I have a friend who has been single for many years. Some time ago, I started dating a boy with a friend. It was something worthy of blessing, but she was deeply trapped in it. She wanted to share the sweetness at all times when she was happy, and she was depressed when she was lost and fell into self-blame and distress, worried about gains and losses, and was affected by the other person's words every day.
becomes emotional in love, and it is irrational to put all your attention on the other person. Love is a very beautiful thing, but once it becomes " love brain ", it will be very bad for yourself, the other person, and the friends around you. So, how to stay awake in love?
In a relationship, the other party is actually just a mirror. In the end, what you have to deal with is the relationship between me and yourself, your emotional and emotional value, and the ultimate person in charge of the pain is himself.
So, before entering a relationship, you might as well ask yourself a few questions:
What kind of person am I?
What is my shining point?
What are my deep anxiety and fear?
What is my point attracting him?
What do I like/don’t like?
What are my principles and bottom lines?
What is my need in my relationship?
Through these questions, you will be able to think more clearly whether you are worthy of being loved and whether you have the ability to be loved and be loved.
It doesn’t matter if there is no answer yet, but you should keep trying to make new self-confirmation in love.
In love, you should maintain rationality and sensibility at the same time, and feel the happiness of love and being loved with your heart, but you should also be separated and continue to observe, explore and understand yourself rationally.
Never give up improving yourself. Many people are insecure in love and feel that they are "not worthy of" the other person, so they will worry about gains and losses. Inferiority is because one is afraid that one will lose the other person if one is not good enough.
Everyone has their own life and their own strengths. There is no need to change themselves in order to cater to the other party, including work and hobbies.
When entering a relationship, you must think clearly about the proportion of love in life. When love becomes the whole of life, it is actually you who entrust all the initiative in your life.
Some people occasionally find that the two people have different ideas when they are in love, but in order to maintain consistency or maintain the so-called tacit understanding, they compromise for each other.
Some people do not have their own thoughts in their relationships because their thoughts are often denied by the other party, and they become unconfident, dare not express their thoughts, and dare not have any differences with the other party.
But this is not our problem. We should communicate with the other party in time and tell TA: It is normal for us to have different ideas. I will respect your ideas, and please respect my ideas.
Keep your own opinions and seek common ground while reserving differences, so that the two people will not lose the ability to think independently in their relationship.
After falling in love, open the other party’s circle of friends and social platforms from time to time to check, look for clues, and then stage one drama after another in your heart, unconsciously start to make up for the other party’s psychological activities. This is something that some people will experience.
However, such research suspects not only consumes one's own time and energy, but also causes some unnecessary misunderstandings.
The analysis of word phrases may be just a reasoning for fragments. If you have any questions or ideas, it will be much better to say them directly than to think endlessly.
Love is not "no way to do without you", but "it's better with you".
I hope everyone can maintain themselves in their relationships, maintain rationality, and gain a better self in love and being loved.
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