The reader wrote to me and said: One day after get off work, my colleague made an appointment to drink, so I reported to my wife in advance. Before getting off work, it started to rain heavily, and my colleague forgot to close the windows at home when he went out at noon. My coll

The reader wrote to me and said:

One day after get off work, my colleague made an appointment to drink, so I reported to my wife in advance. Before getting off work, it started to rain heavily, and my colleague forgot to close the windows at home when he went out at noon. My colleague was eager to go home, so he broke the appointment. After I arrived home in the rain, I found that there were more men's shoes at the door. At this time, a conversation between my wife and another man came from the bedroom. I pushed open the bedroom door and my wife was lying on the bed with a strange man. The moment my wife and the other person saw me, I punched the man in the face. Then, I pulled the man out of my house. The other party begged for mercy all the way, but I remained silent. It was not until I walked outside the community that I let him go and forced him to explain to me what he and my wife had known each other.

They met through online chatting. The man's house was only one road away from my house. The man and his wife separated for a long time due to work reasons. Because I often drink with my colleagues, he took advantage of the time when I drank and pestered my wife to meet him. Since then, as long as I drink, he will come to my house or my wife to his house. My wife told him that it was not happy to be with me, and said that I was very tempted and ignored my family. My wife also said that they must get along with each other without destroying each other's families. Although my wife is not satisfied with my performance in daily life, I am still the man I love the most. If there was no experience of the sudden rain this time, my wife's betrayal of marriage would continue.

I pinched the man's neck with one hand, slapped the man rhythmically on the face with the other hand, and told him word by word: I will find you and my wife again in the future, be careful that I will break your dog legs. At the same time, I looked at the man carefully and did have a delicate face. The man swore that he would not contact my wife again, so I kicked him and let him disappear from my sight.

Returning home, my wife curled up on the sofa and cried. After I roared at her for more than ten minutes, I went to bed first. That night, my wife slept on the sofa. The next day when I went to work, I received a text message from my wife, but I ignored her. I have been living in my mom's house these days.

There is one thing I can’t figure out: since I fell in love, my wife loved me more. Although I am playful, I am absolutely loyal to my wife. I make two or three phone calls and send three or four messages every day to report my whereabouts to my wife. Why do you keep saying that you love my wife and betray me? When I think of my wife cuckold me, I get crazy; when I think of my dating experience with my wife, I don’t want to get a divorce. I have been married to my wife for three years and originally planned to have children, but I gave up because I often drank. Under the current situation, at least I don’t have the ties to my children yet, so I don’t know if I should divorce?

Muzili Emotional analysis:

Because you are greedy for play, your wife has tasted too much loneliness; because you are greedy for play, it has delayed your wife's right to be a mother; because you are greedy for play, it has given your wife the opportunity to meet netizens and cuckold you. It is you who planted the cause of playing tricks that led to your wife cuckolding you. Although you have a mistake first, this should not be a reason for your wife to date others, because you are not a bad man, at least you are happy to report your whereabouts to your wife every day. Once some injuries are formed, they will definitely leave pain in the heart. Although all injuries will become irrelevant as time goes by, once the injuries are formed, they will still leave a barrier between people invisibly.

The reason why many people's cheating during marriage ends with forgiveness is because they have children. In this case, choosing to forgive is a last resort after weighing the pros and cons. The post-infidelity period does not mean that they can immediately ignore past grudges, because it will take a certain amount of time to treat the harm of their lover's betrayal of marriage. Whether it is cheating during love or cheating before children, I have always advocated the attitude of breaking up and divorce. The reasons I gave: 1) I hate cheating in my heart, and I believe many people are the same; 2) Ensuring loyalty to marriage is the bottom line. Without children, you should have a zero tolerance for betrayal.

There is a saying: I talk to you well, but you think I feel easy to talk to. I also believe that your wife has negotiated with you and even quarreled about you because of your greed for fun, but you regard your wife's anger as in front of you. What I want to say is that after getting married, you should no longer be unruly and indulge in love with freedom like when you are single, because love also requires companionship, responsibility and obligation. A more secular problem: You and your wife clearly know that you have not had children after three years of marriage because you have been drunk for a long time, but in the speculation of outsiders, you may think that you or your wife are infertile. Some sarcastic words will naturally reach your wife's ears. Don't you think your wife is very frustrated in such a marriage?

causes your husband and wife to have a mess, and it is definitely not caused by your wife. Unfortunately, you are still angry at this moment because your wife cheated on you. Maybe many people will instinctively focus on their lover's cheating when encountering such incidents. In fact, they can reflect on their attitude towards their lover. When many things can be considered from the overall perspective, you will find that you actually have many shortcomings in your marriage life, and your lover's cheating behavior is the best punishment for your shortcomings in the process of managing your marriage. In this way, if you examine your lover's cheating behavior, do you feel that you deserve it?

Here is a simple truth: when you are bullied by others in your life, we do need to vent our dissatisfaction, but we must not go to extremes and kill the person who bullies you. Once you go to extremes, what awaits you will definitely be severe punishment from the law. Although I can better understand your wife's anger at your greed for playing, she should not betray her marriage to vent her anger. It means that during the marriage management process, you and your wife are both at fault. Also, because you do not attach enough importance to your marriage life, there are relatively large cracks in your relationship. In addition, humans are emotional animals. When a person who lives with you day and night is withdrawn from his life, he will definitely feel reluctant to leave, but he will not have to bear the consequences for his actions?

is between the above, my advice to you is: divorce. As an adult, everyone should pay for their actions. The end of a relationship does not mean that you no longer believe in love, but that you can reflect deeply on the attitude of managing your relationship at the cost of divorce. After all, everyone understands the great truth, and what really awakens everyone in the end must be the understanding brought to people by the pain after hitting the south wall. Perhaps, after divorce, your wife should understand that she should not use cheating to vent her dissatisfaction with her marriage under any circumstances; and you will also understand that people can have entertainment activities after work, but they also need to give their lover the minimum accompanying. Please consider each other's embarrassment in this relationship as the IQ tax that each other should pay.

Postscript:

The truth of love: There are not two people in this world who are completely co-starring at all. Even the twin brothers and twins will have too many differences, let alone couples. The reason why people look for love at a certain age is because they need to find a companion for themselves, solve their physiological needs, and carry forward the family line. Therefore, in married life, you must accept parts that your lover cannot resonate with. At the same time, you must appropriately restrain some of your behaviors that your lover cares about.

Marriage is to live a life together, especially after having children, perhaps children will become the top priority of the family. At this time, parents will feel the great significance of their children to life. Since many people yearn for marriage, you must ensure loyalty to the marriage after getting married and take care of your lover's feelings. If you continue to do whatever you want after getting married, it will definitely not be advisable.

(The picture is from the Internet, the picture is irrelevant)