A few days ago, " Twenty-Five-Don't Confused 2" ushered in the finale. In the play, Jiang Xiaoguo faced "Love only accounts for 10%" 's 's week search and "100% pay" , and finally chose qsong, which made Xiaotong and many viewers feel sorry for qshot for qs in the end.
Speaking of Xunguo CP, many friends who follow the drama are probably familiar with it. In the play, Zhou Xun confessed to Jiang Xiaoguo: "I like you, but now I do have more important things... Compared to my work, love only accounts for 10% at most."
Zhou Xun's 10% view of love has caused huge controversy among netizens, and many people said they could not accept it: "10% likes, too little" ; some netizens also expressed their understanding: "Adult love is just a seasoning for life, not a necessity" ; "10% is enough, work is the first priority" .
Xiaotong wants to know, if you were Jiang Xiaoguo, would you choose a man whose love accounts for only 10%?
The proportion of love in life has always been a hot topic of public discussion. Xiaotong also found a topic voting online. What is the reason why # makes you unwilling to invest in love to a higher degree?
Data shows that 58.6% of people think that the more invests, the easier it is to be hurt in love; still has 50% of people, because is worried that their investment will not get the reward they deserve.
So, when love comes , what should we do? Xiaotong summarized the following three points:
1
Step into love with awareness
Xiaotong believes that before entering into a relationship, we must first be clear about what we want, which will make it easier for us to find the person who truly suits us.
You should know that A person who can see her heart clearly is also sure about her choices , because she knows why she is attracted to the other party, and such feelings will often last longer.
In the play, Jiang Xiaoguo finally chose Qi Song in the face of Zhou Xun's confession because she knew very clearly what she wanted now. Although Zhou Xun was her white moonlight, it was difficult for her not to be moved in the face of Qi Song's unreserved love.
In the relationship, Qi Song gave Jiang Xiaoguo enough confidence in facing difficulties. He let Xiaoguo know that as long as she turns back, she can find him at any time.
He respects Xiaoguo, appreciates and praises Xiaoguo, and never interferes with her choices; although he gives without reservation, he will follow his own wishes, rather than blindly sinking into himself.
Compared with Zhou Xun's weighing the pros and cons, Qi Song can give Jiang Xiaoguo a sense of security more.
2
A brave heart treats love
"People are good at testing, not brave". Xiaotong found that when facing feelings, some people would think that as long as they don’t love too much and keep something in their relationship, they will not be hurt in love and they will not be afraid of being let down.
In Xiaotong's opinion, dares to love others is essentially not loving yourself enough.
As TED speech "Update the Fear of Love" says: "You reject something because past experiences tell you that this thing is not good."
Self-negative view of love makes it difficult for people to open their hearts. When you meet someone who makes you moved, you may choose to suppress your inner impulses and dare not take the initiative to approach the other person; or after receiving the other person's signal, you choose to respond perfunctorily. In the long run, it will only be able to distance each other.
Xiaotong believes that love is a process of constant trial and error. When we treat this relationship sincerely, we will intuitively see the other person’s strengths and weaknesses, and then know whether the other person is the right person.
When love comes, only by loving without reservation, bravely delivering one's sincerity, and seriously expecting the other party's equal response, can this relationship not be disappointed.
3
tear off the inherent tags of the past
Love is a beautiful thing. Xiaotong investigates the students who come to Tong Love to learn and find that some people will bring the harm they suffered in the past and their self-summarized experience into the next relationship.
They will find a certain weakness of each other in their relationship, or temporarily have unreconciliational conflicts with each other, so they feel that their "label" has been confirmed.
"I will mess up this relationship in the end; they will all leave me"; I know that I will be disappointed in the end"; and even more, I define this relationship myself: "I don't deserve love".
You should know that when you have a solid tag for yourself, it will affect your interpretation and judgment of other people's behavior, and the way you manage your relationship. This is the result of self-prophecy.
Xiaotong believes that we might as well try to replace these solidified and stereotyped tags with growth tags . For example: "I haven't learned how to cherish the other person yet", instead of "I will mess up this relationship.
Xiaotong believes that we might as well try to replace these solidified and stereotypic tags with growth tags . For example: "I haven't learned how to cherish the other person yet", instead of "I will mess up this relationship.
Xiaotong believes that we might as well try to replace these solidified and stereotypic tags with growth tags . For example: "I haven't learned how to cherish the other person yet", instead of "I will mess up this relationship.
Xiaotong believes that we might as well try to replace these solidified and stereotypic tags with growth tags . For example: "I haven't learned how to cherish the other person yet", instead of "I will mess up this relationship. ”.
“I just haven’t learned how to manage my relationship yet”, not “I knew I couldn’t have love”.
Xiaotong always feels that intimacy is to make both parties better, to add color to life and to add our love for life.
In love, only if we invest more, be more patient and understand each other, and always be aware of each other’s changes, the other party can also feel our investment and care, so that both parties can develop in a good direction through constant running-in.
pay attention to Tong Love, makes marriage beautiful and family happy.
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