Pai River and Gao River. A small village with hundreds of families hidden under the green trees is like a piece of jasper embedded on Hebei plain. Looking at the distance from the north, Longshan is seen in the mist, and the gurgling river water like a jade belt in the south is passing by the village. It is said that the floods spread very early and long ago, and humans were extinct. Only Fuxi and Nuwa brothers and sisters were left with gourds drifting here, rolling stones to get married, and reproduce humans. There are Fuxi's painting of the Guatai and brother and sister temple in the village. People in the village call it people's ancestor temple . This village is called Fuxi Bay.
Fuxi Bay is distributed with four surnames: Zhuang, Huang, Jia and Zhao, and is known as the Southern Emperor and the Northern Beggar. To the east of Xie Street near Renzu Temple, the village committee, party branch, villagers' activity center, branch secretary and village chief Zhuang Zhong and Zhuang family members are all here. The politics, economy and culture of the village are all tilted here, so it is called Dongxie. The west of the village is a primary school, and the Huang family who lives here loves to study. They have produced several college students, graduate students, and international students, so they are called Xidai. The south of the village is the vegetable field for the whole village, which leads directly to the south to the county town. The street lights are shining, and small villas on both sides of the road are next to each other. The rich people in the village live here, known as the Fuxi Bay Development Zone. Jia Shili and other members of the Jia clan lived here. Although Jia Shili was a commoner, he secretly controlled the major affairs in the village. He was like the local emperor in the village, so he was called the Southern Emperor; the north of the village was a low old bungalow, a curved and narrow street, and lived with the Zhao clan and other poor people who were honest and honest, facing the loess and facing the sky. They lived in a tight life, so they were called the Northern Beggar.
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Fuxi Bay has many allusions, Zhang's parents, Li's family has shorts, three toads have two eyes. Let’s talk about making fish soup first. It is said that a long time ago, someone from the Huang family caught a small fish in the river and took it home. How to eat it? After studying for a long time, I decided to make fish soup. I put a large pot of water and set the fire. The pot was on. The whole family drank it. They all said that the fish soup was too fresh and delicious! Unexpectedly, when he turned around, he saw that the little fish was still jumping on the pot. The Huang family’s fish soup has become a joke and has been passed down from generation to generation. One year, the county government wanted to support famous folk foods. Someone told the deputy county magistrate in charge that the Huang family in Fuxi Bay had been making fish soup for hundreds of years, and the whole county knew about it. The deputy county magistrate said, OK, this is intangible cultural heritage ! We need support and register as a well-known trademark. I will go to that village to conduct research tomorrow. Everyone was talking about jokes at the beginning, but they didn’t know that the deputy county magistrate was from another place. They believed it and didn’t know that this was a joke. The secretary thought that if he really went there, it would be a big trouble. The people would not have to blow the county magistrate out, so they had to honestly tell the deputy county magistrate the origin of the joke, and they could not be taken seriously!
The Huang family’s knee high is also an allusion. The Huang family has always been a scholar and is dedicated to decency. It is said that in the former Qing Dynasty, some people from the Huang family went to a banquet in a different village. They were dressed in rags and felt embarrassed, so they borrowed the new robe from their neighbors to wear. This man is tall and has a short robe. He just covered his knees, so he should just wear it. When he arrived at his relative's house, people laughed at his robe for being too short. He said that it was not that his robe was short, but that my knees were high. Therefore, it became a joke that the Huang family’s knees were high. When I met the Huang family, I asked, "Do you have a knee high?" The Huang family often fails to answer.
Fuxi Bay faces rivers. In the past, they were both saline-alkali land, so they planted a gourd and made a scoop. Therefore, in the 1970s, every family lived very poorly. Lao Zhao's family was not smart, had no skills, and their family background was more embarrassing than others. Mr. Zhao looked at him almost thirty and finally said a partner. They were talking in the house. A group of boys eavesdropped outside the door. There were two versions. One was: Do you have a Feiren brand sewing machine in your home? Mr. Zhao was embarrassed to say no, so he said, "I'll say something else." The partner asked if you have a Feige brand bicycle? Mr. Zhao hmmed again and said, "Speak something else; the partner asked if you have a radio at home?" Zhao Lao Men still said, "Tell me something else." After listening for a long time, the people outside the door heard Zhao Lao Men saying, "Tell me something else, say something else."
The second version is: Object Question, how many houses are you in? Mr. Zhao said, "If you even have the thatched cottages, you will find four rooms." He asked, "How many people are you in your family?" The answer is, is my dog worth it? Including the dog, my father, my mother, my younger brother and sister, there are 8 people in total. The partner was angry and thought that this person had a brain problem. He deliberately asked, are you having a dick? Zhao Lao Men was insulted and got angry, and said loudly, "I haven't grown this dick yet? Say something else, say something else!" No matter which version, Zhao Man speaks - say something else, this common saying quickly rushed out of Fuxi Bay and spread throughout Xincheng County , and it has been fresh and fresh. It is in the market banquet and talks with people. Whenever I encounter something I don't accept or like to listen, I twist my neck and say: - Zhao Man speaks, say something else.
The most ridiculous thing about the Jia family is hatching donkeys. It is said that a Jia family was puzzled by how the donkey was born, so they asked the people from other villages, who told him that it was hatched by watermelon. The man bought a large green watermelon and took it home, put it on the hot kang and covered it with a quilt. After covering it for a few days, there was no movement. He lifted the quilt and saw that the watermelon was rotten and the soup was flowing. The man was very upset and picked up the watermelon and threw it out the window. It happened to hit the sleeping hare. The hare was startled and galloped away with the watermelon. The Jia family shouted, "Oh, this little donkey ran so fast as soon as it hatched!"
The elders of the dealer are illiterate and rely on making a living by imitating iron. The five sons of the old man Zhuang family are working as a job. The old man Zhuang swings a sledgehammer, and the sons swing small hammers and pulling bellows, and they are exhausted all day long. I have to find a way out for the child, otherwise I can't even say that my wife is. So I asked someone to find a relationship with my youngest son Zhuang Tiedan finally joined the army and became a car soldier. After a long time, Old Man Zhuang missed his son. Besides, he could go to the army to see it, that was also a supreme glory. So he rushed to the army thousands of miles away.
When it arrived at the military base, it was already past ten o'clock at night. My son was a car soldier and accidentally left the car and went to another place. The instructor said, uncle, it’s really a coincidence that your son just left and it will take ten days and half a month to come back. It is not easy for you to come here forever. Let’s have some food first and stay there. The conditions were poor that year and there was no guesthouse. After dinner, the old man Zhuang fell asleep on his son's bed. After walking for a day, he was really tired. He covered himself with a quilt and fell asleep in a short while. At around twelve o'clock, the sentry standing guard came back. When he saw someone covering his head, snoring like thunder, and his feet were smelling. He thought it was Zhuang Tiedan lying on the bed. He thought that this kid didn't know if he had returned, so he poked the sleeping old man Zhuang with a butt and said, get up and stand guard! As he said that, he put the big gun to the bed and went to bed. Old Man Zhuang was sleeping soundly and was woken up. He covered his head and turned to sit up, thinking: Why are you still standing guard? It may also be the military regulations, so I went to stand guard after wandering around.
In the morning, the company commander got up and washed his face. He looked up and was shocked. He saw a man wearing a sheepskin coat, an dog-skin hat on his back, and carrying a rifle on his back. He was thinking that he was broken, and he had a beard! Maybe he asked Beard to touch the guard post and something big happened! He quickly gathered people and grabbed them. The instructor said, isn’t this Zhuang Tiedan’s father? I found out that I had a misunderstanding after asking. The instructor said that it was too late when Mr. Zhuang came last night. Company Commander, you went to the battalion headquarters for a meeting and did not come back, so you didn't tell you in time. The company commander said, stop talking about anything, hurry up and take the old man Zhuang to check it out to see if it is frostbite? So he picked up the phone, shook it a few times, and said, "Is it the bathroom?" Hurry up and send someone here. After a while, a beautiful sanitary officer came to check on Old Man Zhuang's health. It's stethoscope again, and it's pulse count again. After checking, it's okay, everyone feels relieved.
Company commander picked up the phone again, shook it a few times, and said, "What about the kitchen?" Make a bowl of noodles soup, add more ginger, and make a few poached eggs." After a while, a large bowl of steaming egg noodles came up. After dinner, Old Man Zhuang slept beautifully and smacked his lips. It was so good! I thought again that the treasure box in the army is so good. I can get whatever I want after a few shakes. I might as well stop waiting for my son here and stealing the treasure. When they were asleep at night, Old Man Zhuang quietly slipped to the company office, jumped into the window, stole the phone, and took the train to go home.
The next day the troops found that the old man was missing, and there were many other things, but the office telephone was missing. The company commander said that it was probably because the old man wanted to take this thing away, so he didn't say anything, and it would be good for anyone to spread it. Besides, Old Man Zhuang returned home in the middle of the night, and his wife asked if she had seen her son? The old man said he didn't see it, but I got the treasure, which is the legendary treasure gourd, and I have whatever I want. So he inserted it into the door, blocked the window with a quilt, carefully exited the phone, shook it a few times, and said, "Give me a bowl of and whipped !" After waiting for a long time, there was no movement. After shaking, there was still no movement. Old Man Zhuang sighed and said, "This baby recognizes people."
Zhuang Tiedan was active in the army. He got up in the pigpen at noon on a hot day. He was about to catch the leader going down to the company and went to the toilet to shit after dinner. When he heard someone below, he came out and saw someone sweating and forking the man out. Several pigs were humming and urging him, making the man dirty all over. The man was calm and calm and fucked slowly. The leader admired when he watched for a long time, and said, "Such a good soldier needs to be promoted!" So Zhuang Tiedan was raised, and later he returned to the county to arrange work and eat imperial grain to become a cadre.
(To be continued)
