Marriage is the second reincarnation for women. Whether a happy marriage life in the future is closely related to the man you choose, and it is also closely related to the family behind the man.
Love is a matter for two people, but marriage is a matter for two families. A woman who is immersed in love is mostly irrational in her mind. She recognizes a man. Even if there is a deep abyss ahead, a woman who is blinded by love will jump down without hesitation.
However, if a woman wants to be happy all the time and want to have a happy and beautiful marriage, then it is necessary to remain rational and carefully observe the character and qualities of men and family members behind the man before getting married, so as to avoid encountering all kinds of unnecessary troubles in the long future marriage life.
Xia Yang and Lu Ming met through blind dates.
After graduating from Xiayang University, he returned to his hometown to start a business and opened a beauty shop. He is a veritable female boss. Perhaps due to the influence of his experiences such as studying and entrepreneurship, Xia Yang also has extremely high requirements for future partners. Seeing that he was already in his third year, Xia Yang's parents were also very anxious, worried that their daughter would not get married, so they asked people everywhere to introduce Xia Yang to her partner. Xia Yang has always met many blind dates due to human relationships, but he has never met a single one. But Lu Ming is an exception.
Lu Ming, with a high school education, is a chef who runs a small restaurant at home. No matter in terms of appearance, education, or personal ability, Lu Ming is not in line with Xia Yang. But it was such a boy who was not sweet-mouthed and had a handsome face who successfully captured Xia Yang's heart in a stupid and silly way.
After meeting Lu Ming, Xia Yang felt that all the previous ideas about his partner had disappeared. Lu Ming in front of him was her ideal partner, a down-to-earth person who can give her happiness and security. For Lu Ming, every frown and smile of Xia Yang would make him moved. He secretly decided to marry Xia Yang and give her a happy life.
Since the two went on a blind date, the two have met and dated almost every day. Men and women in love always want to stay together at all times. After all, the two of them were also at the age of marriage. More than two months after the blind date, they began to talk about marriage.
Lu Ming has a house and a car at home, and a small restaurant. Xia Yang owns a scooter and a beauty shop. The two of them have similar material conditions and are of equal strength. Soon they talked about the engagement.
For engagement, according to local customs, the man needs to prepare gifts and betrothal gifts for the woman. The gift is usually 88,000,000,000... Of course, the more the better, depending on the financial situation of each family. The betrothal gifts are usually chicken, duck, fish, meat, fruit, tobacco and alcohol, etc., four servings per serving. Of course, the woman also has a reward gift. Depending on the man’s gift, part of the gift will be paid, and half of the betrothal gift will be returned.
Regarding gifts and betrothal gifts, Xia Yang's mother also told Xia Yang: "No matter how much gifts are given, your father and I will not leave a penny, and leave them in your hands. You save them yourself and take them back to your small family as a reserve fund for your small family. We have no requirements for how much gifts the man gives, but you have to know that from the amount of gifts the man gives, we can see how much the man attaches importance to the woman." After , my mother and Xia Yang also gave examples of the gifts from several relatives and sisters who got married in the past two years, which were basically more than 100,000 yuan.
Lu Ming also discussed the gift and betrothal gift with Xia Yang. When he heard that Xia Yang hoped that the gift was more than 100,000 yuan, Lu Ming was surprised at the time. Lu Ming said: "My family doesn't have that much money. My family's savings over the years have been spent on buying a house and decorating the house. My parents said that they can take out at most 48,000 yuan. You see, many people don't need bride gifts when they get married, and many places don't have gifts when they get engaged, otherwise we don't need gifts either. Anyway, mine is yours after marriage."
After hearing this, Xia Yang was helpless. He didn't want the relationship between the two people because of money. Xia Yang could only agree. After all, Lu Ming's family could not be allowed to empty their family's fortune because of the engagement. Xia Yang's parents heard that there was no gift for the engagement. Although they were unhappy, Xia Yang had already agreed and they had no choice.
In this way, Xia Yang and Lu Ming's engagement banquet were getting closer and closer. Lu Ming's family also began to buy the things needed for the betrothal gift. Just the day before the engagement banquet, Xia Yang asked with concern: "Have you bought all the betrothal gifts? "Lu Ming's answer made Xia Yang stunned for a moment...
Lu Ming said: "Don't worry, my parents are all ready. We will come to your house to hire you early tomorrow morning. If you say to your parents, you don’t need to return the gift, because my family has sent four copies, and your family has to return two copies, so my family just sends two copies, so your family doesn’t need to return it, so that both parties can save trouble! ”
Xia Yang felt uncomfortable after hearing this. Although on the surface, giving four copies back two copies, the final result is similar to sending two copies directly, this process always makes people feel something is wrong. Thinking that parents care about face very much, and relatives and friends at home come tomorrow. The man’s approach would make his parents lose face.
Xia Yang told his mother about the betrothal gift, and his mother said bluntly: “History of is uncertain. It would be better if you don’t marry someone like this. If you compromise now and marry someone like this, don’t expect them to cherish and value you in the future. "
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Xia Yang thought about it and felt wronged: he did not have any excessive requirements, but just asked the other party to do it according to the local engagement customs. Why even this is the case, the other party has to deduct all kinds of deductions, and save as much as possible?
In the end, Xia Yang made up his mind that the marriage would not be enrolled. Although he had notified his relatives and friends, a marriage that was destined to be unrespected, so why should he continue for the sake of others' eyes? Xia Yang decisively rejected the engagement with his parents' support.
Xia Yang said to Lu Ming: " I like you, not because I want your money, I have it myself! What I like is your love and care for me! And through engagement, I found that you care too much. Whether it is gifts or betrothal gifts, I can't see the importance you and your parents attach to me, nor the love and care you give me.
You men always say that women are materialistic. Do men not want to spend a penny on marriage and want to marry a wife for nothing? Is this love for women? I love you, but I am not stupid. I can’t imagine a family that calculates all kinds of gains and losses before marriage. How great is it to marry a wife who comes into the house after marriage!
Although I am almost 3 years old, I am not unable to get married. I would rather choose a high-quality single than enter a marriage full of calculating and without warmth and love! "
After being regretted, Lu Ming and his parents realized what they did inappropriately. Although Lu Ming admitted his mistake overnight and apologized, Lu Ming's parents said they could buy other betrothal gifts immediately, but Xia Yang was still unmoved.
The deep affection in love, when it comes to talking about marriage, all turned into a cruel trade-off for interests. When the relationship between two people becomes a matter for two families, the relationship is no longer so pure, and the competition between interests between each other begins to be officially revealed.
A man who is willing to give you money may not necessarily love you; but a man who is unwilling to give you money will definitely not love you that much. Just as Xia Yang's mother said: "I don't ask you to find a rich person, but I hope the partner you are looking for is a person who has ten yuan and is willing to spend nine yuan for you."
Yes, a man who truly loves you will not care about his own gains and losses, but will only do his best to satisfy your wishes and give you the best! There is a saying that says: part of love is the soul; the other part of love is the body; there is also part of love, which is not so important, but it cannot be ignored, that is money!
I hope that Xia Yang's affairs can remind unmarried women: before entering marriage, be sure to keep a clear mind, examine the importance of the man and his family to you, make correct judgments, and keep a good eye for your future.
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