Author: Zhao Xiaoming Editor: Cui Guanli
Xiaoming Quotations
Education needs to be within one's ability, and parents need to reduce their desires.
Important misunderstandings in family education : What a child learns has nothing to do with what he or she will do in the future.
Questions from parents
A mother said that her 22-year-old child does nothing, not even decoration. To be honest, the child is 22 and still has nothing to do with it. In this way, it takes too much time to change the child.
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
There are ways to change adults, but the time and energy required must be the teacher who is willing to pay.
Let me tell you something very realistic. To be honest, at my level, I have certain methods to change anyone. Although I cannot completely guarantee the results, if I want to improve, I definitely have a way.
Even a person who is suffering from depression wants to commit suicide. If I am willing to pay, I can let him live for a longer period of time, and it is even possible that he will be completely changed.
But the premise of all this is that when the teacher allocates his time , he must allocate it to what he thinks is the most valuable thing , and this is selfish, not completely selfless.
Parents ask questions
Understand and support teachers
Buddha is destined to be a person, and only when he is destined to be with the teacher can he understand the teacher! !
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
I have changed the destiny of many people in my field, so I know that we have such ability.
Now my biggest motivation to do things actually comes from the fact that I see that parents and many visitors are really pitiful, because what most people in our industry are engaged in is actually misleading.
So I want to give you some correct methods. I can help one by one, but it is just a few clicks. Can you absorb it? Then it depends on your own blessings.
For example, there are many people on the Internet who talk about learning methods and , about children's growth, children's education, and psychological problems. They are basically wrong.
So if no one speaks the truth, then no truth will be heard.
Parent questions
Yes, some people have limited ability to understand and execute.
Human growth puzzle, piece by piece to complete it
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
For example, you watch this video. What this person
said is only correct in theory, but it is completely wrong when contemporary children grow up, and it will also bring worse negative consequences.
This is the problem with many so-called "experts" currently. It is that they do not have a comprehensive understanding of children's growth. Their understanding is too superficial, and then they start to give advice to parents.
You see, this video has a lot of clicks. And many parents agree very much, which misleads even more parents.
But I donât have time to refute every such wrong statement. It would be too much work.
will give you a simple example. What is the mistake of the person above?
Parent
I used to pay attention to this person. After studying Teacher Xiao Mingâs class, I became more and more judgmental about people and things.
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
His premise is already wrong. For example, a child's enlightenment depends on the accumulation of knowledge. It seems that this logic is correct.
But the prerequisite is:
- First, Today's children, their learning load is too heavy . Under such circumstances, it is almost impossible for people to continue to gain enlightenment by increasing the accumulation of knowledge. They simply do not have such time or brainpower.
- Second, the prerequisite for being able to gain enlightenment through knowledge accumulation is that children or an adult are willing to spend all their time and energy on learning.
This premise is that this person has already learned for whom, and what is the purpose and significance of learning ? He must first become enlightened about this matter.
And this is almost impossible for today's children.
So the premise of his video is wrong , the conclusion is meaningless, and it cannot be implemented at all.
Think about how many videos like this there are on the Internet now? They all look beautiful, but they all mislead parents to more wrong channels time and time again.
In today's situation where children have generally lost their desires, if we try to increase knowledge accumulation for children, the final result will be that children will become more desperate, eventually leading to lying down, playing games or committing suicide.
This is why I am very worried about this type of fake and shoddy childrenâs education being spread so widely on the Internet.
But I donât want to say too much. If I say too much, it will make people feel as if I am always blocking their way of making money, and in the end I will become the target of public criticism.
If I approved every fake and shoddy video on the Internet, I would become a resentful woman.
So I can only turn a blind eye. Occasionally I will tell you a few words to remind you when I see it.
Chinaâs kindergarten education has begun to teach primary school content in advance. Basic education in primary school, junior high school and high school is generally more difficult than education in the West.
Therefore, the brain stimulation that Chinese children receive is often excessive.
If more extracurricular tutoring is given to children, such as Mathematical Olympiad, English, Chinese and other similar off-campus training, it will inevitably cause psychological pressure on the children and excessive cognitive burden on the brain.
Most children have a moderate level of intellectual development. The educational requirements are higher than their actual level.
Therefore, many children gradually lose interest in learning during this cultivation process, and even gradually lose interest in school. As a result, many students began to drop out or refuse to go to school when they reached middle school or high school.
However, it is undeniable that a very small number of children with superior intelligence and premature brain development are adapted to this method. Too much brain-stimulating educational activity is basically good for them. However, special attention must be paid to the character development of these gifted children.
Because most children are not gifted children, or other talents need to wait until later to emerge. Therefore, losing interest in education prematurely is a bad thing.
So I would like to emphasize to parents here that whether to arrange for children to participate in off-campus training classes prematurely should be based on the child's tolerance and emotional response.
In general, Xiao Ming still recommends participating in real nature-based play activities and interacting with children. These activities will stimulate the natural development of the brain more and prevent the child's brain from being overly occupied prematurely, which will eventually lead to lack of stamina in the future.
- Excerpted from Xiao Ming's book "The Third Generation of Children's Psychological Education"
Parents
Yes, the prerequisite for enlightenment is "the child wants to learn"
I have read it before, but I will never read it again after meeting the teacher. 0 What a better way to learn Itâs useless. The first step Teacher Xiao Ming said is to inspire children to want to learn.
Recently, I have prepared many outdated toys to play with my children. These are four important conditions for Teacher Xiao Ming. I always keep them in mind.
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
Many so-called experts apply adult theories to children, which harms many children and parents.
This is the same as the diagnosis of mental illness. The diagnosis of children's mental illness is completely different from the diagnosis of adult mental illness. However, many hospitals in our country use the same standards for diagnosing mental illness in adults when diagnosing children.
At present, our country has the ability to diagnose children's mental illness, and there are actually very, very few people who are qualified for psychiatric diagnosis.
So psychology and education are very difficult subjects to learn. Many theories must pay attention to its applicability. It's not like you can just pick up any theory and apply it.
Parent questions
Teacher, I have a friendâs daughter, and her mother is worried to death. She has no desires and desires since the second grade, and nothing can inspire her will!
Her daughter likes to stay in hotels. Her mother said that you should study hard and I will take you to live there after you pass the exam. Her daughter immediately said, then I wonât stay there anymore. No tablet, TV, travel, or toys can arouse her interest.
The teacher asked her to copy at school as a punishment. She could finish it in 20 minutes, but she wrote it for more than 4 hours! Her mother has no idea what to do!
Teacher, what should we do with this kind of child? When we came out to play, she was not interested.
I told her mother to take her out to play with children more often, but when I brought her out, she didnât play or talk much!
Her mother said that at home, as long as you donât talk about studying, itâs fine. If you talk, as long as you talk about studying, you donât say anything. Anything that has nothing to do with studying is fine!
Teacher Xiao Ming answers questions
The earlier you change, the better the effect. The later you change, the more psychological skills are required.
Xiao Ming Quotes
For a child, the worst thing is not that his parents have strict requirements on him, but that his parents ignore and indifference him, and forbid the child to speak, which is equivalent to the parents prohibiting the child from investing libido in himself.
Original public account: Heart Partner (ID: xhbeap)
