1. I missed the bus at work, so I chased the bus. A man riding an electric scooter shouted next to the bus: "Come on!" A warm current suddenly surged in my heart. Just when I wanted to express my feelings about the beauty of the world, the man shouted again: "Master, come on, don't let this guy catch up!"
2. Not long after the snail and the elephant got married, the elephant died. While burying the elephant, the snail cried bitterly: "My dear, why did you go so early? I will bury you if I don't do anything else in my life!"
3. When I saw the class goddess posting on WeChat Moments, I said: "I feel that you rarely post on WeChat Moments, and you are not like other girls at all. You share in WeChat Moments all day long."
She: "Actually, I also post every day, but you can't see it."
Me ? ? ? ? . . . .
4, The neighbor’s children came to my house to play and broke my tablet.
I asked him why he stood on the tablet to play with, and he said: I thought it was an electronic scale.
Then why are you jumping around?
He said he thought the electronic scale was not working.
I really wanted to beat him up, but considering that he was my son after all, I let it go.
4. One day, a colleague was out of breath chasing the last bus. While chasing, he shouted: Master! Master, wait for me~
Suddenly a passenger poked his head out of the car window and said to me slowly: Wukong. Just stop chasing me!!!
6, I asked my best friend: "What would you think if someone gave you one million in exchange for your boyfriend?"
Best friend: "Great, this is a double blessing!"
7. A guy who has been practicing Sanda for three years saw that I was tall and tall, so he insisted on practicing with me. Within two minutes I pushed him to the ground and beat him wildly. He stood up and said sadly: "I have been practicing Sanda for three years, but you pushed me to the ground and beat me. It was all in vain!" I have practiced Sanda for 12 years, I will tell you! Hum, people with real skills are so low-key.
8. When ordering, the waiter asked if I wanted a big bowl or a small bowl. Seeing how handsome the waiter was, I wanted to make fun of it, so I asked, "How big is the big bowl? Is it as big as my face?"
The waiter stared at me and said, "Sorry, it's not as big as your face. We only have a vegetable basin!"
Me. . .
9, An employee asked his boss for a salary increase. The boss said to him: "Although our company is small, we are full of talents. You saw the old man in the communication room. He has a son with tens of millions of assets. He is still working here and his salary is only 900 yuan. The cleaning lady who mopped the floor just now has a son who drives an Mercedes-Benz . Her salary is also 900 yuan. This typist has three houses in her family and her salary is only 1,200. I will give you 1,500. It is not low. If you do a good job, it can be increased! "After a month, the staff realized that the boss was not lying. The old man in the receptionist's office was the boss's father, the cleaning aunt was her mother, and the typist was his wife.
10, Just now, a car in front of me suddenly braked and stopped in the middle of the road, with various horns behind it. At this moment, a hand stretched out from the car window, holding a torn off steering wheel and waved it, and everyone suddenly fell silent.
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