Recently, several breathtaking screenshots have been circulated on various social media again.
A child stood on the rooftop and accused his father.
The 56 novels I once wrote were torn off by my father page by page.
The reason is that it affects learning.
Source | A green cub
The experience of a little girl suddenly triggered everyone's childhood PTSD. The program
comes from " Boy Talks " which was launched in 2018. Haven't you seen
? Not surprising.
Because its Douban score is only 5.2, it has received a lot of bad reviews as soon as it started broadcasting, and even suspected of plagiarism.
Strangely.
Four years have passed, and not only does it not cool down, but its popularity is getting higher and higher.
Every once in a while, screenshots of children's shouting on the rooftop are like golden sentences in film and television dramas, and can become a hit public opinion on all platforms.
Education and parenting articles must also be accompanied by a screenshot from "The Young People".
That's because the most real Chinese-style parent-child relationship and the most real teenager group are not in those dramas, but in this variety show with such a split reputation in
.
"Youth Talk" has a bad reputation.
may be 4 years ago, and its planning starting point is undoubtedly good.
This generation of teenagers is extremely eager to express and communicate directly, but their parents are people who are not good at face-to-face communication and express emotions directly.
So, the program team asked the children to stand on the school rooftop, shouting to their classmates and friends, and their parents, so as to speak the truth that they usually are difficult to speak or have no chance to say.
But this variety show has been aired from 2018 to 2020 for 4 seasons. Has the distance between the two generations really been closer?
Not to mention in life, I didn’t even get closer in the show.
Children choose to make public in front of the whole class and the whole country with the original intention of breaking the barriers between their parents and effectively communicating.
The relationship between each child and his parents is particularly typical.
and even the "rooftop shouting" directly turned into a "Chinese-style parent accusation conference".
But how do parents below face their children’s sincere voice?
— continues to suppress .
The article begins with the little girl who likes to write novels since she was a child and has good grades in liberal arts.
The little girl described her feeling after more than 50 novels were torn:
During that time, I felt like I had lost my soul.
But how did the father in the audience respond after hearing the child analyze his injured heart like this?
Continue to insert the knife:
"Put your novel first, and let's discuss it later."
The girl said that she is very good at liberal arts, and she doesn't want to learn mathematics, and she has worked very hard, but compared to those classmates in the class with very good math grades, she can't catch up in her whole life.
She had already taken out her heart in front of the whole class, but her father only responded to one chicken soup:
"Others can do it, you can do it too."
The girl bravely walked onto the rooftop, not to get any encouragement in learning, but to hope that her father can respect herself and not treat herself in such a rough way.
But my father didn't understand what she meant at all.
No wonder the girl collapsed and cried after hearing her father's words. Seeing her face walking down the rooftop, I was heartbroken.
There are many other injured little girls like this.
A girl's mother often compares her with "other people's children" to criticize her and suppress her.
She said the voice we had not had time to express and even wanted to say now:
"The child is not the only one who is the best of others. Your own child is also working very hard, why don't you look at it?"
The mother's reaction completely confirmed what the child said.
"What I said is actually very objective."
"If you don't hit, you may be a little floating."
Think from the perspective of others? No.
Understand children? Neither.
This mother still lives in her own world and “can’t see” her own children.
In this program, you can observe the most peculiar phenomenon of Chinese parents:
When parents finally hear their children's voice, their first reaction is often to "look for the steps to " instead of understanding why the children say this.
There is no doubt that these parents love their children, and their starting point is to "be good for their children."
But they don’t understand, or they don’t want to understand the child.
A boy tells the story of his mother monitoring her life 360 degrees without blind spots.
He said in the gentlest tone, "I can't stand it", but his expression was still smiling, giving his mother enough face.
And the mother's first reaction was to start "turning up old accounts" and train the child:
I came with you this morning with anger. You don't understand what you did wrong. Why do I remind you like this every day? In the program
, although the physical heights of parents and children are interchangeable.
Children are in the "high position" and parents are in the "low position".
But once the communication starts, the boy standing on the rooftop shouting is just a change of position and listening to his mother's lesson.
No matter how high a standing, the child is always the one who is criticized and taught a lesson.
Moreover, such calls are ineffective.
The parents were unmoved, and the program team was almost always "mixed".
It was still the scene of the little boy calling out. Host Chen Ming After seeing the child being trained, he walked to the middle to communicate with the mother and son for a little while. The two seemed to have taken a step back and reconciled.
But you see, when the child goes down from the rooftop, something wonderful happens.
Mother greets the students around her child, asking them to supervise their studies more, and even suggests that everyone can create a group, so she can know what the child is doing in normal times. The classmates around
are all smiling helplessly.
Suffocation.
Seeing this, I understand why this program has been making a lot of appearances in the past 4 years.
Credit goes to these real children. In the
program, every child’s expression is very sincere. They really regard it as a good opportunity to communicate with their parents, so they will choose to bravely walk on the rooftop.
heart-to-heart, pour out all your grievances.
Their doubts, grievances and confusions are what most adolescent children will encounter under Chinese parent-child education.
"Rooftop Call" did not solve the gap between the two generations, but also exposed the inability to bridge this barrier.
In life, is there less ineffective communication between parents and children?
years ago, this variety show was given such a low score, and another reason was that there was controversy over plagiarism.
It has great similarities with the Japanese variety show "Campus Crazy God List" aired between 1996 and 2008. In form, students stand on the rooftop and shout out their own voices.
One of the more controversial points back then was that the contents of the two programs were really too different.
piao for the time being, and does not identify whether this program has the copyright or whether it is plagiarized. Instead, from the content of the program, what is the difference between "Youth Talk" and "Campus Crazy God List". The most prominent point in
is that "Campus Crazy God List" is completely a program for primary and secondary school students, a program for adolescent boys and girls, full of ignorance, youth and joy.
But the issue of "Youth Says" is much heavier than .
Before the children could feel the flying youth, they were about to be overwhelmed by pressure.
They express not only the troubles of youth, but also the structural problems rooted in society transmitted through adults.
prefer boys over girls issues.
Looking at "The Young Man", I have seen no less than 3 little girls who accuse my father of being partial.
"He is younger than you, you should give in to him!"
"I am also a child, and I should need care too."
"I am only 3 years older than my brother, and I am also a baby, why don't I give me chicken legs?"
The issue of left-behind children.
"In my impression, my parents never celebrated my birthday with me."
Later, because the problems were too heavy, in order to balance, some "Thank you" stories were added later.
The children’s stories and feelings are of course sincere.
But the original intention of the program gradually became the most annoying keynote speech contest we were when we were young. Speech competitions like
are often "he must want to teach me something" rather than "I express what I really want to say."
And "Campus Crazy God List" does not have so many heavy topics or correct principles, but more of what adolescent children really care about.
Youth little worries, there are.
A girl "accused" her little boyfriend: I have a good relationship with other girls recently, and I am a little discouraged.
Do you like me or not?
When the little boy said, "I like you the most!"
The girl's joy could not be suppressed.
There is also a little boy confessing his love to a girl in the same class on the rooftop.
He seemed to use all his strength and the most rigorous words in the adult world to express his love openly:
"I like you~"
There are also shy menstrual problems.
Someone is happy and tells the world that the hair in one part of me has finally grown!
Someone is worried - why is it still naked there?
Don’t think that it is because the principal, teacher and parents are not here that they let themselves go.
rooftop confession conference was hosted by the principal, and even took the lead in making a fuss:
"From now on, love is love. If you only know that you will be hurt, Damedama!"
These images are also precious enough for the children inside.
No matter how shameful it will be to look back when you grow up, you will definitely be glad that I have had such a happy and ignorant moment.
On Douban's "Youth Talk" program page, the most liked comment said:
"Original: Healing; Replica: Depression."
Comparing two programs, the children in "Campus Crazy God List" may not be without academic pressure, but it is indeed more like a variety show, full of joy.
, and "Youth Talk" makes people feel that this is really too real and too heavy. The child in
is so sensible.
Rather than saying that they are "accusing", they are still giving their parents a guilty mood.
Moreover, every opinion is extremely tactful.
When the elders replied, they also listened carefully and reflected on themselves.
When my mother scolded herself and cried, she also wiped away the tears from the corners of her mother's eyes sensibly.
. An indisputable fact is that although it is not happy at all, it is so heavy, and even though Chinese children look so sensible, they are even a little ripened.
But it is real.
We grew up like this.
Before, we said that the previous generation of parents lived in an era of material scarcity, had no chance to receive a good education, and did not know how to express themselves, so they often brutally interfered in their children's lives.
Almost every post-80s and 90s has experienced or heard of being punished by parents to not be able to eat, tear up diary, and report early love to school.
997 movie " Love Malatang ", there is such a plot.
The male protagonist played by Zhao Miao is a middle school student who likes to record various sounds. He fell in love with the female protagonist played by Gao Yuanyuan and recorded a confession tape for her.
But Gao Yuanyuan's mother eavesdropped on the tape and reported it to the head teacher;
And Zhao Miao's father simply threw all the tapes of sound effects he had worked hard to record into the trash can.
After 20 years, you think Chinese parents will be different. After the generation who was suppressed by their parents became parents, they should respect their children as individuals more.
However, "Youth Says" tells us:
does not.
The boy said, it became useless to say it.
No matter how the children on the rooftop cry, parents always show their children's reasons for doing this with themselves.
This only reminds people of two words: daddy flavor, arrogant .
In Chinese-style family relationships, parents often need to consolidate their status by establishing the authority of their parents and treat their children and families as a career.
In this process, the sense of boundary between parents and children becomes blurred, and parents' desire to control their children becomes stronger, and they will somewhat close their empathy ability .
They don’t know how to listen to their children’s voices, nor do they think from the perspective of others. Their way of doing things is “I don’t want you to think, I want me to think.”
I wonder what the father who burned his daughter's novels and never praised his daughter's mother. Have you ever thought about it:
If all important work files are deleted and never received recognition from his boss at work, what will happen?
Sociologist Alan Johnson once said:
When playing the Monopoly game, we will inevitably become greedy evil people.
When you are exploited in the game, it is useless to accuse a certain player of greed, because without this player, the greed of other players will be stimulated.
What we should ask is: What kind of game rules does
make players so greedy?
Huang Zhizhong mentioned a phenomenon in " Strange Talk ": the most twisted point of the Chinese family relationship is called refusing to communicate in person, silently dedicating behind the scenes, and then treating the situation where one party is hidden in the dark as touching. The consequence of refusing to communicate is that Chinese parents are waiting for their children to be grateful for their children;
. Chinese children are waiting for their parents to apologize for the rest of their lives. The consequences of parents' refusal to communicate with each other are vividly reflected in "The Young People's Talk".
No parents want to be a bad parent hated by their children, but after establishing a family relationship, they become like this without realizing it.
Is this a problem with people, or is there a problem with family mechanism and social atmosphere?
"Youth Talk" is popular from time to time, as if reminding us:
years later, has our teenagers have better channels to express themselves?
still does not.
Most of the programs about teenagers are knowledge education, and they are full of talented genius boys and girls.
The year when "Youth Talks" was suspended, in 2020, Zhong Meimei was born, imitating the teacher vividly.
Is chocolate delicious? What do you want to ask, is chocolate delicious? Go and buy 54, and buy one for every teacher.
But the video was quickly deleted and disappeared.
Two years later, in 2022, children no longer have to speak, they can grasp all their information by using high technology:
A student's post became popular online because of complaining about doing homework.
The reason is a magical pen. When students use this pen to write on special paper, the handwriting will be recorded in the system background in real time.
Even during the summer vacation, even if the students are not in the classroom, the teacher can remotely monitor students' homework.
When will you start doing your homework and how much time you spend to do your homework, the teacher knows clearly.
So many years have passed, and the space for children to express themselves freely has not been expanded, but has been squeezed smaller and smaller, and even their lives are being supervised at all times.
No matter from the program, video or life, you will never see the true inner expressions of the teenagers in "Boys Talk".
saw only one kid in the mold of "good students" and "good kids".
The more closed their hearts, the blurry their image becomes. Gradually, they stop talking; no one really cares about what they are thinking.
Based on this, it is not difficult to understand that "Youth Talk" is becoming popular from time to time.
Although it is not good enough, there is no other program similar to it or even better than it.
The saddest thing is not why "Youth Says" is not good enough.
instead.
After 4 years, when we look back, we find that the platform that can accommodate "children's cry and voice" is actually only a 5.4-point variety show left.
She said the voice we had not had time to express and even wanted to say now:
"The child is not the only one who is the best of others. Your own child is also working very hard, why don't you look at it?"
The mother's reaction completely confirmed what the child said.
"What I said is actually very objective."
"If you don't hit, you may be a little floating."
Think from the perspective of others? No.
Understand children? Neither.
This mother still lives in her own world and “can’t see” her own children.
In this program, you can observe the most peculiar phenomenon of Chinese parents:
When parents finally hear their children's voice, their first reaction is often to "look for the steps to " instead of understanding why the children say this.
There is no doubt that these parents love their children, and their starting point is to "be good for their children."
But they don’t understand, or they don’t want to understand the child.
A boy tells the story of his mother monitoring her life 360 degrees without blind spots.
He said in the gentlest tone, "I can't stand it", but his expression was still smiling, giving his mother enough face.
And the mother's first reaction was to start "turning up old accounts" and train the child:
I came with you this morning with anger. You don't understand what you did wrong. Why do I remind you like this every day? In the program
, although the physical heights of parents and children are interchangeable.
Children are in the "high position" and parents are in the "low position".
But once the communication starts, the boy standing on the rooftop shouting is just a change of position and listening to his mother's lesson.
No matter how high a standing, the child is always the one who is criticized and taught a lesson.
Moreover, such calls are ineffective.
The parents were unmoved, and the program team was almost always "mixed".
It was still the scene of the little boy calling out. Host Chen Ming After seeing the child being trained, he walked to the middle to communicate with the mother and son for a little while. The two seemed to have taken a step back and reconciled.
But you see, when the child goes down from the rooftop, something wonderful happens.
Mother greets the students around her child, asking them to supervise their studies more, and even suggests that everyone can create a group, so she can know what the child is doing in normal times. The classmates around
are all smiling helplessly.
Suffocation.
Seeing this, I understand why this program has been making a lot of appearances in the past 4 years.
Credit goes to these real children. In the
program, every child’s expression is very sincere. They really regard it as a good opportunity to communicate with their parents, so they will choose to bravely walk on the rooftop.
heart-to-heart, pour out all your grievances.
Their doubts, grievances and confusions are what most adolescent children will encounter under Chinese parent-child education.
"Rooftop Call" did not solve the gap between the two generations, but also exposed the inability to bridge this barrier.
In life, is there less ineffective communication between parents and children?
years ago, this variety show was given such a low score, and another reason was that there was controversy over plagiarism.
It has great similarities with the Japanese variety show "Campus Crazy God List" aired between 1996 and 2008. In form, students stand on the rooftop and shout out their own voices.
One of the more controversial points back then was that the contents of the two programs were really too different.
piao for the time being, and does not identify whether this program has the copyright or whether it is plagiarized. Instead, from the content of the program, what is the difference between "Youth Talk" and "Campus Crazy God List". The most prominent point in
is that "Campus Crazy God List" is completely a program for primary and secondary school students, a program for adolescent boys and girls, full of ignorance, youth and joy.
But the issue of "Youth Says" is much heavier than .
Before the children could feel the flying youth, they were about to be overwhelmed by pressure.
They express not only the troubles of youth, but also the structural problems rooted in society transmitted through adults.
prefer boys over girls issues.
Looking at "The Young Man", I have seen no less than 3 little girls who accuse my father of being partial.
"He is younger than you, you should give in to him!"
"I am also a child, and I should need care too."
"I am only 3 years older than my brother, and I am also a baby, why don't I give me chicken legs?"
The issue of left-behind children.
"In my impression, my parents never celebrated my birthday with me."
Later, because the problems were too heavy, in order to balance, some "Thank you" stories were added later.
The children’s stories and feelings are of course sincere.
But the original intention of the program gradually became the most annoying keynote speech contest we were when we were young. Speech competitions like
are often "he must want to teach me something" rather than "I express what I really want to say."
And "Campus Crazy God List" does not have so many heavy topics or correct principles, but more of what adolescent children really care about.
Youth little worries, there are.
A girl "accused" her little boyfriend: I have a good relationship with other girls recently, and I am a little discouraged.
Do you like me or not?
When the little boy said, "I like you the most!"
The girl's joy could not be suppressed.
There is also a little boy confessing his love to a girl in the same class on the rooftop.
He seemed to use all his strength and the most rigorous words in the adult world to express his love openly:
"I like you~"
There are also shy menstrual problems.
Someone is happy and tells the world that the hair in one part of me has finally grown!
Someone is worried - why is it still naked there?
Don’t think that it is because the principal, teacher and parents are not here that they let themselves go.
rooftop confession conference was hosted by the principal, and even took the lead in making a fuss:
"From now on, love is love. If you only know that you will be hurt, Damedama!"
These images are also precious enough for the children inside.
No matter how shameful it will be to look back when you grow up, you will definitely be glad that I have had such a happy and ignorant moment.
On Douban's "Youth Talk" program page, the most liked comment said:
"Original: Healing; Replica: Depression."
Comparing two programs, the children in "Campus Crazy God List" may not be without academic pressure, but it is indeed more like a variety show, full of joy.
, and "Youth Talk" makes people feel that this is really too real and too heavy. The child in
is so sensible.
Rather than saying that they are "accusing", they are still giving their parents a guilty mood.
Moreover, every opinion is extremely tactful.
When the elders replied, they also listened carefully and reflected on themselves.
When my mother scolded herself and cried, she also wiped away the tears from the corners of her mother's eyes sensibly.
. An indisputable fact is that although it is not happy at all, it is so heavy, and even though Chinese children look so sensible, they are even a little ripened.
But it is real.
We grew up like this.
Before, we said that the previous generation of parents lived in an era of material scarcity, had no chance to receive a good education, and did not know how to express themselves, so they often brutally interfered in their children's lives.
Almost every post-80s and 90s has experienced or heard of being punished by parents to not be able to eat, tear up diary, and report early love to school.
997 movie " Love Malatang ", there is such a plot.
The male protagonist played by Zhao Miao is a middle school student who likes to record various sounds. He fell in love with the female protagonist played by Gao Yuanyuan and recorded a confession tape for her.
But Gao Yuanyuan's mother eavesdropped on the tape and reported it to the head teacher;
And Zhao Miao's father simply threw all the tapes of sound effects he had worked hard to record into the trash can.
After 20 years, you think Chinese parents will be different. After the generation who was suppressed by their parents became parents, they should respect their children as individuals more.
However, "Youth Says" tells us:
does not.
The boy said, it became useless to say it.
No matter how the children on the rooftop cry, parents always show their children's reasons for doing this with themselves.
This only reminds people of two words: daddy flavor, arrogant .
In Chinese-style family relationships, parents often need to consolidate their status by establishing the authority of their parents and treat their children and families as a career.
In this process, the sense of boundary between parents and children becomes blurred, and parents' desire to control their children becomes stronger, and they will somewhat close their empathy ability .
They don’t know how to listen to their children’s voices, nor do they think from the perspective of others. Their way of doing things is “I don’t want you to think, I want me to think.”
I wonder what the father who burned his daughter's novels and never praised his daughter's mother. Have you ever thought about it:
If all important work files are deleted and never received recognition from his boss at work, what will happen?
Sociologist Alan Johnson once said:
When playing the Monopoly game, we will inevitably become greedy evil people.
When you are exploited in the game, it is useless to accuse a certain player of greed, because without this player, the greed of other players will be stimulated.
What we should ask is: What kind of game rules does
make players so greedy?
Huang Zhizhong mentioned a phenomenon in " Strange Talk ": the most twisted point of the Chinese family relationship is called refusing to communicate in person, silently dedicating behind the scenes, and then treating the situation where one party is hidden in the dark as touching. The consequence of refusing to communicate is that Chinese parents are waiting for their children to be grateful for their children;
. Chinese children are waiting for their parents to apologize for the rest of their lives. The consequences of parents' refusal to communicate with each other are vividly reflected in "The Young People's Talk".
No parents want to be a bad parent hated by their children, but after establishing a family relationship, they become like this without realizing it.
Is this a problem with people, or is there a problem with family mechanism and social atmosphere?
"Youth Talk" is popular from time to time, as if reminding us:
years later, has our teenagers have better channels to express themselves?
still does not.
Most of the programs about teenagers are knowledge education, and they are full of talented genius boys and girls.
The year when "Youth Talks" was suspended, in 2020, Zhong Meimei was born, imitating the teacher vividly.
Is chocolate delicious? What do you want to ask, is chocolate delicious? Go and buy 54, and buy one for every teacher.
But the video was quickly deleted and disappeared.
Two years later, in 2022, children no longer have to speak, they can grasp all their information by using high technology:
A student's post became popular online because of complaining about doing homework.
The reason is a magical pen. When students use this pen to write on special paper, the handwriting will be recorded in the system background in real time.
Even during the summer vacation, even if the students are not in the classroom, the teacher can remotely monitor students' homework.
When will you start doing your homework and how much time you spend to do your homework, the teacher knows clearly.
So many years have passed, and the space for children to express themselves freely has not been expanded, but has been squeezed smaller and smaller, and even their lives are being supervised at all times.
No matter from the program, video or life, you will never see the true inner expressions of the teenagers in "Boys Talk".
saw only one kid in the mold of "good students" and "good kids".
The more closed their hearts, the blurry their image becomes. Gradually, they stop talking; no one really cares about what they are thinking.
Based on this, it is not difficult to understand that "Youth Talk" is becoming popular from time to time.
Although it is not good enough, there is no other program similar to it or even better than it.
The saddest thing is not why "Youth Says" is not good enough.
instead.
After 4 years, when we look back, we find that the platform that can accommodate "children's cry and voice" is actually only a 5.4-point variety show left.
