Speaking of old age, many old people are very naive. They always think that they have children, pensions and medical insurance, and their life in their old age is guaranteed. No matter how bad they are, they will not live a miserable life.
Indeed, the conditions of our elderly are not bad now. We have various living guarantees, and the children around us are also promising. It stands to reason that we can live a very happy life in our old age. However, there are always exceptions. Whether the elderly live well in their later years is closely related to their own character and ideas, in addition to whether they are filial to their children and whether their lives are secure.
So what kind of old man will live a miserable life in his later years? 3 people who have been there gave the answer using their personal experience!
Uncle Qin: Betrayal of marriage ultimately led to desolation in old age
I am 71 years old. Although I am a retired teacher, my current life is not happy at all. I am alone in my hometown and have no one to accompany me. People support. The reason why I was in this situation was that I did something wrong after I retired.
10 years ago, I retired from my job. With a pension of more than 4,000 yuan every month, I was very carefree. I either went to the chess and card room to play cards or went to the park to sing and dance every day. However, it was this carefree life that made me go astray.
I often go to the park to dance. Over time, I fell in love with a dance partner who is 7 years younger than me. Her name is Axia. Axia is very beautiful. She is the youngest in our dance team and the best dancer. And she was single, so I got very close to her, and gradually we became lovers.
In order to be with Axia, I gave her everything. I often take her shopping and traveling, and I pay for everything wherever I go. I spend a lot of money on Axia. Once the monthly pension arrives, I give her 1,000 yuan as pocket money, and then the rest Most of the 3,000 yuan will be spent on Axia.
At that time, I was obsessed with Axia and wanted to be good to her at all costs. Originally, my wife and I had saved 300,000 yuan in savings, intending to use it for retirement or to buy a house for my grandson in the future, but Axia said she wanted to buy a car. The car was running so that he could come to see me more easily, so I secretly withdrew my 130,000 yuan deposit and bought Axia a car. Later, Axia borrowed 70,000 to 80,000 yuan from me one after another on the pretext of supporting her son's education, and all of this money was taken from the savings of my wife and me.
I thought my wife would not notice it, but it turned out that my son opened a store 5 years ago and asked us to support 150,000 yuan, but my wife and I have already used up our savings and only have 90,000 yuan left. This time my wife discovered it. In order to hide it, I lied and said that I had lost money in the stock market. But my wife didn't believe it and insisted that I must be having an affair. After it was discovered that the money was gone, my wife and son began to follow me.
In the end, the affair between Axia and I came to light. My wife was very angry and behaved with me for a few days, and then filed for divorce. I was also angry at the time, and I was already tired of my wife, and Axia was very kind to me. In the end, I agreed to divorce without thinking about anything. The house in the city was given to my wife and son, so I took the remaining savings and returned to my hometown.
I thought that if I got divorced, Axia would remarry me. Who knew that after Axia knew that I had no house and could only go back to my hometown, and that I only had so little money left, she started to fall out with me. It didn’t take long. We broke up. What makes me very regretful is that when I gave money to Axia, I always gave it in cash. If I want Axia to pay back some money, I have no choice but to admit my defeat.
Today, I live alone in my hometown. Although the monthly pension is enough for me to live on, I am now very afraid of getting sick because I no longer have the capital to get sick. My wife has divorced, my savings are gone, and my son no longer cares about me. . Once I get sick, I don’t know what my life will be like.
I regret it very much. If I hadn't betrayed my marriage and gotten involved with women, maybe I wouldn't have lived such a miserable life. But regrets are useless. I can only seek happiness for myself.
Uncle Lu: If you don’t save money when you are rich, after a serious illness, you will only have a miserable old age.
I am 73 years old and my wife is 70 years old. We have been retired for more than ten years. Our pension has increased very high. The couple retires every month. The total gold amount is more than 8,000.With such a large pension, we should have been able to live a stable old age, but now the couple of us can only live in a nursing home, suffering from the desolation of our old age.
My wife and I have a son and a daughter, and both of them are quite promising. So after we retired, we thought that we would have children to take care of when we were old, so we didn’t save much money. Moreover, we also felt that we had worked hard for half our lives and finally retired. Yes, you have to enjoy it. So our monthly pension was used to eat, drink and have fun, and almost nothing was left every month.
During the first four or five years of retirement, my husband and I lived quite comfortably. We traveled everywhere, ate, drank and had fun. When we went shopping, we always bought the most expensive and best ones. We also exchanged furniture and appliances at home, no matter what we liked. If there is no use, I will buy it. I also often invited friends to eat and drink. At that time, many people liked to be friends with me, because when I was happy, I would take them to restaurants or invite them to drink and sing.
My children saw my wife and I squandering so much, and they once advised us. Especially my son and daughter-in-law often nagged us: "Mom, Dad, don't squander like this. Save some money so that we won't let it go." It’s a heavy burden!” But I don’t take it to heart because I feel that our children don’t need to bear anything at all. The monthly pension allows me to eat and drink, and I have medical insurance when I am sick.
However, in the 7th year of retirement, my wife and I got sick one after another, and the family became a mess. I first suffered from kidney stones, then arthritis, while my wife was more serious, and suffered a stroke, resulting in hemiplegia. During this period, my wife and I didn't save much money, and our medical insurance didn't reimburse us much. Many of the medical expenses were cobbled together by our children, which made them both heavily in debt. In the end, they complained a lot about us. They blame us for not saving even when we have money, but now we have to bear such a heavy burden when we get sick.
Originally, my wife and I needed to live with our children in their homes due to our physical condition, but neither my son nor my daughter accepted us. They said they could not take care of me. In the end, they used our pensions to send my wife and me there. Nursing home.
My wife and I have never had a good day since we moved into a nursing home. The environment here is depressing and formal. There are old, weak, sick and disabled people everywhere, and there is no atmosphere of healthy people. Although food and accommodation are provided, and someone takes care of her from time to time, it is still unbearable. She has lost her freedom here, and the company of her children, and is faced with endless desolation.
Aunt Wu: Ignoring the advice of her children, she pursued remarriage wholeheartedly, but ended up losing miserably.
I am 67 years old this year. I have been retired for 12 years and my wife has been gone for 8 years. When my wife left, he left me a house and a deposit of more than 200,000 yuan. Originally, with this money, I could have food and drink at night and be happy in my later years. But after my wife left, I ignored the advice of my children and pursued so-called happiness, which ended up ruining the rest of my life.
In the third year after my wife left, I couldn't help but feel lonely, so I carried my children on my back to find my wife. Soon, through a friend's introduction, I met Lao Chen, who was 4 years younger than me. This old Chen was divorced early, with average conditions, and came to work here from other places, but I liked him very much. Because he was very kind to me and didn't mind at all that I lost my husband or that I was older than him, so I quickly got together with Lao Chen and took him back to live in my home.
Lao Chen and I have lived secretly like this for a long time, and we have always lived happily. While Lao Chen was still working, I spent my own money every day to serve him, cook him delicious food, buy him clothes, and buy him a second-hand car for transportation. Lao Chen is also very good to me. He often surprises me and sends me flowers or some gadgets from time to time. Although they are not worth much, they are very satisfying to me.
However, when my children saw that I brought Lao Chen back to live with me and also contributed money and effort to serve him, they strongly opposed it. My son even came back, kicked Lao Chen out of the house, and warned Lao Chen in front of me. Can't interact with me. But at that time, I felt that my son had gone too far and was destroying my happiness, so I started to make trouble with my son and acted violently towards him.
My daughter also came back to convince me, saying that outsiders with unclear origins like me, Lao Chen, were unreliable and that I had to find someone local, with children and pensions. But I have fallen deeply in love with Lao Chen. I don’t love anyone but Lao Chen. I would rather fall out with my children than give up on Lao Chen.
In the end, I fought for my right to pursue happiness, but my son and daughter were heartbroken. My son said to me angrily: " You can live your life however you like, but if something happens in the future, don't do it." Come to me, I don’t recognize you as a mother ! "At that time, I felt that since I had Lao Chen and I had a pension and a house, I was not afraid of my son ignoring me. After all, they had not supported me much in these years.
I have been living together with Lao Chen for more than 3 years, but he refused to get the certificate from me, saying that it would be a good partnership. I was deceived by Lao Chen and thought that as long as we truly loved each other, it didn't matter whether we got the certificate or not.
However, when I was about to celebrate my 4th anniversary, I accidentally fell and had surgery on my lumbar spine. I could no longer stand for long periods of time or do physical work, and I needed help with many things. I thought that Lao Chen would serve me wholeheartedly, but in the second month after I was injured, Lao Chen left me impatiently.
This made me very sad and felt that I had been wrongly paid. Not only that, when I dragged my sick body to seek support from my son, my son also resisted me and told me to stay at home and stop bothering him. He said that if I really couldn't survive, I would go to a nursing home by myself, and he would not care about me anymore. My daughter too feels sorry for me, but there is nothing she can do.
In the end, I could only use the remaining savings to hire a nanny to take care of me, but this was not a long-term solution. When the savings ran out, I would not be able to hire a nanny with my small pension, and I would not be able to go to a nursing home even if I wanted to. Thinking of this, I feel inexplicably sad and regretful. If I had listened to my children's advice and given up on Lao Chen, maybe I wouldn't have lost so miserably and lived such a miserable life.
Conclusion:
What kind of old man will live a miserable life in his later years? After listening to the experiences of these three people, you can probably understand that old people who betray their marriages, do not know how to save money for retirement, are selfish, and ignore the family ties of their children will live a miserable life in their later years. In fact, in the final analysis, the desolation of most elderly people in their later years comes from their own character and ideological problems.
Therefore, I hope that in order to have a peaceful old age, the elderly should cherish marriage and family affection, correct their character, and finally plan their old age, so that we will not end up in a miserable old age!
