What women fear most is that they marry the wrong person. There are too many top-notch men, so it’s better for men. If there is a good mother-in-law, you can try to break it back. But if even the in-laws' family is the best among the best, then the man will be helpless. If a woman does not choose to divorce, she will probably have to survive.
In real life, there are still many such men. They all performed well before marriage, but after marriage, they began to reveal their true colors. They are generally good at calculating and do not regard their wives as their own family when they get married, and they are still guarding against others. If we just guard against others, we can still say that he is very cautious.
But they are both guarding against others and expecting them to fulfill their wife's obligations. When there is something wrong, they will ask their wife to do their part for their in-laws' family.
If the in-laws sincerely accept their daughter-in-law from the beginning, then it is also appropriate for those who are daughter-in-law to do their part when they have something to do.
But if the mother-in-law treats her daughter-in-law like a thief, and when something happens, she will show that you are a part of this family and should work hard, then who will be happy? It would be nice not to turn against each other directly.
Wang Qian (pseudonym) met such a husband and such a family member. She felt that she must have done a lot of bad things in her previous life, so that she could marry into such a family in this life.
She and Ge Qiang (pseudonym) got married on a blind date. Both of them are old and their families are in a hurry to urge them. They themselves think it's time to find someone to get married. So, after getting to know each other through blind dates, we quickly got together.
Higher blind dates are more realistic. At this age, we don’t value relationships much. If we can live together, it’s best if we can have feelings after marriage. If it doesn’t work, then the two of us will run a family together and it’s nothing to live together.
This is the common idea of the two people, and it is also a tacit understanding that has not been expressed. Wang Qian thought that even if the two of them could not get along after marriage, they should be able to support each other and live their lives.
After all, neither of them is the kind of person who is strong in picking the top, nor is it the kind of person who speaks rudely and mean. Therefore, you should not often quarrel or fight after marriage.
But after getting married, Wang Qian realized that she was still too simple. The day after getting the marriage certificate , Ge Qiang actually asked her for the AA system. Although Wang Qian felt very uncomfortable, she thought that she was old and could not stand the trouble, so she agreed.
Although she didn't make a fuss and agreed very happily, because of this, her impression of Ge Qiang had completely changed. She no longer had her original aspirations for this marriage and she had no sense of belonging to this family.
So, afterwards, she only thought that Ge Qiang was her roommate and was just face-saving to her in-laws. She didn't care about her in-laws' affairs, and she only cared about what she should care about her family affairs.
Later, even if she had a child, she strictly implemented the AA system in accordance with the original regulations. When it comes to children's affairs, she also asked Ge Qiang to bear more. Because she gave birth to the child, she suffered a lot of crimes in order to give birth to the child, which Ge Qiang could not share, so this arrangement was fair.
At this time, Ge Qian was already a little regretful. Wang Qian was a strong woman and earned no less money than him. In fact, if he didn't implement the AA system, he would not lose. It’s just that he was too cautious at the beginning and just thought about how to prevent Wang Qian. He never thought that he would look down on his little salary at all.
Later, he realized this problem, but since then, he was embarrassed to go back on his word. Sometimes, when he sees his child tired, he will think, if he did not mention the AA system and hand over his salary to Wang Qian on time every month, can he be a manager like other men?
But everything is just a hypothesis. As long as things happen, it will be impossible to reverse again. Everyone can only look forward. Ge Qiang also understood this truth. So I've been living like this.
Time passes quickly, and 5 years pass quickly.Over the past five years, Ge Qiang felt that he and Wang Qian were not like couples at all, but more like partners. The only intersection between two people is children.
He felt that their marriage was really in danger. At this moment, his mother suddenly came over and told Wang Qian that if his brother-in-law wants to get married, the whole family must do their best to contribute to his brother-in-law's wedding house. Therefore, the AA system will be abolished first, and it will not be too late to get the AA system solved.
Ge Qiang felt a little hot when he heard this, but he didn't say anything against it. Speaking of which, he was just selfish. He knew that his wife's salary was getting higher and higher over the years, and she must have a lot of savings.
would be better if I could help my younger brother. I can only say that they are really mother and son, who are both selfish and shameless. Wang Qian felt a little disgusted. She had been in such a family for so many years.
She felt that her child had also been born and married, and she would no longer be called an old girl, so the divorce should be put on the agenda. She would rather live alone than continue to live with Ge Qiang.
Besides, she has the ability to make money, and it is okay to raise children by herself, so why continue to feel frustrated? Besides, the child is getting older, so it’s okay to find a nanny to pick him up or ask his mother’s family, but men are useless.
so she started to curse and told them all about their shameless behavior over the years. Then it said that buying a house is nothing to do with her brother-in-law. It used to be a family, but it was really not a family from now on.
Wang Qian filed for divorce after scolding. My mother-in-law was stunned. Why did she develop to the point of getting divorced? Didn’t she just mention a small matter? But no matter what she thought, the two finally divorced.
After learning that the two of them had really divorced, Ge Qiang's mother blamed herself, thinking that she had harmed her son and had lost her son's good family. But Ge Qiang understood that if you blame this, you can only blame yourself, because he did not become a good husband.
Later, both of them got married. Ge Qiang changed his mind and tried to be a good husband. Wang Qian also found a good man and lived a happy life of harmony between husband and wife.
From this story, we can understand two truths.
1. After marriage, women should never let themselves suffer losses. If their in-laws are good to them, then they should be the same. However, if their in-laws are foolish and want to take advantage of themselves, then they should not take care of others and live their own life well. If they really can't live, then they should divorce. This is the state that women should have after marriage.
Many women live a frustrated life after marriage, because she has not adjusted her mentality. She just wanted to please her in-laws, and she never thought about what kind of life she wanted to live.
Women should not let themselves be wronged after marriage. They should worry more about their feelings in life, and care more about themselves. Don’t care too much about other people’s opinions, and don’t care too much about their husband’s feelings. Only those who live a better life can live.
so, women should not let themselves suffer losses after marriage. If the in-laws are good to you, then you should return to the same kind of good. But if the in-laws are always flirting with you and want to take advantage of you, then don’t take care of others and live your own life well. If you really can’t live, then divorce. This is the state that a woman should have after marriage.
2. As a mother-in-law, if you know that your son is doing something wrong, you must think about guiding your son to develop in a good direction. Only in this way can your son get better and better. Extreme selfishness and bias will only make your daughter-in-law even more heartbroken and make your son completely discontent. In this way, don’t expect your daughter-in-law to share the joys and sorrows with this family.
In a marriage, men are more selfish and unreliable, and women may choose to continue to live because of their children's scores. But if even the mother-in-law is not reliable and just thinks about cheating and plotting against her daughter-in-law, then the woman will definitely lose confidence in this marriage.
So, as a mother-in-law, knowing that her son is doing something wrong, you must think about guiding his son to develop in a good direction. Only in this way can the son get better and better. Extreme selfishness and bias will only make the daughter-in-law even more heartbroken and make the daughter-in-law completely disconnected. In this way, don’t expect the daughter-in-law to share the joys and sorrows with this family.
text/Wiwen
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