival. Although it is difficult to transcend the sense of existence, you must also find the value of your own existence. If you take other people's evaluation as the standard for everything, then a person will always be caught between joy and loss. If you cannot appreciate the beauty of diamonds and wear diamonds just to show off to others, one day you will wear a brick around your neck. Boast and praise are like invisible ropes that people will willingly put around their necks and be manipulated by them.

Wang Anshi's poem goes: "There are several plum blossoms in the corner, Ling Han blooms alone." One "blooms alone" is really wonderful. Humans are social animals and cannot live without the collective and others. For us ordinary people, we are born to crawl around in the secular world, so we can't help but be happy when others are happy and feel sad when others are sad. What I think is that when a man dies for a confidant, he also dies for himself; when a woman dies for a man who pleases her, she dies more for herself.

I remember a story about a female soldier. It said that a female soldier got up 20 minutes early every morning after joining the army, put on her makeup carefully, then looked in the mirror and admired it, then took off her makeup and went out for training. This lovely female soldier really lived out the realm of "women are their own appearance".

The ancients said that "the joy of benevolence and wisdom can only be expressed in words", which means that the joy of wise people cannot be expressed in words. I think, leaving aside whether it is benevolence or wisdom, we must first ask ourselves, does this happiness come from the sincerity? As long as it comes from the sincerity, even if it is like a fool's happiness, you can be straightforward and do your best, so why not? The happiness that comes from the heart can be exposed to the sun, and the happiness of being alone will turn into the happiness of others. If the crowd is not happy, it is better to be happy alone.

Thinking about it this way, "having fun secretly" is really an independent and free realm of benevolence and wisdom. In life, you might as well have more "secret fun".

[About the author] Ye Chen, whose real name is Zhang Yechen, is born in the 1980s in Lucheng, . He wears a military uniform and travels around the world. He sharpens his ambition through hard work, practices through reading, makes friends through articles, cultivates his mind, and explores life. Many personal works have been published.