Father, you should be a participant, not a bystander.
A child only grows up once. It is the unshirkable responsibility of every father to provide him with the best companionship and education.
Author | Director of Potato Mom
Ang Lee once said:
"Just because I am a father and a husband does not mean that I can naturally gain their respect.
You still have to earn their respect every day, and you have to meet a certain standard. This is one of the reasons why I don’t slack off. "
It’s not like being a father physically means that your children will naturally love you and respect you.
How can I become a good and qualified father?
People’s Daily once gave 10 suggestions, which are worth sharing with all dads and collecting them for repeated reading.
The first step to being a good father is to be your child’s childhood playmate, understand his imagination, and appreciate his innocence and romance.
Feng Zikai has seven children, all of whom are outstanding.
He has liked to play with his children since he was a child. In the eyes of the world, many "naughty child behaviors" are the children's unique creativity and imagination.
You can ask to remove the roof of the house to facilitate viewing of airplanes;
You can ask to grow flowers and plants and flying butterflies in the sleeping bed , just for For play;
Barefoot stools also need to be put on shoes...
He will not interfere with the children's "mischief" or remind the children to "be careful".
On the contrary, he will bend down, enter the child's world, play with him and accompany him crazy.
This is not indulgence, but the wisdom of entertaining and educating.
Psychologist Piaget said that childhood is a critical period for children's cognitive development, especially their daily activities, and it is also the best way to educate them.
When playing with his children, the father's unique spirit of adventure and exploration can release the child's nature, stimulate the child's desire to explore, and awaken the child to more possibilities.
A father who is neither big nor small, full of childlike innocence is the greatest luck for his children.
A father likes to drink and goes to the town pub for a drink every day.
One day it was snowing heavily, and he walked to the tavern as usual.
Suddenly, he found that someone seemed to be following him behind him.
When I looked back, my son, who was under 8 years old, was following his footsteps, and he said very excitedly: "Dad, the snow is so thick, I am walking on your footprints!"
Son's words It cheered him up. From that day on, he no longer went to the pub to drink. Instead, he went into the town library to read.
Many educational problems seem to be caused by children, but the "roots" lie in adults.
If you lie on the sofa and play with your mobile phone every day, you will also get a child who lies down playing with your mobile phone and watching videos.
If you can't afford to stay up late every morning, you will get a child with day and night reversed and wasted years.
Try to be a learning father, because example is more effective than reprimand.
The father is the "important other person" in the child's life and is also the child's first role model.
Father’s tenacity, tenacity, and sense of responsibility, each of these labels will become the best textbook for his children.
is just like Dong Yuhui. From being ignored to being popular all over the Internet, he has thanked his father many times.
"I am becoming more and more like him. It was my father who influenced my values."
In his eyes, his father, who was born as a farmer, was like a wise man who led him through countless darkest moments.
When he collapsed, he warned himself: I can't have a soft heart. My father has suffered much more than me. He has never complained, and I am not qualified.
When he wanted to give up, he hinted to himself: My father is still reading with a hoe in hand, what reason do I have to be depressed and complain?
His father’s hard work, simplicity, perseverance and optimism gave him an indomitable fighting spirit, the courage to face difficulties and the determination to never give up.
A father’s love contains great courage and strength.
A father’s attitude towards life is the best nourishment and example for his children.
There is a kind of father who only gives orders to his children and suppresses them as an adult.
"I am your father, you must obey me in everything!"
"What do you know, a kid?"
Wang Zengqi once severely criticized:
"A father who wants to shape his children with his own ideal model is stupid and hateful.
A modern and humane family must first To live in peace, parents should teach others to respect each other while also treating each other as equals. "
If your children avoid you, are afraid of you, tremble when you mention them, and dare not tell you when something happens, then you are definitely not a child. Good father.
Loving children is an instinct, and respecting children is a kind of education.
You might as well squat down more often, listen to your child's voice, understand your child's thoughts, respond to your child's needs, and accept your child's emotions.
Only in this way will your children get close to you, respect you, fear you, and have endless things to say with you.
A child in adolescence deliberately did not do homework, talked back to the teacher, and even skipped school.
was caught by his father one day in an Internet cafe. Surprisingly, his father did not beat or scold him, but just took him home and said, "There are no children who cannot teach well, only fathers who cannot teach them! I know the problem is On my body."
From that day on, my father changed his schedule and insisted on picking up and dropping off his children in person every day.
A few years later, the child was admitted to a key university.
The father’s patience, warmth and kindness brought a rebellious and difficult-to-manage child back from the edge of the cliff.
Li Meijin once emphasized that a father must be "kind".
Because the father is powerful and loving, the child thinks that someone is holding him up and the sky cannot fall.
She also pointed out that a father’s love should give children two feelings:
should give children a kind of mind. told him that this matter is a big deal at the moment, but it is not a big deal in retrospect.
I have power, but I don’t abuse it casually. I feel like I am a friend with my children. gives suggestions to the child and tells him what to do.
A father who treats his children as "students" is a stubborn father and a father who does not know how to grow.
When a child says the sky is pink, he rushes to correct it;
When a child gets covered in mud, he rushes to stop it;
When a child thinks the cat and mouse are friends, he scolds him for being childish.
Many fathers are always aloof and try to use their life experience to command and control their children.
But they don’t know that if a father does not have a humble attitude, he cannot educate his children well.
The best fathers take their sons as their teachers.
As the psychologist Piero Ferrucci said:
"As a parent, you are given the privilege of caring for a child. , and the possibility of growing up again. "
A father who does not look at his children's problems with colored glasses, does not imprison his children's thoughts with standard answers, admits his own shortcomings, and sees his children's advantages is a truly wise father.
There is a video of a conversation between a father and his son on the Internet, which can be called an excellent example of positive discipline from a father.
The cause of the incident was that my brother did not do his homework well and was criticized by his mother.
The two brothers refused to obey the discipline and thought that their mother was at fault first, so they went to their father to complain.
The child was so naughty and difficult to control. Instead of scolding and scolding him harshly, his father persuaded him with reason:
"Everything has a cause and effect. Mom only got angry when you didn't do things well."
"Everyone has things they don't want to do. If we don’t do anything, society will be in chaos.”
"Is the traffic policeman willing to stand on the road and eat exhaust fumes? Aren't medical staff afraid when the epidemic is at its worst? But they still have no hesitation."
...
Present facts, reason, and analyze with the children in an orderly manner until The child was convinced.
Good fathers know how to teach and teach their children to understand the truth and distinguish right from wrong.
Good education teaches children the principles and principles of doing things and being a good person in a kind and firm atmosphere.
The famous education expert Sun Yunxiao once talked about a personal experience of his.
One evening, he took a taxi on the streets of Beijing.
The driver was a middle-aged man and seemed to be in a good mood, so the two started chatting.
When the driver heard that Sun Yunxiao was engaged in children's education, he was very surprised: "What kind of children's education do you guys do?"
When Sun Yunxiao learned that he had a 9-year-old daughter, he asked him, "You don't care about children's education?" "Education?"
Unexpectedly, he said "Hi" disapprovingly: "Educating children is my damn business, I just care about making money."
This father is the epitome of most absentee fathers in China.
Psychologist Hu Shenzhi said: 90% of the shortcomings in life come from the absence of father's love.
Please every father, please pay attention to the "important moments" of your child's growth, so that he can feel loved and valued.
Please celebrate your child's birthday together;
Please applaud your child's performance;
Please accompany your child to attend his sports meeting.
The father is the person who determines the character of the child and establishes the trajectory of the child's life. Father's education is indispensable and cannot be replaced.
Researchers from Newcastle University in the UK conducted a follow-up survey of 17,000 babies for 11 years.
The results show that children who spend time with their fathers tend to be smarter, more energetic and more sociable.
No matter how rich the material is, it cannot replace the role of the father;
No matter how capable the mother is, it cannot replace the role of the father.
There is no great skill in educating children, it is just love and companionship.
Don’t think that these little things are insignificant, they are related to the child’s lifelong happiness and future.
Psychologists once concluded such a rule:
The same sentence, if spoken by the father, has 50 times the influence on the child than the mother.
A father’s mouth is the child’s way.
If you give your children blows, criticisms, and accusations, they will be destined to be full of thorns and darkness along the way.
If you give your children encouragement, praise, and affirmation, they will often reap flowers and light along the way.
Some people say that what China needs education most is not its children but its parents, especially fathers.
Once you have a baby, you can’t “return” it. As a father, you must be responsible to the end.
A good father can realize that the way home from get off work is the way home.
A good father can understand that educating children has an expiration date.
A good father will work hard to cultivate himself as a role model for his children.
No matter how busy a father is, he must strive to be a good father and a good leader for his children.
Like "Like" and share it with all dads to encourage us!
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