fragment 1:
Girl: "Let's break up." Boy: "It's okay to break up, let me hold your hand for the last time." The girl agreed, and the boy smiled: "If you can break free from my hand, I agree to break up." The girl used a lot of strength to break free from the boy's hand. The boy immediately turned around and left. The girl suddenly understood something. When she caught up with the boy, she said, "You took the opportunity to wipe back the ring you gave me."
Fragment 2:
A rich woman was walking with her dog and met a beggar on the road.
She taunted the beggar arrogantly: "You don't care how my dog barks, Dad, I'll give you a hundred yuan!"
The beggar said, "What if I bark ten times?"
The rich woman said happily: "I'll give you a thousand!"
The beggar immediately shouted "Dad" to the dog ten times, attracting a crowd of spectators. In full view of everyone, the rich woman had no choice but to pay him.
The beggar took the money and shouted repeatedly: "Thank you, Mom! Thank you, Mom!
Fragment 3:
"My friend was beaten for being a bitch. After a few days, the family of the person who hit him came over to apologize, carrying fruits, and a few tortoises . When you come in, say: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, whatever. My buddy said: It's okay, just come and come. And you brought all your family members with you? As a result, I stayed in bed for two more days. "
Fragment 4:
Once a male colleague in our company quarreled with a female colleague! Suddenly the male colleague praised the female colleague for her handsome appearance! The female colleague was overjoyed! Female colleague: "Really? Really? How can you tell? Male colleague: "Your appearance makes your husband lose all desire and he can only focus on his career!" "
Fragment 5:
classmate interviewed for a large company, and two people were admitted, and about fifty or sixty people signed up. The question was: Let the examiner remember you in the shortest time. My classmate didn't say a word, but gave the examiner a mouthful. Ba, he turned around and ran away. He thought about it for a long time and gave up.
The director and the section chief farted and said to the section chief: No. I put it there. Soon the section chief was dismissed. The director said at the meeting: You can't even take on big things, so what's the use of you?
Fragment 7:
The bee chases the butterfly, but the butterfly marries a snail. Bee wondered: How is he better than me? Butterfly replied: After all, I have my own house, unlike you living in a dormitory.
Fragment 8:
saw "The food in the canteen can only be fed to pigs, but it is still given to us?" "I thought of a sentence. A classmate went to the cafeteria to cook. After the meal, he asked the cook, "Master, why is there rice in your sand!!!"
Fragment 9:
When I was a sophomore, all the girls in the dormitory liked Zhou Huajian's songs, and a tape was played by everyone. One day, the girl on the upper bunk asked: Where is my Zhou Huajian? The girl on the lower bunk replied: There was silence for two seconds, and then they all fell on the bed.
Fragment 10:
That year, when I was still young, my dad and I went to his immediate boss’s place to pay New Year greetings. The boss’s son was there with a pile of books flipping through. My dad: "Your son is very knowledgeable and can read ten lines at a time, which is admirable!" My dad patted me on the head after saying that: "Learn more!" I said: "Okay, okay!" My boss's son: "Dad, in which book did you put my money as a bookmark? Can't find it? Here we are..."
Fragment 11:
Early in the morning, there was a man honking his horn downstairs and shouting: "Whose van... has such a parking... it's blocking my car! "Woke me up from my dream. I angrily opened the curtains and scolded downstairs: "You are sick, you are making so much noise so early in the morning, so I deliberately parked the car blocking you!" "The man got out of the car and smashed the windshield of the van... Later there was a fight downstairs, and I continued to sleep.
Fragment 12:
My wife went to work, and I took care of my two-year-old son.My son asked me: Dad, what is my last name? I said: Baby, my father’s surname is Zhang and your surname is Zhang too! Son: But why does mom say my surname is Wang? I was shocked: "When did you say that?" My son said: Mom always calls me bastard...
Fragment 13:
called the goddess: "The number you dialed has been stopped." He decisively charged 50 yuan. I thought I finally had a chance to perform! ! Ha ha. Called again: "Sorry, the phone you dialed has been turned off."
Fragment 14:
played checkers with his 5-year-old daughter. The phone rang, and it was my friend Lao Hou. I said hello: "Hello, Brother Hou!" and started chatting with him enthusiastically. At this time, my daughter ran over and stared at me with eyes full of reverence without saying a word. After I finished chatting, I put down the phone and asked my daughter: "What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me like this?" My daughter asked in a low voice: "Dad, how did you meet Sun Wukong ?"
Fragment 15:
A man was starving to death in the desert when he picked up the magic lamp.
Magic Lamp: "I can only grant you one wish, please tell me quickly, I'm in a hurry."
person: "I want a wife..."
Magic Lamp immediately transformed into a beautiful woman, and then said disdainfully: "I'm almost starving to death and I'm still greedy for beauty!" sad! "After saying that, he disappeared.
people: "...Cake. "
Hahaha, it would be a tragedy if I didn't say it all at once!
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