text | Chen Sansui
I remember when " Life Events " was released in theaters, many people said: Finally, there is a domestic funeral movie.
Marriage and funerals are all major events in life, but "mourning" is the most difficult thing to talk about.
This " Sanyue has a new job " is really a professional drama that has been delayed by the title.
During the process of watching the drama, everyone dares to use barrage to talk about death and rebirth together.
What is rebirth?
In this drama, everyone calls the dead "rebirths". In fact, this is the concept of Buddhism . Buddhism believes that some people with spiritual roots die and go to Pure Land to practice. Their death is not an end, but a new beginning.
Later, this definition spread and more and more people hope that the death of their family and friends is also a kind of "rebirth" rather than an end, so they later used it as a general reference to the dead.
In the era of introvert, the "depressed" heroine is very real
The first feeling of watching this drama is that the heroine is really depressed.
Although her setting is a post-95s generation, she cannot see youth and vitality in her at all, only sadness.
Her "depression" is obviously not in line with mainstream values. Countless people encourage young people to be motivated, proactive and hardworking. The whole world tells you that you must strive, buy a house, and buy a car.
The heroine Sanyue’s “sang” is very real. I remember her classic lines very clearly: Why can’t people who like to work work? Let people who like to lie flat lying down, try to roll and feel the Buddha’s heart. Although
does not bring much value to society, we have not caused harm to others. Isn’t it good to be ourselves? No?
There is another boy in the play that is completely opposite to Sanyue. He is an excellent child who lives in the expectations of his parents all his life.
html When I was 16 years old, I had to observe my words and expressions when I bought birthday gifts. I clearly liked the game console in my heart. Seeing my parents' disappointed eyes, I finally chose "Three Hundred Tang Poems".
When he grew up, he indeed became the pride of his parents, and he was able to be freed from this so-called "perfect character".
The parents opened his small circle of friends. It turned out that this excellent boy never lived for himself. His life was to "please please his parents" and "please please the world", but he did not "please please himself".
His ending was full of regrets, and his parents were also full of regrets. It seemed like a beautiful beginning, but they had an "all-out loss".
In this era of inclination , more young people oppose society to get rid of blood.
This is because contemporary young people know better that a good life should not be defined by the outside world. Everyone's pursuit of life is different. Therefore, in order to "leave without regrets", we must be more firm in our "original heart", and if you want to Buddha, if you want to scroll, everything will follow your heart.
Is rescue an obsession with the living or the wish of the dead?
In the play, there are two siblings who are the old lady's family. The old lady naturally goes to the end of her life. The family also chose hospice care rather than rescue under the persuasion of the doctor.
However, when I saw my mother's cardiac arrest, the two children changed their minds and chose to "rescue the old man". Later, the old man had angerectomy and continued to breathe with pain.
I still remember when my daughter changed her mind, she shouted "Brother, we can't be without mother!"
, this sentence confirmed the attributes of this rescue. The children could not accept the separation, and chose to rescue again. Even if the old man told them "let me go" with his mouth, the two of them still stubbornly chose to continue the rescue.
Standing at the commanding heights of life, no one does not want to live, but what we need is to live with quality, rather than being a walking corpse and fulfilling the filial piety of our children, because this is not "filial piety", this is "obsession".
On the contrary, in the play, the deputy director of the funeral home suddenly learned about his late stage of pancreatic cancer in an incident of vomiting blood. He discussed with his wife and resolutely chose peaceful treatment. The entire treatment process was aimed at "reducing pain". He happily spent only few days left, fulfilled every wish that could be fulfilled, and also made his death into a documentary and placed it on the public platform. At the end, at the moment when his heart stopped, his wife did not choose to rescue him, but lay quietly on his chest, feeling his remaining warmth. This was relief and fulfillment.
So whether it is a relative or a friend, when we rescue a person who is bound to die, we need to ask ourselves, is this rescue we need? Or does he/she need it? If it is just to satisfy the guilt of our living people, then such rescue is selfish, ineffective, and excessive. We should learn to distinguish ourselves, rather than use the pain of our family to help us learn to distinguish.
Life will disappear, but love will not
Although Sanyue in the play is a post-95s generation, the depth of her thinking about the problem is admirable. She has been thinking about the meaning of life for a long time?
came to the world alive, just like walking around the park, wandering around, working hard for half a lifetime, but ending up not being able to take anything away, and then I died. So what is the meaning of walking like this?
The meaning of this is to experience "love". The process of burial in the play is to make us realize that life has an end. This one-way road has no need to look back, but can only move forward. From the moment of life, it is determined that every day in the future, we will only get closer and closer to "death". Because of one-way driving, there is no road to regret, and the scenery along the way is with us.
Since 's life cycle is limited, what we want to pursue is experience. For example, when Sanyue in the play confesses her love when she is about to confess, she will never waste her life and spend it on useless entanglements.
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I believe that anyone who has watched " is good " knows that the heroine in the play suffered from family trauma of favoring boys over girls, so she grew up quite difficult.
The final outcome is that the son enjoys all the benefits, but lets the daughter bear the father's pension, which is obviously unreasonable.
In "Sanyue has a new job", there is also a couple who prefer boys over girls. They abandoned their twin sisters to give birth to their son. In the end, the younger sister died of a sudden heart attack, and the son later died of a terminal illness.
The only remaining eldest daughter in the family said to her parents: "My beloved youngest son has passed away. It's even more sad than death. I have to bear the sadness. I spend the rest of your life thinking about what I have done, guarding my son's ashes, and blessing you for a long time. If you die, I will scatter my brother's ashes and yours, just like you abandoned my sister back then, and there is no scum left. I will do what I say. "
Compared to the courage of this daughter, in fact, many people in reality feel inferior. More girls have become " Fan Shengmei ", and although they are unwilling to give up, they still become tools to support their younger brother.
In a family that prefers boys over girls, if parents make unforgivable moral and legal mistakes, then I think "severance" is necessary. Life is short and good relationships deserve careful care. Those bad relationships that affect their lives need to be cleaned up in time, otherwise there will be endless troubles.
The core of the parent-child relationship is love. If there is no love, then it would be meaningless to raise me. Because the unhappiness of childhood has broken me, I am no longer complete, so how can I talk about loving others?
Family affection is two-way. There is no love for no reason in this world. Unless you have loved her, how can children love you?
"Sanyue has a new job" dares to talk about death, and the entire theme is sublimated. Living towards death is the way everyone is destined to be.
Leave more love and muster up more courage to face death or separation, which is the subject of our life.
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