I am the Grand Duke next to the Emperor, and my first task is to persuade the Emperor to choose a concubine and have children to extend his heirs.
But the emperor seemed to have no interest in this.
Until one day, I went to bring him tea and water, and he suddenly held my hand and said solemnly -
"Are you a boy or a girl?"
1.
"I heard that the emperor is fond of Longyang?"
"Is it true?! No wonder there is no concubine in the harem, and the only one beside the emperor is that little father-in-law..."
Hearing this, I was shocked, and the hand that was eating the pastry trembled slightly. Because I am that Mr. Wu.
The pastries in the imperial dining room are really delicious... I didn't come here to eat on purpose... and I didn't mean to eavesdrop on...
"Eunuch Wu, Mr. Wu?!" The person who was talking happily just now turned around and saw I was caught stealing food, and I was so frightened that I couldn't speak clearly, and quickly knelt down towards me.
" Father-in-law ! What we just said is nonsense, please don't take it to heart!"
I stood up straight with a fake smile and said to them hahahaha: "Don't take it seriously, the Zajia family doesn't take it seriously, ah... The Emperor still has something for the Zajia family to take care of, so... are you leaving first?"
I said hesitantly taking steps forward, and they followed my movement. Changing the direction of kneeling and worshiping made me dumbfounded.
I was walking on the official road, munching pastries and thinking, "How does the emperor like Longyang?"
I thought about it, and it seems that there are indeed some signs.
As the Grand Duke next to the Emperor, I will naturally receive entrustments from ministers. Usually the entrustments will be accompanied by golden rewards, which is nothing more than to persuade the Emperor to accept the concubine and appoint the queen as soon as possible.
I am a diligent worker, so I am not too concerned about it. I searched for a long time before putting hundreds of high-quality full-body pictures of beautiful women that could make me see nosebleeds in front of the emperor. He picks.
As a result, the emperor was calm throughout the whole process, but his eyes kept glancing at me. I thought for a while that he was unhappy with me.
Is it a good Longyang? !!
I am so dangerous.
I wiped my hands stained with pastry crumbs with the imperial edict and walked towards the palace gate.
"See Eunuch Wu." The soldier guarding the gate bowed his hand to me.
I took out the token and gave it to him with a smile, "Thank you for all the hard work."
"Eunuch Wu is going to leave the palace?"
"Oh, I'm going to declare a decree..." I raised the holy paper in my hand. Before the words were finished, the imperial edict was so frightening that all the soldiers knelt down with a pop, "See the emperor!"
I followed their eyes in dumbfounded words, "..."
Gan, I forgot that seeing the imperial edict was like seeing the emperor. Damn set up.
I silently hid my right hand holding the edict behind my back.
The soldiers then stood up, "It turns out that this is the decree, thank you for your hard work, Eunuch Wu."
I smiled and frowned, and subconsciously raised my right hand to wave to them, "Then bye first..."
"See Your Majesty !!!!" The soldiers saw the imperial edict coming out again, and there was a uniform popping sound. I think they were about to cry.
left me standing there, messy in the wind.
I pursed my lips, this world is hopeless.
I carried the imperial edict in my arms and walked slowly.
"Boss, give me two taels of melon seeds." I handed the broken silver to the fried melon seeds store.
looked at the busy streets around him and had to say that the emperor was an excellent manager.
Guangyang City is so prosperous and indestructible, of course it is thanks to the emperor... and me who is beside him to give advice.
When the new emperor ascended the throne, he had no close associates around him. He only brought a thin little father-in-law with him, and he occupied the court at a very ambitious speed.
Yes, that little father-in-law is me!
In just one month, with my assistance, the new emperor secured his throne, and even gathered a number of forces to help the emperor replace all forces with his own.
Ah, of course, it’s not thanks to the emperor’s original connections that he gave me room for development.
I was eating melon seeds while walking. The emperor and I met at a mass grave.
I went to pick up the body, but his body was dumped.
I took off his clothes endlessly, and then I was caught off guard and looked at each other, a little embarrassed.
Then, this guy ate my food for two weeks in vain, finished all the pork I had finally hoarded, and even disliked me for keeping him thin.
pisses me off.
But he was handsome, so I was tricked into becoming his subordinate by his saying "Come with me to protect your prosperity and wealth".
It is true to be prosperous and wealthy, and it is also true to work as a humble worker.
But speaking of it, the emperor did not treat me badly. He gave me generous rewards, and he did not restrict me from kneeling to him. He tolerated me in every way, unless he recognized me as a man.
I tightened my belt and walked towards Prince Yi's Mansion.
The gatekeeper recognized me at a glance and greeted me enthusiastically: "Isn't this Mr. Wu?"
I smiled and held my hands, very mature. He nodded to them, "Is King Yi here? Your Majesty has an edict to be announced."
When the retainers heard that they were here to issue an edict, their expressions instantly became frightened. They quickly opened the door and said to me, "Yes, yes, then. Must be here, sir Go this way."
I walked all the way to the main hall. King Yi had been waiting in the main hall for a long time. When he saw me coming, his eyes lit up, "Wusu!"
I'm still Wuhu , I pursed my lips and gave a professional fake smile, shook out the imperial edict from my sleeve, raised my voice and said, "Wang Yi heard the announcement——"
Wang Yi obediently knelt down in front of me.
"By God's blessing, the emperor issued an edict saying that King Yi had a meritorious service in escorting him the day before yesterday. He was given an official robe with a python pattern, ten thousand taels of gold, and a hundred acres of land..."
I squinted my eyes and struggled to read the words, "Look... Hope..."
Gan, I will discuss this with the Emperor next time and find a different writer.
I rolled my eyes, accepted the imperial edict, threw the reward package from my arms to Wang Yi, turned around and said, "The emperor means that you have done a good job and praise you. 666, continue from now on, okay, the announcement is over, I’m going to slip away, just send your retainers into the palace to go to the treasury to count according to the number on the document."
King Yi threw the imperial edict and the document to the retainer, and quickly stood up and stopped me, " Wusu, wait, wait, you’re here, why don’t you stay and have a meal before leaving?"
I squinted my eyes and looked at him, and said slowly: "Are you tempting me?"
Wang Yi was stunned, "Ah?"
I was also stunned, "Ah."
Didn't he bribe me with delicious food to help him? Can you say something nice in front of the eldest princess?
Am I mistaken?
How embarrassing.
2.
This meal made me really uncomfortable.
Wang Yi is a good brother of the emperor. The two of them usually work together in collusion and do big things with reckless abandon. I remember, the person who picked up the emperor and me from the mass grave was Wang Yi.
seems to be called...Lu Chengwen?
"Little Eunuch Wusu, I want to ask you something." Lu Chengwen smiled very treacherously and asked while picking up the food for me.
I looked at the tall buildings in my bowl and coughed lightly, "Wang Yi, just ask."
I picked up a piece of green vegetables and was about to put it into my mouth when Lu Chengwen spoke.
"I would like to ask... Is Xie Tingxu really cut off his sleeves?!!!!" He shook, causing the miserable piece of green vegetables on my chopsticks to fall to the ground and let out a wailing sound.
The servants standing guard around him couldn't hold back and burst out laughing.
I was silent, raised my eyes to look at Lu Chengwen, looked down at my green vegetable with resentment, and sighed, "His Royal Highness King Yi, that is the emperor, please don't call me by name."
"Oh." Lu Chengwen said wilted , and continued to ask without giving up: "So is Lao Xie really cut off his sleeves?"
I twisted my face, He answered cautiously: "For the time being... right? Those are all rumors and slander. His Highness King Yi doesn't need to take it seriously."
Lu Chengwen curled his lips, "It's not what I want to ask. I'm just preparing for a rainy day. He should stay away from the court, lest I be betrayed by him, which would make me feel sick for a long time. "
Yes, relatives and friends are quarreling with each other every day.
Xie Tingxu is the emperor's name. He and Lu Chengwen disliked each other from childhood until they grew up. They cursed each other, but in fact they still helped each other until today.
I just smiled.
Should I tell Lu Chengwen that Xie Tingxu called him a sissy?
I should be torn to pieces by Xie Tingxu, right?
Let’s not talk about it.
After dinner, I was about to go home, but Lu Chengwen stopped me and asked me to get on the carriage.
"It just so happens that I have nothing to do, so I'm going to go see Xie Tingxu to play." Lu Chengwen fell asleep.
I couldn't help but ask: "Aren't you afraid that the emperor's sleeves are really cut off?"
Lu Chengwen shook at a speed visible to the naked eye, and then said with a fake smile: "What are you afraid of? Xie Tingxu and I have been together since childhood. We have such a big friendship, if he really had thoughts about my beautiful body, would he beat me so badly when he was a child? ”
too, I couldn’t help laughing.
could see that Lu Chengwen hated Xie Tingxu so much that his teeth itched with hatred.
The carriage stopped at the entrance of the palace, and the guard shouted softly from outside: "Your Highness King Yi, the carriage is not allowed to enter the palace."
Lu Chengwen clicked his tongue and made a gesture to get off the carriage. I stopped him with my hand, and under Lu Chengwen's probing eyes I raised the curtain.
When the guard outside saw it was me, he quickly waved to let me go, "It's Eunuch Wu, get out of the way!"
I smiled and nodded to the guard to express my gratitude.
"Yo yo yo." Lu Chengwen smiled without knowing the meaning, "Eunuch Wu is so proud that the carriage can enter the palace."
I laughed so hard, "You know nothing."
Lu Chengwen was stunned. , also shut up.
"His Royal Highness King Yi is going to meet the eldest princess?" I looked at him sideways, "I guess your Highness is not really going to see the emperor, is he?"
Lu Chengwen's lips turned into a smile, "Or Wusu, you understand me. . "
"Your Highness King Yi, the eldest princess is arrogant and has an unusually high vision. You must exercise caution." I reminded him very tactfully.
Lu Chengwen blinked and said: "It's okay, it's okay, I will definitely work hard."
I hesitated to speak, but said: "Actually, there is a legitimate lady in the Jiang family, whose appearance and character are both top-notch, you Would you like to meet up? Can I arrange it for you?
Lu Chengwen touched his chin and said: "I know that you are testing my determination towards the eldest princess. Don't worry, I will definitely persist!"
I couldn't hold it back, so I yelled: "Do you have to tell me that the eldest princess doesn't like you before you understand what I mean!!!"
Lu Chengwen was stunned.
I shut up immediately.
There is one more sad person in this palace.
"You..." Lu Chengwen stared at me coldly.
I swallowed, my brain was organizing words like crazy.
Unexpectedly, Lu Chengwen's eyes turned red and he cried extremely ugly: "What you said is really hurtful..."
I "..."
I'm all crazy.
3.
When I walked outside Yangxin Hall, two little palace ladies ran towards me with panic on their faces, "Eunuch Wu! You are finally back!"
I saw that their expressions were wrong, so I comforted them a little before asking: "What happened to the Emperor?"
"The Emperor did not eat at noon! He also lost his temper!" The two little palace ladies He looked terrified.
I pursed my lips speechlessly, but still maintained my good image, nodded and said to them: "Okay, I understand, you can go and do your own business first."
I waited until the two little palace ladies left and then sighed, Walking towards Yangxin Hall, I saw the eunuch carrying dishes at the door. The eunuch was looking troubled, but he was relieved when he saw me coming.
"What is this?" I asked.
The little eunuch whispered: "Back to Eunuch Wu, the emperor did not eat today and lost his temper. The imperial dining room is in a hurry. Eunuch Wu, please whisper something, is it our imperial dining room ht How could ml2 not be to the emperor's liking?"
I smiled, took the dish in his hand, opened the lid, and a fresh aroma came out. It's not wrong, Xie Tingxu just likes to eat some flavor. Why is the heavy soup not to your liking?
I am afraid that Xie Tingxu is sick again.
I let the little eunuch go first, turned around, knocked on the door a few times, and called twice, but no one answered. I lowered my eyes and waited for about ten seconds before pushing the door open and walking in.
Sure enough, the man sitting on the dragon chair was staring at the door expectantly. As soon as I opened the door, he immediately lowered his head and pretended to be concentrating on reviewing the memorial, but did not raise his eyes to look at me.
poor acting.
I looked at Xie Tingxu’s overturned brush and was speechless. Xie Tingxu was really childish.
"Your Majesty, enjoy your meal." I put the soup in his hand.
Xie Tingxu didn’t say anything, he just turned sideways without facing me while holding the memorial in his hand.
I tolerate it.
I put on a smile, bent down and picked up the soup cup and handed it to his mouth, "Your Majesty, you are the king of a country. It is not good for your health not to eat. If your health is not good, you cannot sacrifice your life for the country... Ah, no, It's for the sake of the country."
Xie Tingxu still ignored me, just glanced at me coolly, and continued to treat me like nothing.
The corners of my mouth twitched and I asked softly: "Your Majesty, are you feeling unwell? Or are you in a bad mood?"
Xie Tingxu snorted again, "The second one."
I blinked, talking to me is not okay. Is it easy to handle?
"Are you in a bad mood? Why?" I asked with a smile.
I think I can dig myself out of the Forbidden City in embarrassment. My tone of voice is too disgusting.
Xie Tingxu turned around faintly, and then said: "Why didn't you return to the palace at noon? Does it take that long to deliver a message? Look at what time it is now?! Have you stayed in Prince Yi's Mansion for so long?!"
I was He was inexplicably fierce, and the hand holding the soup trembled slightly.
Common people don’t know, common people don’t understand.
I just announced a simple message, and Lu Chengwen simply invited me to have a meal.
What's going on?
Is it possible...
I raised my eyebrows, and that sentence rang in my mind.
I heard that the emperor was fond of Long Yang...
I heard that the emperor was fond of Long Yang...
The emperor was fond of Long Yang...
I was fond of Long Yang...
Good Long Yang...
Long Yang...
Yang...
looked towards Xie Ting Xu's resentful eyes made me realize.
I couldn't help but smile bitterly and explain: "This, Your Majesty, please listen to my explanation."
Xie Tingxu gave a very pretentious snort and threw the memorial in his hand far away. I silently mourned for the memorial that was thrown away.
Xie Tingxu nodded and said, "Tell me, I will listen to your quibbles."
I thrust the soup cup into his hand and said with a smile, "Then, Your Majesty, just listen to me while you drink."
Thank you Tingxu was silent and began to drink soup one bite at a time.
I feel comfortable now. As long as this brother is willing to eat, I will feel at ease. "That's it. His Highness King Yi just invited me to have a meal and nothing happened. Of course, I rarely talk to him, ah , and there was no physical contact."
Xie Tingxu raised his eyebrows, " "Seriously?"
I nodded like a chicken pecking at rice, "Really, really! Pearls are not as real as mine."
"Then I also heard that you entered the palace in a carriage with Lu Chengwen, in the same carriage, Eunuch Wu, It's so intimate!" I can taste Xie Tingxu's jealousy.
I was a bit blind, and I was frantically thinking of ways to remedy this.
It’s over, it’s over, the emperor is not really a broken sleeve, right? !
What should I do if I am to die immediately? ! I have received honoraria from all the ministers!
I waved my hands repeatedly and said: "Although we are in the same carriage, I really didn't do anything with His Highness King Yi. He is far away from me, and we rarely talk."
Xie Tingxu snorted coldly, "Looks like I need to give Lu Chengwen a warning. I think he will get to know people when he meets them in the future."
Hiss - I was three parts shocked, three parts nauseated and four parts holy shit.
What kind of speech by a domineering president is this? ! Isn't this just plain jealous of Lu Chengwen?
I raised my eyebrows, and a picture instantly appeared in my mind: Xie Tingxu was full of anger on the chair, blasting the melon seeds in my head with a gun, then grabbed the frail His Highness King Yi and said: "Oh! Wener! You can only be mine! Don't get close to others! 』
Then Lu Chengwen burst into tears, covering his face and crying very delicately, and his voice came out of the eighteen bends of the mountain road: "Ah!" Xu'er! Why are you so stupid! I've always been yours! Wusu is not worth mentioning at all! Not worth mentioning! 』
imagine the end.
Yes, I feel a little nauseous. Co-authored by
I am an atmosphere instigator.
I mourn for Lu Chengwen and myself.
Thinking of Lu Chengwen's very confident look, he said brazenly that Xie Tingxu would not be interested in him. It's fine now. Xie Tingxu could get angry just by hearing someone riding in the same carriage as him. After dinner, you have to "warn" him.
is finished, Lu Chengwen is finished.
I am a little confused. Should I ask directly?
I brainstormed for a while, but I still think it’s better not to ask. It’s a small matter if the emperor loses face, but it’s a big deal if he wants to chop off my head when he gets angry!
Since the emperor has really lost his sleeve, I will play my role and block the ministers' idea of forcing Xie Tingxu to become a concubine as soon as possible, so that the emperor and Lu Chengwen can have an easier time.
I said to Xie Tingxu very excitedly: "Your Majesty, don't worry, I will definitely help you and His Highness King Yi!"
Xie Tingxu didn't take a sip of the soup, because he was stunned and it overflowed from the corner of his mouth.
doesn't look too smart.
"Huh?"
4.
"Really?!" the eldest princess screamed.
I was so frightened that I covered her mouth and said, "Lower your voice!"
The eldest princess nodded quickly, lowered her voice and asked, "Does my emperor brother really have a broken sleeve?!"
I looked confused. He said, "Don't spread this matter to the outside world yet. We are not sure yet. We need to observe for some time."
The eldest princess rubbed her hands with excitement, "Who is this person? Do I know him?"
Me He nodded and sighed, "That's His Highness King Yi.
The expression of the eldest princess suddenly became subtle, "Oh~ no wonder he often comes to the palace, and it's not for me that he does it for a long time. His original intention is to care for my brother~"
I sighed and said seriously: " Today, the Emperor was very angry when he learned that His Highness King Yi and I were riding in the same carriage. He can't even eat anymore, which shows that he is so affectionate."
The eldest princess looked touched, "Really? I've long heard that the emperor's brother is a seductress, but I didn't expect him to be so serious and affectionate."
" I've been helping him for so long, but I haven't noticed it yet." I sighed one after another.
The eldest princess pulled me to sit down and said: "I once thought that the emperor's brother was not close to women because you were around, but now it seems that he was afraid that Lu Chengwen would be jealous and did not dare to bring men around."
I nodded seriously: "When I showed the draft chart to the emperor, he was so angry that smoke was coming out of his head."
The eldest princess smiled with crooked eyebrows and asked me: "Then, Su Su, do you have to dress up as a man for the rest of your life for the happiness of the emperor's brother?"
My eyes were filled with tears and I said, "Labour and management don't want to either. 》
Who wants to dress up as a man all the time? !
I am just a small person, but I have breasts and a butt. Is it too harmful to wear a corset every day? !
I also want to release my breasts and crotch, and let the wind blow my butt, but the emperor doesn’t allow it!
Who is Xie Tingxu? The man who killed a thousand swords was a little brother at the mass grave. I was too lazy to pay attention to him at first, but later I found out that he was a prince, so I didn’t dare to refute him. Xie Tingxu is so dirty-minded. Very, who knows if he will say that I deceived him and then took my life.
I originally wanted to get him out of the mass grave, but I couldn't resist the temptation and was tricked here for money. Who knew that he would become an emperor in one leap? Do I dare to say that I am not a man? Who dares? !
If someone says that I deliberately disguised myself as a man to hide beside the emperor, then I am a vixen. Nine lives are not enough for me to die.
My current idea is very simple, honestly save money and go to work.
Xie Tingxu and I had a written agreement that when I was twenty-five years old, I would be released from the palace and secluded in the fields.
I am just twenty now, and there are still five years left.
I must at least survive these five years, right?
The eldest princess patted me on the shoulder, "It's too difficult, sister..."
A palace maid came in to replace the tea, which scared the eldest princess and changed her tone: "... Sister, hello! Five leaders! Six, six, six. ! "
I almost died laughing.
The eldest princess punched me with a red face.
The next thing is to clear the road and keep it warm.
Lu Chengwen seems to be very resistant to the emperor. As the emperor’s good helper, I, Wu Su, the chief eunuch around the emperor, am here to help the emperor solve his problems!
The eldest princess and I worked together and stopped Lu Chengwen’s carriage on the official road. The guard didn’t know what to do. The eldest princess and I just raised the curtain and talked to the people inside. Lu Chengwen, who was rubbing his face, met his gaze.
I was stunned, "Your Highness King Yi, what's wrong with your face?"
Lu Chengwen was humming, and when I asked him, he felt like his hair was boiling. : "You're still asking me?! Ask your family Xie Tingxu! He hit me! He actually hit me! He's finished! I will never reconcile with him again! Let's break off our relationship for one night!"
The eldest princess and I Look at each other.
Me: It’s over, it seems that Lu Chengwen rebelled against the emperor.
Eldest Princess: It’s okay, the young couple is arguing at the head of the bed and at the end of the bed. What we have to do is to sort out his feelings for my royal brother first!
I nodded seriously: It makes sense.
So the eldest princess and I tied up Lu Chengwen.
"Wusu! What's wrong with you?! This rope hurts so much!" Lu Chengwen looked at the rope tied to his body with a "wh" look on his face.
I shrugged, "I suggested tying it with cloth strips. It was the eldest princess who decided to use thick rope."
Lu Chengwen looked at the eldest princess who was snickering in disbelief, "Qingxian, why? ! "I didn't make you angry today!"
Oh, yes, the eldest princess is called Xie Qingxian. She is very leisurely. She only writes about me and the emperor all day long. Now it's better, and the target has become Lu Chengwen and Xie Ting. Maybe, she seems to be more energetic.
Xie Qingxian snorted and threatened with the rope in his hand, "Are you serious that you didn't make me angry?"
Lu Chengwen tried to help me, but I just shook my head silently, with an expression that said he was hopeless. Somewhat desperate.
"Hey, are you two teasing me? I am a Yi Wang after all!" Lu Chengwen stopped struggling and just kept accusing.
Xie Qingxian clicked his tongue and shook his head, "Lu Chengwen, are you pretending not to understand? You made my royal brother angry today. If you made my royal brother angry, wouldn't you just make me angry?"
路Chengwen's expression was a little distorted, "What kind of nonsense is this?! Xie Tingxu had a fight with me out of nowhere today, and I don't even know what happened, okay?!"
I sighed, "Your Highness King Yi, do you really not know why the emperor is angry?"
Lu Chengwen hesitated: "I... of course I know, but I can't tell you."
I She patted his shoulder sincerely, "It's okay, we all understand, understand, understand."
Xie Qingxian also nodded matter-of-factly.
Lu Chengwen was stunned for a few seconds, and then he stormed out: "You know a pineapple!!!!"
There was an angry person in this palace.
5.
The emperor began to sigh.
He had been irritable for no reason throughout the entire court.
The ministers in the hall were so angry that they did not dare to express their anger, and they all turned to me for help.
I coughed lightly, raised my voice and said: "If you have a book to start the performance, you will retreat without a book -"
"The performance will start later." Xie Tingxu spoke.
I didn’t move, and Xie Tingxu said, “I’ll retreat later.”
I didn’t move, and I looked at Xie Tingxu looking at me playfully. , said: "My dear friends, you are also very considerate of me. I heard that you have been worrying about my heirs?"
The people in the court knelt on the ground and said in unison: "I am terrified!!"
I saw that Xie Tingxu showed no sign of being angry, so I whispered: "Your Majesty, what are you doing?"
Xie Tingxu snorted and lowered his voice, "These old guys bother you every day, don't you think I know that?" ? They don't have to worry about me, so don't worry about getting a concubine. "
My expression was very exciting at the moment.
If you don’t accept a concubine, are you planning to marry Lu Chengwen?
As soon as my idea was formed, Lu Chengwen in the hall sneezed solidly.
He rubbed his nose and scratched his head inexplicably.
I pursed my lips. Could it be that the emperor had been worrying about how to refuse the concubine all morning, so he sighed?
When Xie Tingxu saw that I was ignoring him, he curled his lips, waved his hand and said: "My dear friends, please stop worrying about the concubines in the harem, and don't bother my Wu Su, she has to be busy all day long. A lot. Those of you who are causing trouble should stop bothering her."
I have a black line on my face. This Xie Tingxu who killed a thousand swords, he doesn't want to be a human being, but I still want to be a human being. When he says this, doesn't it make others think that I am chewing my tongue?
But I wanted to think about it, and I still had a smile on my face: "The emperor's words are serious, and the ministers all have the heart of serving the emperor. Wusu naturally responded positively, why would he dislike it and add trouble?"
"So, my Is Wusu very concerned about this?" Xie Tingxu asked confused.
I quietly rolled my eyes, "Yes."
Xie Tingxu was a little happier, "Retreat from the court!"
The ministers wiped their cold sweat and bowed to me before tremblingly exiting the hall. .
After Lu Chengwen winked at me, he hurried out of the hall and even turned around and closed the door.
I glanced at Xie Tingxu and found that he was looking at me.
"Does the Emperor have any instructions for Wu Su?" I pretended to be innocent and tilted my head to ask him.
Xie Tingxu stopped laughing, coughed uncomfortably, and said, "Pour me a cup of tea."
I put on a professional fake smile, picked up the teapot, poured half a cup of hot tea, and tested the temperature on the back of my hand. He filled some more cold water and put it in front of Xie Tingxu, "Your Majesty, please."
Xie Tingxu drank it After taking a sip, he smiled and said, "Your temperature is stuck."
I smiled, "After all, I have been doing this for almost two years."
Xie Tingxu nodded, stood up, and walked towards me step by step Come on, "You have been with me for two years."
There is no change on my face, but I am screaming in my heart.
What are you going to do!!! I didn’t stand with your little lover today! I didn’t communicate with him! Whose jealousy are you taking?
Xie Tingxu’s eyes moved slightly and he looked at the bookshelves on both sides of the hall. Zi, said: "Wusu help me find a book Let's see?"
I stepped back slightly and said, "I hope the emperor will tell me the title of the book."
Xie Tingxu lowered his voice: ""Lovesickness Dictionary"."
My heart skipped a beat.
Because Xie Tingxu raised his hand and pinched my earlobe, "Why are Wusu's ears so red?"
I raised my eyebrows slightly and said, "Your Majesty, I will go find a book for you right now."
I ran away. Xie Tingxu was looking for books carefully.
"Lovesickness Dictionary", I remember putting it on it.
I looked up and it was a bit high. I turned around and moved a wooden ladder. After climbing two sections, I saw the red book.
A pair of hands stretched out, one hand was pressed on the wooden ladder to protect me, and the other hand was raised and touched my raised neck.
His cold fingers traced along my neck, slowly moved up, and finally stopped at my chin. He pinched my chin fiercely and pulled me towards his face.
I was distracted for a moment, but the moment I was forced to bend down by him, I grabbed the "Lovesickness Dictionary".
The moment Xie Tingxu was about to kiss him in the next second, I put the "Lovesickness Dictionary" between me and him.
perfect defense.
I smiled harmlessly: "Thank you, Your Majesty, for protecting me. I found the book."
Xie Tingxu silently took the "Lovesickness Dictionary" in my hand, "Oh, you are awesome, do you want me to give you a reward?"
I shook my head with a smile, "It's my duty, I don't dare to take credit."
Xie Tingxu turned around irritably.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
Xie Tingxu is a gay, absolutely.
He actually wanted to forcefully kiss me. Has Lu Chengwen’s temptation to him expired?
man.
haha.
I snorted and jumped down from the wooden ladder obediently and followed Xie Tingxu.
I looked at Xie Tingxu's feet and asked silently: "Your Majesty, I want to ask you something."
"I can't make love without eating, drinking, sleeping, or getting tired." Xie Tingxu spat out a sentence in one breath.
I was stunned, "No, I'm not asking these things."
Xie Tingxu flipped through the dictionary and looked up at me, "What does Susu want to ask?"
Are you tired of Lu Chengwen?
Do you like a boy or a girl? I can arrange it easily!
I struggled for a while and asked bravely: "Your Majesty, are you unhappy today because His Highness King Yi is ignoring you? Don't worry, King Yi. Your Highness has not yet thought of how to respond to your feelings. If you like him so much, he will I understand. If he doesn’t understand, I will let him understand.”
Xie Tingxu was stunned and smashed the dictionary on the ground in anger, “Wu Su! I’m sorry you have been trying to bring me and Lu Chengwen together these days. I just believed other people’s rumors and thought I was a piece of shit!!”
I was startled.
? Isn't
?
"Then you... were angry that His Highness King Yi was riding in a carriage with me two days ago. If you didn't like His Highness King Yi, how could you be jealous of His Highness King Yi?"
Xie Tingxu covered his heart and said, I want to eat me alive His expression: "That's it! That's... Oh, Wusu, you idiot!"
He grabbed my shoulders and began to shake me to death. He said while shaking me: "I am not a broken sleeve! I like women. Of! Female! Do you know?」
I was shaken so much that I felt like vomiting, and nodded repeatedly, "I know, I know..."
Xie Tingxu let go with satisfaction, "I know, then do you know what to do?"
I suppressed the discomfort in my heart. , Nodding, "I got it."
Xie Tingxu then smiled, and gradually came closer to me, bending down slightly, his lips getting closer and closer to me... getting closer...
The atmosphere became ambiguous, Xie Tingxu's eyes All tainted with a little expectation.
I thought about it and said, "...it's time to arrange a draft girl for you."
Xie Tingxu was petrified on the spot.
There is one more crazy person in this palace.
"Wusu!!! Get out of here!!!"
Okay.
I feel so good. Looking at beautiful women really makes me feel good.
6.
I'm going to do something big.
I looked at the Yingying Yanyan standing in front of me and tried hard to suppress my smile. The Emperor's sleeves are not cut off. Finally, I can finally audition! I can finally see beauties! I finally don't have to face Xie Tingxu's picture every day. I'm so embarrassed!
"I've seen Eunuch Wu——" The beauties all saluted me.
I smiled and waved to them, and the palace maid led them to the Xiu Nu Pavilion. I held a thick album in my hand and walked towards the Yangxin Palace.
I have to show it to Xie Tingxu first...
As soon as I opened the door, my face turned green.
Xie Tingxu and Lu Chengwen fell on the dragon chair with their fingers intertwined, their clothes were messy and they were panting.
Lu Chengwen was at the bottom and Xie Tingxu was at the top. Lu Chengwen's face was even red. Overall, the atmosphere was ambiguous and indescribable.
Hiss——
The three of us took a breath at the same time.
Xie Tingxu: "What the hell?"
Lu Chengwen: "What the hell!"
Me: "What the hell!!!!"
And you said you are not a broken sleeve? !
It’s over. I’m afraid I won’t live to be twenty-five if I disturb the Emperor’s good deeds.
I turned around decisively and was about to leave. Xie Tingxu jumped up and grabbed me when I was stimulated.
"Susu! Susu!" He grabbed my wrist and pulled the show girl album in my hand, which fell to the ground and was smashed open.
When Xie Tingxu looked at the photo album of beautiful women, his expression changed. "You still want to show me a woman?!"
I looked like I was eating shit, "I don't, I'm not, I don't know. , Your Majesty, you are wrong, that is a picture of an erotic palace, not a picture of a beautiful girl."
Damn it, are you a broken sleeve? Yesterday you said you weren't. I'm showing off the ladies today, and you and Lu Chengwen are having sex in the Yangxin Hall. I even offended you by co-authoring it!
Stinky Affection Couple!
Xie Tingxu gritted his teeth, Lu Chengwen silently pressed against the wall and tried to sneak out, but I quickly grabbed his hair with my sharp eyes, and I roared miserably: "Don't leave me!!"
Then My expression suddenly changed, I smiled and handed Lu Chengwen to Xie Tingxu, "Your Majesty, Wu Su will not disturb the two of you. The ladies will be dismissed immediately. It is impossible to stuff women into the harem. King Yi Don’t be jealous, Your Highness, hahaha, the male queen... It’s not impossible, hahaha..."
Lu Chengwen shouted: "What's going on with you! What does it have to do with me?! You grab me and beat me every day! Wusu, just promise Xie Tingxu... uhhhhhh!"
Lu Chengwen hasn't said anything yet. After that, Xie Tingxu covered his mouth.
Xie Tingxu’s eyes could kill, "Get out!"
I turned around and ran away.
Xie Tingxu is a gay guy.
True!
I met Xie Qingxian in the Imperial Garden.
She looked at me gradually and strangely.
I'm all covered in hair.
"What?" I rubbed my hands.
Xie Qingxian smiled with an unclear meaning, and then looked around, "Susu, do you know who my brother likes?"
Hehe, why didn't I know? I just ruined Xie Tingxu and him. Good deeds from your sweetheart.
"I know, I know this all the more clearly in my life." I was discouraged. This father-in-law's position is not easy to sit in at all. I want to retire early.
Xie Qingxian whispered: "I heard something last night."
I raised my eyebrows, "What words."
Xie Qingxian squeezed to my side He sat down and said, "Last night, I went to the Yangxin Hall to find Brother Huang, and I overheard the conversation between him and Lu Chengwen."
"I didn't listen to the whole story, but I caught the key points."
I have something bad to say. premonition.
Xie Qingxian said: "The person my brother likes is a woman. He is not Duanxiu. He hides and communicates with Lu Chengwen every day just to plot how to chase that person. But listening to their content, there should be no progress."
I pursed my lips, I no longer believed in this world. Let
be destroyed.
It doesn’t matter whether Xie Tingxu is gay or not, whether he likes women or men, I can’t live with this black father-in-law for a day.
"Really? I don't believe it." I smiled slightly, "Just now, the Emperor and His Highness King Yi were having an affair in the Yangxin Palace. Not to mention how exciting it was."
Xie Qingxian's eyes lit up and he smiled. Get up, "Seriously?!"
I nodded.
I feel like my outlook on life has been impacted.
night.
Yangxin Palace.
I am three feet away from the emperor.
Xie Tingxu was approving the memorial. He couldn't stand it anymore. He raised his head and looked at me from a distance, "Wusu, do I have body odor?"
I gave him a cool look and said, "I'm going back to the emperor. I'm afraid I have."
"It's okay if you do. I like it. Come over here." Xie Tingxu tried to be unreasonable.
My voice had no fluctuation, and I said without emotion: "No, Your Majesty, I'm afraid my body odor is poisonous."
Xie Tingxu choked for a moment, and continued to criticize the memorial honestly.
The Yangxin Hall was quiet for a while. Xie Tingxu raised his head and said, "It was not what you thought during the day. Lu Chengwen and I were fighting..."
I looked at him mechanically, "Oh."
No matter what It's not true, I don't care.
You and Lu Chengwen can do whatever they want.
If you die alone or widowed, please forgive me.
Xie Tingxu went berserk: "It was a real fight!"
I rolled my eyes, "I didn't say you were pretending to fight.”
Xie Tingxu gave up and lowered his head to approve the memorial.
After criticizing him, he didn't give up. He raised his head and said, "I really like women, not men."
I ignored him.
This man is so noisy.
Xie Tingxu shouted: "Wusu! Did you hear me?! I like women!"
I said perfunctorily: "Yeah, okay, okay, okay, so do you want His Highness King Yi to enter the palace tomorrow?"
Xie Tingxu is honest : "Yes."
I am speechless, isn't this necessary?
Xie Tingxu scratched his head irritably and said, "Do you really want to give me a woman?"
I looked at him with an expression of "Are you stupid?"
Damn it, I have already selected my sisters into the palace. You ask me if I want to give you a woman?
Xie Tingxu gritted his teeth and said, "Okay, if you like to give me women, I will accept a few hundred of them so that you can have them all at once! This will prevent you from thinking that I am a cut-off woman who likes Lu Chengwen every day."
Then I smiled in victory.
wins completely.
7.
On the draft day, the emperor fell asleep sitting on the dragon throne.
I glanced at Xie Tingxu, who was sleeping with his head tilted upward. I felt a little embarrassed and asked the palace officials to place a screen in front of Xie Tingxu to cover him. Xie Tingxu's image still needed to be maintained.
The little maid next to me, Xia He, shouted loudly: "The next one, No. 67, Jiang Yuansu!"
I raised my eyes and looked up, and the woman who came out was wearing a blue shirt, and she looked very uncontested. There was a hint of coldness in her quiet, delicate face. I noticed it at a glance and drew a bright red circle on her name list.
said that he wanted to give Xie Ting hundreds of promises, but in fact it was impossible. We had to consider the woman's background and family, and after picking and choosing only three.
But it’s okay. If you come in batches, you can always turn the harem into a harem with three thousand beauties.
I was deeply aware of the huge workload and sighed.
The emperor who killed a thousand swords was snoring slightly at the moment.
After everyone in the palace had left, I brought a thin blanket and put it on Xie Tingxu's body, then stood beside him quietly and waited.
Xie Tingxu suddenly started coughing, one after another, getting more and more intense.
My heart trembled, and I quickly brought tea and patted his back gently, "Your Majesty, are you okay?"
Xie Tingxu took a sip of tea, nodded, looked at me, and suddenly smiled, " your reaction can The power is really fast."
I laughed, "After all, it has been two years."
"Do you know that staying with a king for two years cannot gain the trust of a king." Xie Tingxu Wu said.
I put the tea set away, stood next to Xie Tingxu, and nodded: "But, Your Majesty, you brought me from the mountains to the court when you had nothing to do."
Xie Tingxu laughed, "I thought you understood. 》
I pretended to be stupid, "I don't understand anything, I'm just an ordinary little eunuch."
Unexpectedly, Xie Tingxu looked at me and catered to me in a serious manner, "Hmm."
I said Stunned, I suddenly had the idea of rebellion.
"How many did you choose?" Xie Tingxu stretched.
I took the roster aside and handed it to Xie Tingxu, "These three are all top candidates."
"Oh? Really?" Xie Tingxu looked at it meaningfully, then raised his eyebrows slightly and pointed. Pointing at one of them, "I don't have to worry about the person Wu Su chooses. Let her sleep with her tonight."
Are you in such a hurry?
I blinked, but still responded, "I'll make arrangements."
I thought Xie Tingxu had settled down.
I thought he looked away and obediently gave birth to the royal family.
The result is that I thought too much.
I had just untied my corset and was about to go to sleep. I guessed that the Emperor should have already become pregnant by this time.
But there was a knock on my palace door.
"Eunuch Wu! The emperor is injured!"
Oh my god.
Is the law that the emperor must be injured triggered?
I didn't have time to tie up my chest, so I had to wear the largest official robe to cover it up. My hair was not tied up, but my long hair was let down. I carried my shoes while running.
What is this?
I led a group of royal guards into the concubine's palace and found that the concubine was forced to kneel on the ground by the royal guards. Xie Tingxu had his left eye closed, blood was flowing from the corners of his eyebrows, and there was a wound on the palm of his hand that was bleeding. A small bloody dagger dropped.
"Eunuch Wu!" When the imperial guards saw me coming, they saluted in unison.
"What kind of ceremony are you doing? Have you sent the imperial doctor?" I was so angry.
The Royal Forest Army was shocked by my roar, "The Imperial Physician is already on the way..."
I looked at the blood on the ground, my heart tightened, and I quickly shouted: "The Royal Forest Army ! Seal the Concubine Hall! I don’t want to hear the news about the Emperor’s injury tonight from anyone tomorrow! If there is any leakage, please bring it up!”
“No!” The Imperial Guards responded and spread out to seal off the Concubine Hall. .
The concubine was held up by the imperial guards. My shoes were not firmly on and I gave up even if they fell off. I quickly ran to Xie Tingxu, "Your Majesty?! Look up and let me see!"
Xie Tingxu looked up pitifully. Me, I was slightly startled by my appearance. I wanted to open my eyes but didn't dare.
The imperial doctor arrived late. He was as disheveled as me. As soon as he came over, he was frightened by the look in my eyes.
"It's coming so slowly, what's the use of you?!" I really wanted to kick him.
The imperial doctor came over while apologizing.
"Don't worry, Eunuch Wu, it's just a little skin injury with some trace amounts of toxins, but it's nothing serious. Just practice and detoxify regularly."
I felt relieved and turned back to look at the concubine.
"Is that you?" I asked coldly.
The concubine looked vicious and laughed, "I just wish I didn't kill him!"
"Pa—!!"
The concubine's palace was quiet.
My hands were still slightly painful. I slapped the concubine to the ground with my palm. I used 100% of my strength. I took a few deep breaths and said calmly: "All the members of the family must be buried alive together. ”
The woman’s eyes widened and she was dragged out screaming.
All the imperial guards swallowed their saliva. Eunuch Wusu was very talkative and approachable, but his methods were also surprisingly ruthless and he was known as a smiling tiger.
As we all know, Eunuch Wusu’s bottom line is the emperor.
For a moment, no one in the hall dared to speak.
I don’t dare to speak either.
I found this concubine, but I didn't notice her murderous intention.
It seems that Xie Tingxu received the sword with nothing and only suffered minor injuries. If it was really hurt, how should I explain it.
Xie Tingxu stood up and asked the imperial doctor to retreat. He walked behind me and gently tugged on my robe. I heard him call me in a low voice: "I'm fine, it's just a minor injury."
I turned around, my eyes red, "If something really happens to you, how can I explain to Guangyang City?"
Xie Tingxu was stunned, grabbed my hand, and pushed me in with a little force. In his arms.
"I knew Su Su felt sorry for me."
Nonsense.
If you die, I won’t have to be buried with you.
I am dumbfounded. After the emperor died, he was buried with his harem and his personal eunuchs and maids.
This damn law.
I still want to live to be twenty-five.
8.
The emperor's paw was injured and he became a giant baby.
"Susu, I want to eat grapes."
I stuffed two grapes into his mouth expressionlessly.
Hiss, is it a dog? Why are you biting my hand?
"Susu, I want to drink tea.”
I picked up the teacup without expression and handed it to his mouth.
"Susu, my belt is too tight, please help me loosen it."
I "..."
I will strip it for you directly. What do you think?
Xie Tingxu smiled innocently.
I hugged his waist resignedly and touched the buckle on the back, and finally touched a small bulging bag.
The smile in Xie Tingxu's eyes deepened, "What did you touch?"
I was stunned and took out the small bag in my belt.
are two peace charms, which should contain peach seeds. They are very small little tips, one blue and one red.
"Which one does Su Su like?" Xie Tingxu asked me softly.
I thought for a moment, "The red one."
Xie Tingxu nodded, "Can you please help me, Su Su, to put the other one into my lapel."
I did as he was told.
"The red one, Su Su, take it." Xie Tingxu laughed in a low voice, "It's safe."
I didn't refuse. This thing is just a belief, but I don't really believe it.
I put it in my sleeves, still remembering my original intention and wanting to help him loosen his belt.
This posture is like me leaning on his arms.
I leaned my head on his chest and could hear the heartbeat gradually accelerating.
The sound of sudden braking footsteps was heard not far away.
I heard Xie Tingxu's smiling voice: "Qingxian, Old Road, here we come..."
I was startled, and I stood up straight before the belt was buckled, and then Xie Tingxu felt a chill on his crotch, The pants collapsed without warning.
...
The emperor's beautiful legs are so beautiful, just pay five liang a piece.
"Pfft hahahaha——!" Xie Qingxian burst into laughter, and the eldest princess's grace was completely lost.
Lu Chengwen suppressed his laughter until his face turned red, and he did not dare to laugh out loud.
I stared at Xie Tingxu, who had a stiff face, and whispered, "How about... I can help you put it on?"
Xie Tingxu hesitated to scold, but finally he pulled up his pants in a very messy manner.
He said with a livid face, "Susu is so eager to take off my clothes?"
I struggled for a while, but still said: "Why are you so ordinary, yet so confident."
Xie Qingxian was stunned, and then Hahaha laughed.
is hard, the fist is hard.
"I am ordinary?!" Xie Tingxu was provoked as a man, "I am the emperor, you say I am ordinary?!"
I waved my hands repeatedly, "Not ordinary, not ordinary, you are the only one in heaven and on earth!"
Xie Tingxu snorted heavily.
Xie Qingxian had enough laughter, and he and Lu Chengwen walked towards us, "There is a Hanyu Festival outside the palace tonight. I heard it is very lively. We want to go and see it. Can the Emperor brother go?"
It's mine. Is it an illusion? I always felt that the eldest princess was secretly communicating with Xie Tingxu with their eyes.
Lu Chengwen also smiled cunningly: "Yes, yes, Lao Xie, you can bring Wu Su with you. It's the cold moon festival, it's so lively. The streets are full of people wearing masks and putting on lanterns to watch the flowers."
Xie Tingxu smiled and said, "Ah, okay, okay, I will definitely bring Wu Su with me."
I was arranged so inexplicably? ? ?
htmlJanuary Han Festival, as the name suggests, the moon is very big and round on this day. There was a legend that on the night of the Moon Festival, everyone would wear exquisite masks, and the fox fairy would hide in them to bless the people, which means Inari God's blessing for the coming year. Good weather.
is just a legend.
We were traveling as a group of four. We didn’t bring the Royal Guards, but only a dozen secret guards, because they all wore masks and we weren’t afraid of being recognized.
Xie Qingxian has never been idle along the way. He is holding either candied haws or grilled skewers. He looks like he has never seen the world, but the grilled skewers are really delicious.
There was a competition ring in front of it. Lu Chengwen was going to take Xie Tingxu to have a look. Xie Qingxian didn't like this, so he took me into a clothing store.
"Look, Su Su, these clothes are so beautiful!" . 》
It’s been a long, long, long time since I wore a girl’s outfit, and I haven’t had a red lip or rouge for a long, long time.
I deliberately darken my plain face to make myself look less pretty.
But today because I have to wear a mask, I don’t bother to discredit myself. I look much fairer and more dewy than usual.
"Do you want to try it?" Xie Qingxian picked up one of the white clothes and said to me, "I have never seen you wearing women's clothing."
I was a little embarrassed and looked outside awkwardly, "This ...Not so good..."
Xie Qingxian looked puzzled, "Brother Emperor... No, brother and Lu Chengwen went to see the ring. There are so many people. Whether we can meet again depends on fate. It's okay. Just give it a try. If it suits us, we will buy it." , you can wear it when we go out to play alone in the future!"
I still feel unreliable.
Xie Qingxian's eyes widened, "You don't need to pay! I'll pay!"
I immediately took the clothes in her hand and replied neatly: "Thank you, princess."
turned around and walked into the changing cubicle. .
I can still hear Xie Qingxian’s cursing voice.
I haven't worn it for a long time, and I lingered for a long time. With my hair down and a silver fox mask on my face, I pushed open the compartment door.
I saw Xie Qingxian’s stunned face.
"Oh my god Susu..." Xie Qingxian rushed up and held my hand, touching her while saying, "Your waist, your neck, your breasts..."
I covered her Mouth, one hand caught her restless Hand, smiled and whispered: "Princess, shut up, stop."
Xie Qingxian knocked off my hand, smiling so obscenely, "Okay, Su Su, I usually don't notice that you have such a good figure when I see you in official uniform!" "
I sighed.
I feel bad.
I am sad.
"Come here." Xie Qingxian took off the mask on my face and took me to look at the rouge. "This color is beautiful."
said and applied it on my lips.
"You are quite fair, and you will look very pretty with just a little lip." Xie Qingxian said and helped me smooth my hair, "Not bad, you look like a frail and beautiful woman. You are so beautiful, and Jiang The daughter-in-law of the family has a lot to offer... No, you look more expensive. It’s a pity that I have to wear official uniforms and hats every day."
I smiled, "Expensive?" Is that my adjective?
Xie Qingxian finished dressing me, and he stuffed the mask into me with satisfaction, and threw a gold leaf to the shopkeeper, "Let's go shopping!"
I was stunned, I'm just going shopping like this? ? ?
"I'll go change it back first..." I held on to the door of Xiuyi Square and refused to go out.
Xie Qingxian used all her strength to pull me, "What are you going to change for! This outfit looks great! Your black official uniform has made me burnt! What are you changing for! Are you running naked?!"
shocked my mother ten years.
"Burn?!" I screamed strangely, looked at the plain white brocade robe on my body, and said solemnly: "Princess, I suddenly remembered that the clothes I washed have not been dried yet. I have to go back to the palace first..."
"I've asked someone to hang your clothes for you, let's go!" Xie Qingxian pulled my whole body out with a strong force.
finished the ball.
I looked at the crowded streets and swallowed.
shouldn’t be so memorized, was it seen by Xie Tingxu?
Now that you see me dressed up like this, why don’t you punish me for deceiving the king?
My hand holding the silver fox mask trembled slightly.
Xie Qingxian pulled me hard towards the ring.
I feel something is wrong.
Did Xie Qingxian deliberately ask me to change into women’s clothes and deliberately drag me to see Xie Tingxu!?
I, I, spun around to break away from Xie Qingxian's hand, and then said with a fake smile: "Princess! There are people putting lanterns over there! I'm going to kill a lantern for fun! You go find them first! Hehehehehe... "
I turned around and ran away with a fake smile, completely ignoring Xie Qingxian's shouts.
If it doesn’t run now, how long will it take? !
When did Xie Qingxian and Xie Tingxu join forces? If you want me to die, just say so!
I pushed through the crowd and ran toward the river.
There are many people by the river, and the river is covered with pink lanterns, which is really beautiful.
I was panting, still worrying about how I should go back to the palace.
A little girl tugged at the hem of my skirt. I lowered my head and saw that it was a little girl, so I squatted down and asked softly, "What are you doing?"
The little girl said in a sweet voice: " Sister, you are so beautiful."
I was amused and pinched her little face. "You are also very beautiful. You will be a great beauty in the future."
The little girl turned around and ran away.
This article comes from Zhihu "The Thin Little Father-in-law"
Completed | Eat with confidence
