text | You have a little bell pepper at home (original is not easy, please do not plagiarize, please reprint and share in person)
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When I was not a mother, I found such information, especially videos, which made me feel funny because I couldn’t empathize.
After having a daughter, I realized how difficult it is for these parents.
Not long ago, I saw a 985 doctoral mother crying when she was doing her homework. The mother was in a stable mood and was not so angry that her daughter was angry. She was just reflecting on her own problems.
Many parents cannot control their emotions. Previously, a highly educated mother from Nanjing was angry to ICU.
tutoring children to do homework is really a high-risk thing. As long as you enter this situation, it will be difficult to extricate yourself.
When I accompanied my daughter to watch Montessorimas, I was so angry that I wanted to hit my head
Now my daughter is 3 years old and has not yet received the pressure of studying. I have not yet experienced the feeling of my neighbor's mother accompanying her daughter to do her homework until 11 o'clock in the evening (I am confident now that I will not have such a bad experience because I am relieved).
However, I have had the bad experience of accompanying my child to learn Montessori mathematics, and I have already felt my irritability.
When a child is studying, his thinking jumps. The more angry you are, the more he jumps, the more he jumps. The simplest number of them is, she can count them for you. For example, there are five butterflies in total, she can count them for you, and no matter how many they are, she can count them for you, and even if they are counted, it is the case.
Wait until you get angry and irritable, She feels that she may have counted too many times, and she can count three or four of them for you. In short, you can't click one to count one, and can't accurately count these 5 butterflies.
I was so angry that I wanted to hit the wall. I was irritable and the child was still unhappy. She would ask me back: "Mom, what's wrong with you? Why are you so irritable? If you do this, I will learn from you, and I am also irritable..."
is really angry and funny when facing such a child.
But later I gradually felt relieved. When we entered this situation, it was difficult to extricate ourselves, it was easy to be irritable and angry. However, when we remind ourselves to get out of this situation, it was actually just that little thing, not worth so many bad emotions.
I found the correct way to deal with the phenomenon of child's ink traces and thinking jumping
Before, I accompanied her to learn arithmetic. The material I learned was "small wooden stakes". There were 20 small wooden stakes of two colors. I counted the number, put it a few, and then changed it to a number. She thought about whether to add or reduce it.
This is to train her mathematical thinking, and I hope to improve her mathematical thinking in this way.
At the beginning, the effect was not good at all. For example, if I said "4", she could put four, and if I said "6", she didn't know how to add two, and she had to put them again for a long time, and she might have counted the wrong number.
Later I discovered a phenomenon that every time I play for the first ten minutes, my child’s concentration is very good and he rarely makes mistakes, including when learning Montessorimas.
so I adjusted the method. As long as the child starts to get distracted and starts to think, I will stop.
gives children enough buffering time and growth time, which is more helpful to improve children's learning efficiency .
I feel that every day when I come into contact with these contents, my child has no room for improvement, so I called to stop. After half a month, when I took out these materials to tutor her, I was surprised to find that her progress was very obvious: rarely makes mistakes, and she can add and subtract based on the numbers she originally had. This progress is very obvious .
I have summarized a truth: wants children to make real progress, the method we need to use is to repeatedly guide and train with gaps.
What is the secret of repeated guidance and training with gaps in
learning lies in "repeat". Geniuses are a very rare person, and geniuses can be remembered through the eyes. Most children do not have such talent. If they want to let their children have a deep understanding of knowledge, then repeat.
However, in the process of repeated repetition, you should also reduce the expectations of the results.
Some time ago, my 3-year-old daughter was preparing for the manuscript of an English speech contest. For a 3-year-old child, it was difficult for me to recite a manuscript at first, mainly because the child did not cooperate.
I thought of a method, read it twice in the morning and twice before going to bed at night. At first, she rolled her eyes at me and ignored me. Later, she got used to this rhythm, and she could recite it by herself in a week.
This is the role of "repetition". No matter what the child learns, he cannot stop the power of "repetition". As long as he guides repeatedly, the child will be able to fully understand .
What does "with gaps" mean? Sometimes when you repeat it too much, the child becomes disgusted and gets bored, and repetition becomes useless, because when you repeat it, the child does not take it seriously at all and cannot listen at all, which is futile.
When we find such signs, then pause and pause the learning of this knowledge point that makes children disgusted. You can pause for one week or two weeks, and then turn it out to let the children experience it by themselves. You will find that the things that the children know nothing about have actually gained a new understanding of . This progress can bring us surprises and can also bring surprises to children. . This surprise is of great significance to children. This surprise can enhance their self-confidence in learning .
Conclusion:
Many scholars, doctoral students and even education experts are powerless when facing their children, and theory and practice cannot be combined with children.
This has a direct relationship with parents' expectations and the actual level of children. When we put aside high expectations and accept the ordinaryness of children, treats every child with our patience and methods, the mentality becomes much more peaceful, and this is a basis for children's progress.
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