"This article is original by Yuyu Island, and personal forwarding and sharing are welcome"
Mothers always make sense for their concerns. Children are young and must always worry about them.
Worry about whether they are well-fed and well-dressed in school or not. Among all the worries, the most worrying thing about mothers is the security issue .
Although mothers spend most of their time with their children, always has negligence, and sometimes accidents are difficult to avoid . You can't keep your child around you because you're worried, as the child is too unfree.
The situations children face every day are ever-changing, and the mother feels that she must be a superman to protect the child.
Walking in the park, but I don’t want my daughter to encounter an “accident”
Last week, Xiao Yue took her 6-year-old daughter to the park to play. She originally wanted to take a walk and bask in the sun in the park. But the child couldn't stay idle and saw that the other children were playing, so he didn't want to stay with Xiaoyue.
There are many amusement facilities in the park, but most children cannot play with it. Only carousels, trampolines, bumper cars, etc. can be tried.
Xiaoyue took her daughter to play with bumper cars. At first she was a little scared and asked Xiaoyue to accompany her. Later, she saw that other children could drive well, so she wanted to try it.
After losing Xiaoyue's protection, my daughter drove very steadily, turning and reversing smoothly. Seeing this, Xiaoyue also happily shouted "Daughter is great."
I didn’t want to finish the speech, ’s daughter encountered an accident . The car suddenly lost control and accelerated, hit the guardrail next to it and bounced back, hitting other cars.
My daughter was so scared that she didn't expect to control the car. Xiaoyue and the staff rushed up and grabbed the car immediately. My daughter was just shocked at first. After seeing Xiaoyue, she immediately hugged her and cried .
After crying for a long time, there were finally some signs of easing. Xiao Yue wanted to comfort her with ice cream, but she didn't expect that the child was in the mood to eat it.
Xiaoyue had to take her daughter home. When she went to bed at night, she seemed to have not yet come back to her senses from the fear during the day. Her daughter kept holding Xiaoyue before going to bed and refused to let go, and she frowned after falling asleep.
After fear, it may still be "fearing a well rope for ten years"
This fear is far from over, and there are often more sequelae . In the future, as long as you mention taking a car, your daughter will cry and refuse to get on the car. Even if she is forced to take a father's car, she will be so nervous that she doesn't move.
For a while, my daughter was reluctant to even take the kindergarten bus, so Xiaoyue could only ride a bicycle to take her to school.
Xiao Yue felt a little worried. Can't my daughter's fear of the car be relieved? After all, it is impossible not to take a car for the rest of your life, but now my daughter will take a detour when she sees the toys in the car. How can she change this situation?
In fact, many children have encountered situations like Xiao Yue’s daughter. When children encounter an accident, they will be frightened at the moment. They will not adjust themselves like adults. They may be "afraid of a rope when they are bitten by a snake for ten years."
After a child is accidentally frightened, is prone to trouble with nightmares and tension . If he is very serious, he should consider the possibility of " Post-traumatic stress disorder " , which is generally prone to young children.
The moment when the child was so scared that he cried, smart parents would do this
Since the child cannot solve the problem independently, parents should find ways to help them. When a child encounters an accident, his first reaction is fear.
When something happened, if parents can reverse their children's fear in time and comfort them, their children will be very little affected by accident .
For example, when the daughter was frightened after encountering a car crash, Xiaoyue should not let the child immersed in grief and give the child time to think, "The bumper car is too terrible, I will never play again", but to stop the loss in time.
What you should do is to relieve your child’s emotions first, such as taking the child to watch interesting activities, and there are adults bungee jumping in the park to let the child watch and feel the stimulation of this adventure.
Ice cream, gentle comfort, cannot attract children's attention, so you can only try to replace fear with stronger emotions. The most important thing is that if the child hides in fear and refuses to come out, the parents will pull her out even if they spend a lot of effort.
Like Xiaoyue, letting children do whatever they want, of course they will only feel scared, after all, human nature is easy to sink. Whether it is lazy or afraid, it is easy to get deeper and deeper into .
A person’s beautiful nature is brave, which represents the spirit of breakthrough. Don’t be afraid when facing fear, but use courage to overcome it. The most important task for parents is to help their children become brave people.
If the child has "post-traumatic stress disorder", there are two major methods
. Perform psychological hints
Psychologists once did such a study: they asked a group of children to try to walk on the iron chain bridge. This is a challenging thing for children.
To prove the effect of psychological suggestion, before setting off, psychologists said to half of the children: "You are the best, believe that you can go through," while the other half of the children were not encouraged.
When the children officially walked on the iron chain bridge, most of the children who were encouraged passed through the iron chain bridge, while most of the children who were not encouraged did not pass. shows that positive hints have a great impact on people .
- defense your child's fear first
When the child has been dominated by fear, parents can try to divert their fear and change their children's thoughts.
For example, a parent posted online that his child must take a sports test and skipping rope exam, but his child has tripped because of skipping rope. Later, whenever I saw the rope, I felt scared and felt that I must not do it. But sports tests cannot be escaped, so what should I do?
- Encourage
At this time, parents can help you next to you and encourage your child to jump rope more, so that the child can believe that this is no big deal.
As long as the child tries to jump, the mother can say, "It's great. She is obviously good at jumping rope. Why don't you jump normally?" It doesn't matter if her tone is exaggerated, the most important thing is to make the child happy.
If you happen to make a mistake, don’t let the child fall into anxiety . You can joke: “Did you perform on purpose for me to see?” and other things will change the focus. The child will think according to the mother’s words and will not be entangled in the wrestling matter.
For this parent, what needs to be done to help their children overcome the fear of jumping rope is to encourage their children to jump rope more. creates a relaxed atmosphere and not care about the results, so that the children can re-accept .
2. Help your child experience
Many children will show emotional instability such as anxiety and tension after experiencing accidents. Some of the children are affected by this negative emotion for a long time and will affect their normal lives.
Most children will not be so serious after encountering an accident. But if you really encounter "post-traumatic stress disorder", parents want their children to stop being afraid and can let them experience an accident again.
For adults with self-control, they usually get up wherever they fall, but children are different. When they encounter accidents, they feel frightened several times that of adults.
Therefore, children resist everything when an accident occurs, seemingly resisting fear, but in fact, the fear in their hearts is spreading wantonly.
To drive away fear, you must first face fear. The more you are afraid of, the more you need to break through psychological barriers and overcome it.
When a child practices riding a bicycle and steps uphill, he falls heavily because he doesn't have enough strength, and he keeps talking about riding a bicycle.
To make the child not afraid of riding a bicycle, parents can take them to the uphill again. Parents can hold on first. After the child feels no longer afraid, let the child ride it by himself.
Many accidental trauma can actually be compensated. The most important thing is that parents should find the right method and don’t let their children fall into fear.If you are always helpless, it will only be even more difficult for a child to be free from fear when he grows up.
More importantly, early prevention, try to avoid scaring children
It is important to learn to overcome fear, and it is also important to strengthen the awareness of safety education. If you just wait for an accident to happen every time and spend a lot of time and energy to face it, the cost of such growth is too high.
Parents should try their best to make their children fully mentally prepared and able to deal with accidents when things happen. If they really feel that they can’t cope, they will make up for it later.
Parents can also reduce stress for themselves by cultivating their children's safety awareness. There are no children in this world who don’t need to worry about, but there are smart children and brave children. When they feel fear, please give them more care.
Reference:
1.https://baike.baidu.com/item/%E5%88%9B%E4%BC%A4%E5%90%8E%E5%BA%94%E6%BF%80%E9%9A%9C%E7%A2%8D/5445960?fr=aladdin
2.https://baike.pcbaby.com.cn/long/75089.html
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