There are thousands of reasons for breaking up, and the most powerless and annoying thing is "I don't want to delay you."
The sentence "I don't want to delay you" not only puts yourself in a difficult high position, but also makes the other party feel that they will not be injured too seriously.
This seems to be a good deal for those who say this. But for the person who was forced to break up, it was like a chronic poison, struggling repeatedly through retention and persuasion, and finally collapsed...
The person who said he didn't want to delay you was actually afraid that you would delay him
Some people had no feelings for their partner or could not see the hope of going on, so they said: I don't want to delay you.
every word is for the other party, but every word is also clearing the relationship with the other party.
Of course, there are many people in life who encounter special situations. Although the two truly love each other, reality hinders you from union.
, more cases are: I don’t want to delay you because I’m actually afraid that you will delay him.
Usually, when a man says this, a woman should be more or less showing a posture of retaining her before this. When the woman heard his sentence "I don't want to delay you", she felt that the man in front of her was indeed not easy. There must be something unspeakable. She must have endured many unbearables before she must have mustered up the courage to say this...
For a while, the woman had already forgiven the other party with sympathy and even strengthened her determination to follow the other party to suffer.
In just a few days, you will find that no matter if you have helped him with what he said is not delayed or he will try his best to keep you, he will definitely treat you with cold violence, playing and disappearing.
is very simple because he has already made full preparations for leaving. "I don't want to delay you" is just a subtext for "I don't love you anymore".
There is another situation where the person who said this is extremely convinced and cannot be doubted by others. In other words, they subconsciously feel that what they say is heartfelt and not selfish.
This is actually a kind of self-deception that penetrates the brain. Make yourself believe that you are really thinking about the other person, not because you no longer like the other person.
This greatly reduces the guilt of the person involved, and there is no need to admit that his behavior actually hurts more than comfort.
is not firmly chosen, it means not loving
Under any circumstances, it is a kind of respect for true love. Unless face life and death.
Don’t break up with words like “I don’t want to delay you”, “You deserve better”, and “I can’t deserve you”.
In a sense, these statements are just your disclaimer. Even if you really consider it, you still want to escape this responsibility deep down.
If the other party still firmly chooses to follow you when you say such words, then when life is not going well in the future, you can fight back and say that I have told you that this will happen, and that you are determined to do it.
You see, you have already made excuses for your indecision, distrust, and failure to work hard.
My friend Xiao Si and her boyfriend fell in love in college. They were both poor and lonely when they graduated. My boyfriend said to her: Are you sure you want to follow me? He was afraid of delaying Xiao Si.
The subtext of her boyfriend Xiao Si is actually very clear. It turns out that as soon as she graduates, she is no longer her boyfriend's firm choice. After thinking for a few days, she took the initiative and made it clear that she broke up.
In the eyes of others, it seems that Xiao Si is even more cruel. But she understood that even if she pestered her, she was just the other party's choice.
She said that in that relationship, what she saw was that her boyfriend was unwilling to bear the burden of this relationship with her, and did not trust herself or her. To put it bluntly, it just doesn’t love enough.
There are many such examples in life. I have been together for several years and the two parties have reached the age of discussing marriage. The man suddenly said: You deserve something better.
If there are indeed excellent suitors around this girl, then this is a little credible.But if she devotes herself to you and you use such a bad reason to send her, do you think others will believe it?
The so-called premise that you proposed is that you have already assumed a potentially good partner for the other party, and feel that as long as the other party leaves you, you will definitely be able to live a happy life.
But have you ever thought about it: You don’t even believe that you can be good to this girl (boy), but you believe that others can be good to her. Don’t you think it’s absurd?
Or is this your subconscious self-deception. If you think this way, the most essential purpose is to not want to bear the infatuation of breaking up unreasonably.
But then again, for girls, it is actually quite lucky to see clearly that the other person doesn’t love you enough. It is not a pity to lose a man who is timid and afraid of things, is a habit of escaping, and has no blood.
is a little sincere and does not delay each other
We never deny that this situation will occur: many realistic reasons make it difficult for two people who are still in love to get together.
But please be sincere to everyone who faces such a dilemma. Once you don’t love or have no confidence to go on, then you will admit it openly, make clear what you can solve, try to solve the problems that cannot be solved, and get together and part.
You may have a true relationship with this girl (boy), but it is true that you can't give her the ideal life and don't want to bear too much.
Don’t be close to breaking up but choose to escape, and bring out some specious real contradictions as your shield. Finally, I said, "I don't want to delay you."
Of course, when you hear such words, the most important thing for the person who is "dissuaded from" in this way is to judge the other person's true thoughts.
If he is determined to be unable to continue with you, he may really not be able to continue. No matter how you stick to each other, you will be screened out sooner or later.
From another perspective, you can also think carefully. If you are really the person who is suitable for him to move on, how could the other party give up just by saying that he would give up? After all, feelings are the result of the joint action of both parties and cannot be controlled by one party.
There is a saying that goes like this: Men are timid in the face of true love, while women are bold in the face of true love.
So we hope: don’t let down all timidity, and all timidity deserves the caution.
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Thank you for your attention. For more exciting content in terms of emotions, you can also follow the official account [Tu Lei] (ID: tulegongzhonghao).
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