Among the three rebellious periods that children go through, the youth rebellious period spans from the age of 12 to 18, spanning the children's junior high school and high school. At this time, the children's self-awareness gradually strengthens, and they begin to have their own ideas and secrets. They no longer want their parents to treat them as children, so they will also have some rebellious behaviors in the eyes of their parents. Especially boys in the rebellious period of junior high school are relatively difficult to control.
Based on experience and cases, we have summarized many methods for educating boys in the rebellious period of junior middle school. Which methods have parents used?
1. Change the communication model: First of all, put down your arrogance as a parent and become your child’s friend. Through equality of status, let your child dare to tell you what’s on his mind. Secondly, learn to listen to your child's voice, do not interrupt the child at will, do not deliberately inquire into the child's privacy, talk about yourself and others, and let the child feel your sincerity. Finally, give your child positive feedback so that he or she can feel your care and feel more confident in communicating with you.
2. Accept children’s emotions: Emotions are very personal feelings, but they can be felt by each other.
Parents should allow their children's emotions to appear. This is an inevitable reaction during the rebellious period, and it may also be a signal asking you for help. When you sense your child's emotions, don't refuse or be prejudiced. You can take the initiative to lend a helping hand, ask the child what happened and if anyone needs help, encourage the child to express his or her current feelings, give affirmation, and finally give the child constructive suggestions.
3. Respect children's decisions: Parents will always unconsciously treat their children as their own private property. They hope to see their children grow up soon, but are unwilling to let them go completely. When children's rebellious period comes, they hope to be independent and get the respect they deserve. If they don't get what they want, they will engage in rebellious behavior to make themselves "independent." Most parents will choose to use beatings and scolding to try to make their children obedient.
This kind of education method can be seen on the one hand that parents are unable to cope with the changes in their children during the rebellious period; on the other hand, it can be seen that parents are not only unable to handle their own emotions correctly, but also make the parent-child relationship become rigid, dogmatic and lead to a dead end.
In fact, we only need to "respect" children. Treat the child as a real individual, respect the child's choices, give him enough independent space, do not criticize and educate the child in front of outsiders, and keep an appropriate distance from the child. When we give our children more respect, the more children can take care of their own self-esteem and pay attention to correcting their words and deeds.
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