Hope that your son will become a dragon and your daughter will become a phoenix. This has been practiced since ancient times. Why did Sun Sanniang force her son to earn his life for her? In the recently popular "Meng Hua Lu", the butcher girl Sun Sanniang wants her son to earn a

Hope that your son will become a dragon and your daughter will become a phoenix. This has been practiced since ancient times.

Why did Sun Sanniang force her son to earn his own life?

In the recently popular " Meng Hua Lu ", the butcher girl Sun Sanniang only wants her son to earn a royal life for herself. When she sees that her good sister Zhao Paner's ex-fiance Ouyang Xu has passed the Jinshi examination, they are all thinking that the sisters will be able to earn a royal life in the future. And extremely happy.

Why does Sun Sanniang have to force her son to work hard and make a living for herself? Because in an era when "scholars, farmers, workers, and merchants" were hierarchical, as a pig-killing trader, your status was extremely low, let alone a woman.

Therefore, Sun Sanniang asked her son to earn a life for herself because she wanted to get rid of her status. Her husband was unreliable, so she could only place her hopes on the child.

The desire for a son to become a dragon and a daughter to be a phoenix is ​​more of a comparison mentality.

Whether it is Sun Sanniang in ancient times or our current parents, they are going further and further on the road of hoping that their sons will become dragons and their daughters will become phoenixes. What about the results of

? Sun Sanniang's son chose his father and stepmother, ruthlessly abandoning the mother who gave birth to him and raised him.

In our real life, news about primary school students, junior high school students and high school students jumping off buildings, jumping into rivers, and committing suicide come one after another. The root cause is that most of them are because their parents’ expectations of "hoping for their sons to become successful and their daughters to become phoenixes" are too heavy!

And how many of us have lived in the shadow of "other people's children" since childhood?

If you don't do well in the exam, your parents will ask you to look at the top student in the class; if you are not efficient at work, your parents will ask you to look at the kid next door... No matter what you do, there will always be "someone else's kid". excellent!

I am lucky in this regard, because other people’s children have not been in my family for too long!

When I was a child, I heard adults talk about other people's children. I retorted angrily, "He is so good, so why don't you let him be your child? Why did you give birth to me?"

Later, my parents rarely mentioned other people's children in front of me. As a child, I won’t feel inferior or worthless.

If you don’t compare other people’s children, you will find that your own child is also very good. He is either lively and cheerful, or well-behaved and sensible, or writes well, or sings well, or is kind-hearted, or polite and civilized...

He always has There are some shining points that other people’s children don’t have! Therefore, don’t compare yourself. , Jackie Chan, and Phoenix are all determined by fate. Why should parents tie themselves up?

said to the children: For yourself, you can choose Jackie Chan or mediocrity.

In recent days, the results of college entrance examinations in various places have been released. Some candidates in various places are happy and some are sad. Some are proud and some are disappointed.

But there are many outstanding children.

I chatted with my colleagues and learned that the leader’s child had recently won first place in the junior and intermediate level of the city’s calligraphy competition. The leader of

said that her child is nothing. There is a top student in her son’s class who is first in grade and first in calligraphy. There is no comparison!

Well, this is called "there are people outside the world and there is a sky outside the world", so what are we comparing to? Who should I compare with?

Therefore, I often tell my children that learning is their own, not to cope with it, nor to show it to anyone. The knowledge and methods you have learned are your own and no one else can take them away.

I will also tell my children that if you work really hard, then it will be fine, the result is not the most important.

End:

We can bury "hoping for a son to become a dragon and a daughter to become a phoenix" as a wish in our hearts, but please lower your expectations and remember not to compare!

"Dragon begets dragon, phoenix begets phoenix, and mice's children can make holes." There is nothing wrong with having high standards and strict requirements for your children, but please stay sensible and try to accept mediocrity in your children.