article: Yanran
Why is the other party changing so much before and after marriage?
When you are in love, the other party is a gentle, understanding, beautiful and charming little woman; or the other party is a sunny gentleman, careful and considerate man who gives you a strong sense of security.
However, after entering the palace of marriage, it completely subverted your original view.
In a love period when the relationship is still strong, each other will make compromises to please each other.
For example: You don’t like to eat pasta, but the other party wants to eat it, and you won’t disturb the other party’s interest, so you agree to eat pasta. When you see the other party eating with relish, you will pretend to enjoy the food in front of you to make him happy.
In the period of strong feelings, the current compromise is real and willing. After entering the marriage hall, each other will slowly reveal their true colors and completely show their true self in front of the closest and trusted people.
If you can, please try to show your true side before entering the marriage, so that you can better avoid some conflicts after marriage and get along with each other more harmoniously, otherwise the running-in after marriage will be very hard.
If you love me, you must listen to me, otherwise you will not love me.
Men will think that women are willful, while women will think that willfulness is a woman’s privilege and you must be patient.
In such a mode of getting along, the emergence of contradictions is inevitable.
When it was late at night, I suddenly felt that I was living such a bad life now.
Before getting married, why did the beautiful, gentle, lively, confident and generous self disappear?
Why do I now have a unkempt and dirty face, my face is covered with fine lines and my skin is dark yellow, I have a bad temper, I unknowingly nagging, I feel worried and troubled all day long, etc. There is basically no good sleep, nor the moment of laughing from the bottom of my heart. Why does
have this phenomenon?
When you are still single or have no marriage bonds, you just need to work hard and work happily. Have enough time to dress up and learn what you are interested in.
All your attention is on yourself.
However, it is completely different after marriage.
All your attention is on your husband or child. I have various requirements and demands for my husband.
seeks rewards for children, because you will feel that you have spent so much time and energy on your children, and you will hope that your children will be better than the children of your friends in all aspects.
For the closest people, it is often easy to have a sense of control and expectation.
You will think that all your efforts must be received accordingly. Otherwise, you will easily ignite your inner dissatisfaction and anxiety.
For this transformation, it mainly leads to a woman's changes.
You must know how to reduce expectations and control, and transfer more attention from your husband and children to yourself.
For marriage, do it with love and respect.
All the requirements for life are placed on oneself, not on the other person.
The women who are used to asking for are the least adorable because it is a humble and entangled posture.
Women with strong control also have a bad temper. We can make ourselves live a gentler and more elegant life, and don’t live so rude and irritable for the rest of our lives.
Instead of expecting others to change and things will improve, it is better to let yourself learn to make good use of your precious life time, do what you like to do, make your inner strength stronger, and make yourself live a more self-consistent life.
Don’t go with the flow over the years and make yourself worse and worse. You can live your ideal happy life as long as you are willing.
END
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(picture source from the Internet)
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