Recently, "'s sister that rides the wind and waves" has brought Yu Wenwen back into the public eye. The evaluation of her has also changed from the initial criticism that she was unruly and having too high a self-esteem to the current mixed praise and criticism.
Yu Wenwen is talented, but he doesn’t seem to have left us more familiar songs. Usually when people mention Yu Wenwen, their first reaction is that she sang "Decent" in her ex.
"It's too late to make a big deal, so just keep the dignity of saying goodbye. Breaking up should be dignified. Don't say sorry to anyone. Why should you owe anything..."
The lyrics and melody of this song will make everyone who has experienced a breakup feel sad.
Relationships are most afraid of being muddled and disconnected, that's for sure. But can people we once loved deeply get together and be separated so easily?
Maybe the person who broke up the relationship is no longer in love. But the person who broke up passively said that it was easy to get together and part ways, but he was just deceiving himself.
It’s hard to let go of someone you’ve loved deeply. You can’t just say “forget it” and say goodbye to the person you hold in your heart.
I have heard this saying: If you have not been broken up in love, you do not understand love; if you have not been frustrated, you do not understand life.
's forced breakup is an unfinished matter, which is called " Zeigarnik memory effect " in psychology. This is a thorn in the heart that is difficult to remove.
There is a saying in Li Shutong 's "Wan Qing Ji": "If you don't forget it, there will be echoes."
But in the world of emotions, if you don't forget it, it can only make us more painful and difficult to extricate ourselves. This kind of obsession and obsession is a spiritual self-impression, but in the end it is often just wishful thinking and a waste of time.
Whether we are being broken up with or have a crush on someone, we certainly hope that our thoughts will be responded to by the other person. Convey your feelings skillfully while preserving your own face and not hurting the feelings between the two parties.
But many times, when we express our feelings, the response we get is not what we want. If you give up your mind, you will be liberated; if you cannot untie it, you will become a dead knot.
These are humble feelings, are they what you want? As long as you have him by your side, no matter what you do, it will be fine. How long can you persist in this obsession?
After the hit drama "Struggle" was completed, Ma Yili announced that she was in love with Wen Zhang, who was nine years younger than her. This sibling relationship was not favored by the world for a time, but eventually there was a real betrayal.
Ma Yili's words "do it and cherish it" gave countless people strength and gave the article a way to turn back.
Even later, Ma Yili's attitude towards the outside world was gentle, and she did not go out of her way to reveal the truth of the article, and she was reticent. We thought that the two of us would really get together and part ways easily.
But a few years later, Yao Di got married, and Ma Yili divorced Wen Zhang. Many people lamented at this time that Ma Yili still didn't let go after all.
Talented woman Yishu once said: "When a man doesn't love you, everything you do is wrong. Your crying is wrong, your silence is wrong, living is wrong, and even death is wrong. Wrong. "
Since we don't love each other anymore, let's break up." But separation is not as simple as imagined.
I can't think of any way to say goodbye to the past in a non-sentimental and decent way. Many times we can deceive others, but we cannot deceive ourselves.
Ask yourself, can you really sincerely bless the other person after breaking up and say: "I hope you live a happy life"?
When you can't forget someone, don't force yourself to get together and part ways. Every time we meet, every blessing is plucked out of our hearts.
Some people say that since you are an adult, you should do what adults should do. When the other person no longer loves you, you should exit gracefully.
But why should I be so sensible? I am so sensible, who am I hurting? Who is it that makes it perfect?
We don’t want dignity, only magnanimity.
Only by clearly understanding the true relationship between each other can we give ourselves the courage to leave, give up hope, and untie the knot that keeps us awake late at night.
No one wants to be stuck in the swamp of emotions and cannot extricate themselves. Dignity and courage need to be regained by oneself. When we have the courage to love each other, we have the confidence not to love each other, but we don't want to stir up a pot of porridge and leave unclearly.
If you don't love, it will be easier to "get together and stay together easily". A truly decent breakup is to let go of someone completely, but someone you have loved deeply cannot do that.
What are we living for? Not for others. Since you can't do it yourself, why bother pretending to smile, why bother yourself for the sake of others' comfort and relief.
When we want to let go, we will naturally let go, but the prerequisite is to remember that it is not for others, not for dignity, but for ourselves.
Give yourself a buffer period and don't push yourself so hard. Breaking up is sometimes like falling in love. At that moment, at a time point that I didn't expect, I fell in love so easily and let go of it so easily.
Since ancient times, life has been full of gatherings and separations, so don’t do those symbolic self-comforts. You can be successful on your own, but don’t suppress yourself.
We are not messing around, nor are we making public announcements, but when I really have not let go, there is no need to lie and claim that I have already let go for your peace of mind.
You can go to your world to be happy, or I can stay alone in my world and be sad. I won’t interfere with you, and you can’t force me.
Now that you have decided to break up, don't force, don't hold back, don't be pretentious, and don't be hysterical. This is the final dignity. But I also have the right to be sad, to vent, to pay tribute to my own love.
As Stephen Chow said: "You can never forget someone you love seriously. You think you are missing a person, but in fact you are missing a whole life."
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The world is so big, thank you you can see me!
[Article | Wei Wei'an: The pen is warm and speaks for love. An atypical writer who loves words invites you to experience life together]
